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@bestcaptainevr
{ Parody account ran by @skhiz }
{ Posts show up whenever I really feel like it, but I’ll try to post regularly. }

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
Whoa! Who bumped into red? Could it be a certain crewmate ?
Ugh— seriously? watch where you’re
going
ah.
{ MOD EDIT: Due to more personal things going on I may not be able to answer questions as quickly as I began, but I’ll still absolutely get to answering them. }
Where is everyone during this whole black out?
Gooood question actually…
I mean, obviously Yellow and Brown are in the kitchen. Black and Cyan are probably doing their tasks with the Ore+, Purps is definitely watching the cameras, dunno where some of the others are..
Oouf-
What? You gonna look it up in your handbook on how to fix the lights?
(OOC: wasn't planning to but i guess im purple now lol XD )
ACTUALLY, did it aaalll by myself. No biggie, I’m just a natural.
Then why did you let the contest winner drive the ship? Everyone almost died because of your incompetence
You know, I’m REALLY trying my best here. Just did the lights by myself! I’m the captain for a reason. It’s almost like everyone finds it so interesting to blame me for every little thing ever.
They should be back on any second..

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What is happening in the ship for the lights to go out?
I don’t know! The systems have been fine other than when the asteroid hit, I can’t think of any reason why it’s acting up..
Maybe it’s just faulty wiring.
do you have different colored thongs for each special occasion perchance
I have NO idea what you’re talking about, haha!
maybe
"Nobody else"?
Why? Is it because they're all incompetent like you
Gee, I’m starting to get the hint of who this is. And NO I’m NOT incompetent. I’m actually good at what I do.
Are you gonna fix the lights red?
???
I mean…
Guess I don’t have much of a choice.. since apparently nobody else on this ship can do anything.
.
A blackout? I thought the systems were…
.
.
great.
{ CREATOR EDIT; I changed the style a bit jst to make it easier for me to work with 🥹 I hopethatsok, it’s just really difficult to draw anatomy for a human vers!!)

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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Red are you ok? You look less cheerful and more tired
Mm?
.
.
OH! Yeah, yeah. I’m great! Just haven’t gotten much sleep lately! I’m so glad the ship has an autopilot…
.
.
.
{ Asks will be answered at 12 PM EST! Goodnight!! —S }
“how are you doing mentally?” They wrap around Red a bit.
FROM: @the-lavenders-lament
I’m alright. I mean, the captain has gotta be strong and reliable, right?
The crew needs someone to trust when times get tough.
Yeah.
To be honest red the only time i'll ever see you be a good captain is when you're not ignorant on the mistakes you made and not depending on that stupid handbook
.
.
That sounds veeery familiar.
Hey red how are you doing, and hows your relationship with all your crew?
I think it really just depends on who you ask..
OBVIOUSLY me and Blue are like, totally best buds, but I’ll never understand why they bother with Lime. Cyan is nice and all, but I don’t really get the fascination with vibes. I don’t think I’ve really ever chatted with Black, no offense but they’re just kinda.. never mind.
Orange is sort of frustrating, but I doubt they mean any harm. That new intern is fine, kind of a suck-up if you ask me… Yellow and Brown are.. well, they cook. That’s all I really know about those two. That contest-winner has a drinking problem. And..
I think that just leaves Purple. They’re.. difficult.

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i feel like everyone is. making comments on my leadership, like im not doing enough
but i think im a good leader. ive been doing my best
.
i just cant disappoint anyone.
i can’t disappoint pink.
everything is going in circles.
I don’t know what else to do.