i fuckin love

listen man it’s not that i want to die or even that i feel particularly shit or depressed even like im fine???? everything is going gr8 and nothing bad has happened i couldnt even tell u what’s wrong but my buddy my pal my brain is just this constant stream of DO SOMETHING CLEAN UP TAKE A SHOWER VOMIT INTO YOUR BIN GO OUTSIDE GO FOR A RUN DONT STOP RUNNING COME HOME TAKE ANOTHER SHOWER STARE INTO SPACE FOR 8 MINUTES START CRYING AT NOTHING WATCH NETFLIX WRITE SOMETHING CRY SOME MORE DO SOME DRUGS GET DRUNK DO MORE DRUGS PICK AT YOUR SKIN REARRANGE THE HOUSE TEXT YOUR NANNA PLAN YOUR FUTUTE WHAT FUTURE THERE IS NO FUTURE DRUGS and my room is immaculate and my hands and feet and face are bleeding and i haven’t eaten a real meal with vegetables in weeks and i don’t remember the last time i was sober for a whole day and I’m just so alone yknow???