Sebastian Hunt

“You do realize we’ve got a whole squad of kids around here, right? How many more siblings would you like? Pretty soon you’re gonna have to start sharing your room if we let anymore in.”

“Uh, yeah – I dunno if your dad would go for that.”

“Yeah but, I miss babies – I guess I can’t go back now though. Not really at least.”

“I mean, you could adopt another one?”

“Guess I should get used to it. Remember when you were little and cute? Good times. Good to know, really.”

“You really should mama. I kind of like it now though, so many fun things to do that I couldn’t do when I was younger.”

“Horses are gross, and you’re following close behind for sure. I’m 5′3, if you think I could actually break your arm, I must be tougher than I look. Plus, no – not really.”

“I’m an active teenage boy mama, of course I’m gross. Well I mean, I wouldn’t fight you.”

“Okay, one — chew with your mouth closed, I didn’t raise you in a barn. Two, I love you too but.. call me old again and your other arm might be broken.”

“I’m a horse, didn’t you know? You adopted a horse mama. You wouldn’t dare break my other arm... would you?”

“I might be cool but I’m not that cool. Don’t test your luck.”

“I love you mommy.”

“And old. In case you were wondering those are both a lie. You’re about to go do your homework in about five seconds.”

“Are they really a lie? Am I really about to go do that though?”

        “Isn’t that what they’re designed to do?”

“Yeah, but it doesn’t always work.”

“Pardon me?”

“I said you’re boring.”

“I did the laundry earlier, and got groceries. The rest your dad will just do when he gets home because he knows I’m adorable and he can’t say no to me.”

“Wow, old people can be so boring.”

“I almost considered doing Maddie’s homework for her earlier and I hate math, that’s how bored I am. I know and I don’t even have to try.”

“Don’t moms have things they do when they’re bored?”

“Dude, I’m off work today and I’m so bored. Give me a break. What would you do if I wasn’t a fun parent, you’d be losing it if dad and I were both hard headed. Yeah, see – I’m a genius. Make me a deal though, okay? At least half ass it so it looks like you tried.”

“So bored you’re encouraging your only son to half ass his homework? Wow mama, you’re amazing.”

“That’s so lame. Not that I agree with this but you could at least say  the storm traumatized you, making your injury feel ten times worse and you had a really had time concentrating on your work.”

“Not that you agree to this, really? Why are you helping me then? Shouldn’t you be telling me to do my homework? But, that might actually work.”

“Depends what you won’t be doing. You missed a couple days with that arm, but maybe I’ll let it slide if you come up with a better excuse than the nonexistent dog ate my homework when your teacher asks.”

“How about my real life actual ferret ate my homework?”