You just do it. You force yourself to get up. You force yourself to put one foot before the other, and God damn it, you refuse to let it get to you. You fight. You cry. You curse. Then you go about the business of living. That’s how I’ve done it. There’s no other way.”

the year of letting go, of understanding loss. grace. of the word ‘no’ and also being able to say ‘you are not kind’. the year of humanity/humility. when the whole world couldn’t get out of bed. everyone i’ve met this year, says the same thing ‘you are so easy to be around, how do you do that?’. the year i broke open and dug out all the rot with own hands. the year i learnt small talk. and how to smile at strangers. the year i understood that i am my best when i reach out and ask ‘do you want to be my friend?’. the year of sugar, everywhere. softness. sweetness. honey honey. the year of being alone, and learning how much i like it. the year of hugging people i don’t know, because i want to know them. the year i made peace and love, right here.

Some periods of our growth are so confusing that we don’t even recognize that growth is happening. We may feel hostile or angry or weepy and hysterical, or we may feel depressed. It would never occur to us, unless we stumbled on a book or a person who explained to us, that we were in fact in the process of change, of actually becoming larger, spiritually, than we were before. Whenever we grow, we tend to feel it, as a young seed must feel the weight and inertia of the earth as it seeks to break out of its shell on its way to becoming a plant. Often the feeling is anything but pleasant. But what is most unpleasant is the not knowing what is happening. Those long periods when something inside ourselves seems to be waiting, holding its breath, unsure about what the next step should be, eventually become the periods we wait for, for it is in those periods that we realize that we are being prepared for the next phase of our life and that, in all probability, a new level of the personality is about to be revealed.

The trouble with life isn’t that there is no answer, it’s that there are so many answers.

Somedays you will feel lonely lonely and empty and lost when you are far from alone and somedays you will be happy happy and excited and comfortable without another needing soul wrapped around yours around to remind you of your joy I must learn how to seek out love without feeling like I am crawling and begging for something I no longer deserve and I have to discover how to leave the love of others for a time without fearing I’ll never be allowed to return

Friendship, especially as you grow older, is not talking to each other everyday like it may have been. It’s knowing that when everything comes crumbling down at 3am, they’re right there with you on the other end of the line.

We often want it so badly that we ruin it before it begins. Overthinking. Fantasizing. Imagining. Expecting. Worrying. Doubting. Just let it naturally evolve.

Rejection doesn’t hurt, expectation does. Lying doesn’t kill, denial does. Forgetting doesn’t heal, forgiving does.

If you don’t find a way to love a flawed person, secretly you’re teaching yourself that you are not lovable because of your flaws.

People seem not to see that their opinion of the world is also a confession of character.