the hidden B

No matter what, you will be loved by every one coz your ruler is the moon and every one loves the Moon. Well.. You are a person who day dream a lot, you have very low-self confidence, you need back up for every move in your life, you are very much unpredictable. Means you do change according to time and circumstances, kind a selfish, have a very strong sense of musical, artistic talent, verbal communication.  Your attitudes are like the Moon, comes to gloom and fade away so everybody can expect changes in you. You can be a next Mahatma Gandhi who does peace love or you can be a Hitler who wants to destroy the man kind and peace (I mean in the community and your own home).  If you really have a deep thought about your own believe in God you can feel the difference which will make you stronger! Most of the time your words are a kind of would be happening true! So without any knowledge you can predict the situation. You will become poets, writers, any Artistic business people!  You are not strong in love, so you will be there and here till you get marry.. If U r a girl you will be a responsible woman in the whole family. If U r a man you will involve in fights & arguments in the family or Vice-versa. Means you will sacrifice your life for the goodness sake of Your family...You are gentle , intuitive with a broad vision, a power behind the scenes, well balanced People!!!  

 I'm not very good convincing myself that I'm sky high happy. Well I'd like to believe that I am, although I know that I should and I must 'cause there are so many reasons to be, but then I always complicate life.

I long master the act of *smile* I'm fine thank you. When in reality I am not fine, excuse me but I need to cry my heart out -- that's always the case, and as pathetic as it may sound but I'm so used to it. I tried to get rid of that old habit, but old habits don't die fast. It takes time and in some cases you can be stuck with it for all of your not so fairy tale kind of life. But mind you, I really tried my best to put a stop on it, but in the process of doing so, unconsciously I started to look for it and that un-explainable achy feeling is being missed by my poor little heart, and then it hit me, all of a sudden why do I care this much? it was never an issue before so what makes it a big deal now? easy. Because somebody made me do so, consider the person as an eye opener or something like that, but he perfectly made sense, that I am a human too and I meant to feel, to feel anything and to feel everything, whether I'm hurt or happy, I should deal with it and stop hiding, 'cause hiding only gets better when you can still endure the freakin pain. I tried to believe the person given that he lives a perfectly happy life, well, that 's how he appears to be. Only to find out that he's as selfish as I am. he too lives the way that I do, and what's worst is he didn't have the courage to say it right in front of my face, that he lives in his perfect world that is made of the most sturdy blocks of lies, typical, but not so shocking, I didn't see it coming tho. And thanks to that my eagerness to live the I'm fine thank you life sky rocketed.  

but then...  so what if I'm just putting a show to  someone, it doesn't mean that I'm completely lying to them,  well maybe I do, but why do they care anyway, it's not as if they can actually do something about it, It's always like that,and besides even thought I let them see it, I don't expect that they will react the way I want them to, so to avoid a new set of drama, I'd rather not show anyone, in that case I only have myself to blame.