i don't do bad sauce passes
I'd rather be in outer space đ¸
we're not kids anymore.

çĽćĽ / Permanent Vacation

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"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"

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@bestbun

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Source: Inaba of the moon and Inaba of the earth
The featureless figure rolled a head of lettuce towards the Rabbit Youkai. "D'ere ya' go."
Tewi regarded the... Odd fellow for a long moment before stooping down to check out the produce.
"Looks good, usa. You, uh... Grow it yourself? Just a buck... Or doe? Without a face that gives people vegetables?" She lifted the lettuce up to take a bite, but hesitated. It didn't smell poisonous or explosive... "This won't blow up or anything, right? I've heard rumors about gray people and it's never good."
Send my muse some bad pick-up lines!

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nekofantasiaâ:
âDonât you know? I see everything. A quantum unobservable being that can observe everything!â But then she lets out a chuckle and shakes her head. âNah, Iâm kidding. Iâve been told that youâre cute apparently and you do seem the sort to lure people around so, I can see that.â
âMe? Lure people? Two jokes for the price of one with you, haha ha! What a kidder... Iâm too busy keeping the Sanzu river clean to lure anyone into anything! If I take even a single day off, the river would be filthy with garbage!â
âAnd well the white rabbitâŚyeah, I can see that a bit. I guess.â
âWhat? I didnât do anything, you didnât see anything. What?â
âAssemble!â
âBad news, I fear. Weâre out of sunflower seeds.â Tewi held up her hands to beg for calm as the buns all clamored for attention. âWe canât hit the garden of the sun again; at least not yet. Donât worry though! I have a plan.â
âWeâre going to raid the human village for their supply of seeds.â The assembled buns cheered.
knightshonourâ:
Truthfully, Firelink was a bit out of the way, but itâs still feasible to make it there without too much hassle. However, one must be willing to allow the lesser demon gargoyles to shuttle them there. A quite.. unpleasant prospect, but at the very least there is minimal harm from it.
âYouâll be trailing through a treacherous walk. But as far as Iâm aware, once youâre through it, you should be sent straight there.â Again with the offer of currency, something that bared no use for.. well, any, in this day and age. Given the uncertainty and his unwillingness to lure her to something potentially far more dangerous than the few hollows sheâs encountered, Rowan would need to ask one last time.
âThe fastest path is also the most dangerous. Demons often emerge to enforce chaos.â Rowan would know, given that he unfortunately is bound to seek them, to slay them.
âIf youâre certain youâre willing to risk yourself, you can follow me there. But be aware that youâll be in far more danger than you already are out here, following me.â
She sighed and dropped down to sit on her behind unceremoniously. Dangerous to go alone, dangerous to go with the buck... This place sucked!
It didnât take much in the way of acting to produce a convincingly somber face.
âI donât suppose weâre talking about Makaiian demons, are we? Shinkiâs bunch? Iâve dealt with them before in passing...â Just judging from the size the buckâs sword, she was betting that heâd get along with the goddessâs maid. At the very least, Tewi was sure theyâd have plenty to discuss, but that was nothing but wool-gathering! She shook her head to clear it. âNevermind, usa! Which is the safe bet: staying here or risking the trip to the shrine?â
thathermitwiththehairpinâ:
âHoly fucking Jesuâ âŚthose are perfectâŚ!â
The speakers finally made Seiga break from her comfortable seated position, and now she was hovering around each of the behemoths, hands petting the top of each with every circle around. She eventually stopped right between them, resting one hand atop each, and looked directly into Tewiâs eyes. Her face had prepped for the landing of another C130.
âSo⌠you wanna pick the song, Tewi?â
Thereâs probably some commentary to be made about two very old women bonding over and being utterly gleeful about the impending misery of another, but really, thatâs just Gensokyo. Itâs a place like that, take it or leave it... And there really isnât any good way of leaving it once youâre inside the barrier.
âIâm torn, really usa!â They were all pretty meme-y options and most werenât bits that Tewi really know much about... Something about Astleyâs magnum opus just called to the bun though and it wasnât long before she came to her decision. âOkay, Never Gonna Give You Up! The Buddhists will have it stuck in their heads for weeks!â
She then spent a few moments in contemplation. âIâve got buns that can get the speakers in place easily enough. When do we setup the rest of it though? They still doing âearly to bed, wisdomâ nonsense at Myouren?â

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Sssh! She nappy.
âś
Perhaps of all the youkai in Gensokyo who have the ability to know shit, Wriggle might be the best. Tewi's loyal buns make a formidable information gathering force, but it pales in comparison to the sheer number of tiny spies that Wriggle has access to. Worse yet, they share a backyard, so most of the area of operations that Tewi prefers is basically always under surveillance.
Tewi knows this, Wriggle knows this... And Tewi hasn't found a good way to pay Wriggle off.
âś!
Once Tewi learned that Hriob had an allergy to rabbit fur (which she found genuinely horrifying as a concept) during their first less than dignified introduction, she immediately went to get a charm that would keep her bun-ness magically sealed. She never told the huge dude this piece of information.
It wasn't for purely altruistic reasons though... If Tewi ever wanted to sneak around when the big fey was around, it simply wouldn't do for him to sneeze whenever she got close.
âś with Komachi ofc
Komachi and Tewi met each other during the Phantasmagoria of Flower View incident and quickly found that their temperaments were a good match... Particularly after discovering that they each had hard-ass bosses. Tewi makes a special note to swing by the Sanzu river at least once or twice a week to kick back with Komachi.
As has been stated before as well, Tewi is also head-over-heels for Komachi's head petting. Maybe it's the shinigami's general isolation or a natural aptitude, but she just gets all the right places.
âś
After spending some time around Tewi, Rowan is one of the few who deduce her luck-based abilities without her spelling it out for him once he notices the dramatically increased drop chance. The bun respects that a great deal, but it also makes her very wary of the big man; she's had bad experiences with people that tried to take advantage of her abilities.

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*Chucks a âś at Tewi*
Tewi and Seiga both consider themselves to be the more elderly and wise of the duo, but as the more elderly and wise, they're both too polite to directly point that out. They egg each other on for grander and grander pranks... Eventually, this will blow up in their faces.
Send âś and Iâll write a headcanon about our muses