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The first time it slipped out, Azzi genuinely didn't mean to say it.

They weren't friends yet, even though they had been roommates for almost two months. Sarah was still in her quiet freshman phrase, polite and reserved, communicating mostly through nods, hums, and facial expressions that did a lot of heavy lifting. 

Azzi clocked that immediately and respected it. She wasn't someone who pressed people's button who hadn't clearly opted in.

Which made it especially unfortunate that the button pressed itself.

It was their third home game, and Azzi's first official one back. She was still riding that easy post-game buzz when Sarah's mom, Allison Feaster, came up to her afterward.

She pulled Azzi into a quick hug, and told her how good it was to see her back and how everything would fall into place soon. It was warm, supportive, and completely normal.

Azzi also noticed, purely observationally, that Sarah's mom was hot. 

It was not a thought she lingered on or planned to share. Her brain simply filed it under facts and moved on.

Until she could not take it back.

Later that night, back at their apartment, Azzi was in the kitchen eating cottage cheese straight from the container, while Sarah hovered nearby scrolling on her phone.

They were having a chill conversation after a tiring match day.

"How was your family after the game?" Azzi asked casually.

Sarah shrugged. "Good. My mom was happy."

Azzi nodded, spoon tapping lightly against the container, and without any buildup, without even looking up, said,

"Dude, your mom is hot."

Sarah froze.

She looked up slowly, like her brain needed a second to confirm that sentence had actually been spoken aloud. She blinked, then she made a face that very clearly said this sentence is illegal.

Azzi realized a beat too late that something had gone off-script.

"Respectfully," she added quickly. 

"Bro," Sarah said, sitting up straighter, colour flooding her cheeks. "What does that even mean."

Azzi glanced over, genuinely thoughtful. "It means I am being polite about it."

"That makes it worse," Sarah said immediately, hands coming up like she could physically block the words. "You can't just say that about someone's mom."

Azzi opened her mouth to apologize and then stopped.

Because Sarah wasn't shutting down. She wasn't retreating, she was talking and reacting and making faces. This was, by far, the most animated Azzi had seen her since move-in day.

Interesting.

Azzi nodded seriously. "Okay. I hear you. I will rephrase."

"Do not rephrase," Sarah groaned. "Absolutely do not rephrase."

Azzi leaned back against the counter, clearly enjoying herself now. "I just mean she has very strong baddie energy."

"AZZI," Sarah said, fully scandalized now, hands flying up to cover her face. "Please stop talking."

Azzi laughed, soft and delighted. "You don't have to listen."

"I live here," Sarah shot back. "I literally do."

Azzi shrugged. "That's tough."

Sarah stared at her. "Why are you like this."

Azzi shrugged. "Your mom set the bar very high."

Sarah made a noise somewhere between a gag and a laugh, shaking her head. "I hate you."

Azzi chuckled. "No, you don't."

There was a pause.

Sarah dropped her hands and glared at her, flustered and very clearly engaged. "Please don't ever say that again."

Azzi nodded solemnly. "Okay. I won't."

She waited just long enough to be annoying.

"…Out loud," she added.

"…You are annoying," Sarah muttered.

Azzi's smile widened. "I will take it."

Azzi watched her for a moment, still smiling, something warm and amused settling in her chest.

Oh, she thought, so this is fun.

And just like that, completely by accident, the joke became their thing.

The team canteen had fully slipped into pre-holiday chaos. Trays half-finished, conversations overlapping, everyone talking about flights and rides to visit their family for the upcoming short Christmas break.

"I am flying home for those days," Kaitlyn Chen said, poking at her food. "My mom already asked if I am landing before or after rush hour like that's something I control."

Azzi shrugged. "Paige and I are driving and meeting up with them in New York first."

Sarah had been quiet, listening, until she chimed in without thinking.

"My mom is picking me up at the airport in Boston tomorrow."

That was all she said, completely harmless. Azzi's fork stopped midair.

She turned slowly toward Sarah, that now very familiar, deeply suspicious smile spreading across her face.

"Oh," Azzi said, leaning back in her chair. "Lucky you."

Sarah narrowed her eyes. "Don't."

Azzi ignored the warning. "Tell her I said hi."

Sarah groaned and shoved Azzi's shoulder. "Stop. Right now."

Azzi laughed, openly delighted.

Kaitlyn looked between them, confused. "Why is she reacting like that? Fudd, what did you do?"

Sarah froze, sighed, and rubbed her face like she was explaining something she hated admitting.

"Because," she said flatly, "Azzi thinks my mom is hot."

There was a beat. Kaitlyn looked at Azzi. Azzi lifted her eyebrows slightly, like well?

Kaitlyn nodded slowly. "Yeah, that tracks."

Sarah's head snapped up. "What do you mean that tracks?"

"I mean," Kaitlyn said, shrugging, "she is just speaking facts."

Azzi pointed at her immediately. "Thank you."

"You are both terrible," Sarah said, already gathering her things. "This is bullying."

"Complimenting," Azzi corrected.

"It's my mom," Sarah shot back.

"A very impressive mom," Azzi added helpfully.

Sarah stood up abruptly, bag slung over her shoulder. "I hate both of you."

"Love you too," Azzi called after her.

Sarah kept walking.

Azzi leaned back and wasn't done yet. "I can drop you off at the airport," she added loudly, "so your hot mom can pick you up on the other side!"

Sarah didn't turn around. She just lifted a hand in a very clear fuck you gesture and disappeared through the door.

Azzi and Kaitlyn collapsed into laughter.

Kaitlyn wiped her eyes. "You are never letting this go, are you?"

Azzi smiled, completely unashamed. "Why would I? It works every time."

And just like that, the joke officially graduated from roommate nonsense to team-known bit much to Sarah's ongoing regret.

Sarah was stretched out on the living room couch, phone propped in her hand as she FaceTimed her mom. She looked noticeably more relaxed than usual, smiling easily, nodding along as her mom talked about travel plans and what time she would be in town.

"Yeah, I will be ready," Sarah said. "No, I didn't forget to…"

The front door opened. Sarah's head snapped up in instant alarm.

"Okay I have to go," she said immediately, words tumbling over each other. "I will call you later mom, love you, bye."

The call ended before her mom could even respond.

Azzi stepped fully into the apartment, takeout bags swinging lightly from her hand. She stopped, took in the scene, and then broke into a slow, deeply pleased grin.

"…Wow," Azzi said. "Rude. I didn't even get to say hi to Miss Allison."

"You are not allowed near my mom," Sarah replied, getting up from the couch.

Azzi set the food down on the counter. "I literally brought you dinner."

"That doesn't earn you mom access."

Azzi hummed, pretending to consider this.  "Okay. Fair, I guess…" She paused. "…Still though," she added casually, "Just a quick glance would have been enough..."

Sarah groaned. "Bro. Stop."

Azzi laughed and handed her the bag. "Eat. You will feel better."

Sarah took it, glaring. "I am not thanking you."

"That's fine," Azzi replied easily. "Your mom probably would."

Sarah gagged dramatically. "That's disgusting."

"I am just saying," Azzi continued, leaning back against the counter, clearly enjoying herself, "she would probably be happy knowing I take good care of our girl."

Sarah stopped mid-step and turned slowly. "I hate that sentence. Why are you so weird about my mom."

Azzi shrugged. "Because it makes you do that."

"I am telling your girlfriend," Sarah shot back immediately. "I am telling her you think that my mom is hot."

Azzi shrugged, completely unbothered. "You can."

Sarah stared at her. "You are not denying it?"

"Why would I?"

Sarah stared at her, horrified. "You talked to Paige about my mom?!"

Azzi nodded calmly. "She has eyes."

Sarah followed her toward the kitchen, shaking her head. "I can't believe this is my life."

Behind her, Azzi laughed softly, and already filed this away as another successful use of the bit.

They were halfway through warmups, moving through the familiar routine of passing lines and layups, music echoing through the arena while the stands slowly filled. 

Azzi was dribbling back toward half court when she slowed, her eyes flicking past Sarah's shoulder. A slow, unmistakable grin spread across her face.

Sarah noticed immediately.

"What," she said, already suspicious.

Azzi didn't answer. She just kept smiling and lifted her hand in a small wave.

Sarah turned around just in time to see Allison Feaster step into the courtside section and take a seat. Tight jeans and leather jacket, fully committing to the effortlessly cool mom look.

Sarah closed her eyes for a second.

When she turned back, she fired the ball at Azzi a little harder than necessary.

Azzi caught it easily and burst out laughing.  She looked back at Sarah, eyes bright, already enjoying herself.

Sarah pointed at her. "Do not."

Azzi grinned wider. "Do not what?"

"You know exactly what," Sarah said. "Do not say it."

Azzi dribbled once, shrugging like she was being reasonable. "I am not saying anything."

"Yes you are," Sarah said. "You are thinking it."

Azzi laughed. "Okay, but that's not illegal."

"Stop thinking it."

"I can't help it," Azzi said cheerfully. "I just love when your mom is courtside."

Sarah groaned and turned away, refusing to acknowledge her for the rest of warmups.  No eye contact, just tight jaw, full focus. Azzi, for her part, looked absolutely delighted.

When the game started, though, everything snapped into place.

Sarah still didn't say a word to her, but she fed Azzi perfect pass after perfect pass. Wide open in the corner, clean cut to the basket and even a no-look assist that made the crowd react.

Azzi drained the shots, running back on defense with a grin that never left her face.

From the courtside, Allison cheered loudly. Azzi noticed and Sarah very deliberately did not. The joke survived another quarter.

After the game, once Azzi was done with the on-court interview and had signed merches for fans lingering near the tunnel, she finally took a second to look around and see who was still on the floor.

That was when she spotted them.

Sarah was standing near the sideline with her mom, mid-conversation, both of them relaxed now that the game was over. 

Azzi's attention locked in immediately and slowed without realizing it. She must have been staring, because Allison Feaster noticed, smiled, and lifted her hand in a small, unmistakable come here gesture.

Sarah caught it at the exact same time.

She turned and shot Azzi the sharpest side eye she had perfected all season.

Azzi, of course, ignored it.

She jogged over with the biggest grin on her face and went straight in for a hug, warm and enthusiastic, clearly pleased with herself. Sarah immediately reached out, grabbed Azzi's arm, and started pulling her toward the locker room.

"We are leaving," Sarah said through her teeth.

Azzi let herself be dragged for exactly two steps before slowing just enough to look back.

"Merry Christmas," she called over her shoulder, smiling sweetly. "Hope you have a great holiday."

Allison laughed and waved back. Sarah did not look.

The locker room door swung shut behind them.

Sarah didn't hesitate. She punched Azzi lightly on the shoulder. "You are so lucky you are the best shooter on this team."

Azzi laughed, completely unbothered. "What? I was being polite."

"If you weren't," Sarah continued, pointing at her, "I would never pass you the ball again for hitting on my mom."

Azzi's shoulders shook as she laughed harder. "Worth it."

Sarah shook her head, trying very hard not to smile as she walked deeper into the room, already resigned to the fact that this was just how things were now.

The bit had been going for over a year, at this point, it wasn't going anywhere.

Azzi brought it up like it was no big deal.

They were sitting in Azzi's living room, Azzi was scrolling through something on her phone when she glanced over and said, casual as anything, "You should come on my podcast."

Sarah didn't even look up. "No."

Azzi smiled. "You didn't let me finish."

"I don't need to," Sarah replied. "Still no."

"It would be good for you," Azzi continued anyway. "You are working on talking more on camera. This is good practice."

"I don't do podcasts," Sarah said. "I barely do eye contact."

Azzi smiled, patient. "That's why it's perfect. You don't have to perform. You don't have to answer anything you don't want to. I'll be there the whole time."

Sarah finally looked at her, suspicious. "You say that like you are not the problem."

Azzi put a hand on her chest. "I would never make it weird."

Sarah snorted.

Azzi softened a bit then, genuinely encouraging. "You have been working on this. Being more comfortable on camera. This could help. And if it's awful, we never talk about it again."

There was a pause. Sarah thought about it longer than Azzi expected.

"…I will do it," Sarah said slowly.

Azzi brightened immediately. "Yeah?"

"But," Sarah added, pointing at her, "you have to give up the 'your mom is hot' joke."

Azzi froze.

She frowned, biting her lip, staring at the floor like she had just been asked to give up a limb. You could practically see the gears turning, the internal battle playing out in real time.

"That's a big ask," Azzi said carefully.

Sarah crossed her arms. "It is my only condition."

Azzi thought about it for a long moment. Then she looked up, eyes brightening with a sudden idea.

"I will," she said slowly, "if your mom joins the podcast too."

Sarah stared at her. "…You are joking."

Azzi held out her hand. "Deal or no deal."

Sarah hesitated, groaned, and then, against her better judgment, shook on it.

By the time the episode actually recorded, Sarah knew she had been set up.

It had started innocently enough, just her, Azzi, and Ashanti talking about growing up in Spain, how it felt coming back to the US, her early basketball days. Sarah had relaxed into it, answering questions to her best ability.

That lasted until Allison's name came up.

"I love when your mom is courtside," Azzi said at one point, entirely unprompted. "It's my favourite."

Sarah shot her a look.

"Courtside baddies" Ashanti commented with a big grin.

"She is," Azzi continued, nodding along, "She is a courtside baddie."

"No."

After Azzi nearly choked laughing when Allison smiled again at the start of their mom section, Sarah stopped fighting it altogether. When they wrapped, she didn't even bother arguing.

"You are never going to stop being the 'dude, your mom is hot' friend, are you?" Sarah asked, defeated.

Azzi leaned back in her chair, tired but happy, still smiling. "Dude, I tried…"

She shrugged.

"…but your mom is too hot."