Band Geeks Unite

Some of the best times in orchestra are when the conductor gets distracted and starts telling ridiculous stories… Here’s one of them as a response to one of the oboists in youth orchestra spending all her time scraping her reeds during a tacet movement of Scheherazade:

There was an oboist in a professional orchestra who had a habit of scraping his reeds up until one bar before he had to play during rehearsal, only just managing to get his instrument up in time to play. The guest conductor was getting extremely annoyed and made a point of shouting at the oboist to stop.

Then in the dress rehearsal, once again the oboist was scraping reeds during his rests. The time for his solo was coming up soon… The conductor looks up to try and cue the oboist and he’s still scraping his reeds. And then at the very final second, the oboist slams the knife he was using to scrape his reed into his leg and starts playing. 

The conductor faints.

person : why r u crying?

me : * sobs * i. just. love. music.