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a story in three parts

ty for inspo poms @hollivens ily | more phan doodles here

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j-sketch

#tadc

beeshibe

my mom just came to me and ranted about how everyone is making this facebook status that says, “raising teenagers is like nailing jello to a tree”. she was so baffled by this because she said, “you were pretty easy to raise as teenagers. all you did was sleep and eat.”

so to prove some point she’s going to nail a small cup of jello to a tree.

beeshibe

she’s so pleased with her self

incredible

parents are weird

voidbat

yeah but this is about as accurate as it gets.

you say “nail jello to a tree” and most people think jello all by itself.

but if you put any actual thought into what you’re doing and then give it just a little support

well gosh. look what happens.

please tell your mom good job.

margaretssmallworld

also love how the original metaphor of “nailing jello to a tree” is about trying to force your bizarre and arbitrary will on something that is categorically disinclined to do such a thing, for no conceivable reason.

#human rights

purpurussy

it's like the interviewer prepared a bunch of questions and dnp prepared a bunch of answers but the answers and the questions belong to 2 completely different conversations

purpurussy

so this is literally what happened

#dan and phil

diphowell

dan.exe has stopped working

#dan and phil

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pseudophan

every time dan and phil mention how scared they were to accidentally say or do something gay and hashtag phan proof esque before the hard launch i just. like. ok first of all that obviously must have been really stressful and i'm sorry they had to live with that for so long but. the way they say it tends to have this vibe of "thankfully it was ultimately fine and we didn't do that but still now we don't have to worry anymore" and i'm just like. guys. are we supposed to just act like you didn't do exactly that about ten thousand different times because like we can pretend if you want but

#dan and phil

diphowell

play hungry eyes by eric carmen

#dan and phil

ashlettuce

dinof sightings in 2026

#dan and phil #dani snot

twistedhoneycomb

can't you come back?

#tadc

flickypic

Buck & Doe, A literal Funnybunny au because they’re quick and easy to draw and I love watership down. 😂

#tadc

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my-name-is-unimportant

Bunnies!

Inspired by This post by @flickypic which has made me feel better after the crappy week I've had.

Not sure I'll do final lines or colours yet. Lemme know what you all think!

Part 2 of New Memories will be out soon(ish) now that I'm working again.

#tadc

identitty-dickruption

okay I’ll say it nicer:

australia was colonised according to the myth of terra nullius (or empty land). ever since the very early days of colonialism, the land has been framed as something untameable and unliveable. this has justified acts of violence against the first peoples here, in that they are seen as non-people. it has justified the destruction of sacred land in the goal of making australia look more european. (an example: our capital city contains a man-made lake that is now nothing better than a fetid carp pond. it’s disgusting and unnatural). basically, the idea of “taming australia’ has justified endless harm

“everything in australia is weird and dangerous” is not just some silly meme phrase, it is something that arcs back to the very beginning of white settlers laying claim to ‘australia’. and personally I am very sick of seeing it thrown around like it means nothing

headspace-hotel

Can't wait for people to stop joking about how all the wildlife in australia is scary and deadly...

sqbr

Yeah and like... I think there is space to talk about the ways Australia is relatively unique or at least different to other places: our snakes and spiders are more dangerous than anyone else's, but our native bees and 'bears' are safer. You might die of sunstroke but you won't die in a blizzard, earthquake, or tornado.

Australia is not especially dangerous, or unfriendly, it's just 'different', but then the question is different to what. Why should deadly earthquakes and forests full of murderous bears be seen as more normal? Why is a desert any more weird or scary than a bog or tundra? Why are cold damp places seen as the only form of natural beauty, why do people see warm dry places as dead when they are full of life, and see warm damp places as full of TOO MUCH life somehow? Why, even in Australia, do we use the aesthetics of red October leaves and Christmas snow, and not celebrations of the beautiful seasonal changes we actually see all around us? Why are white Australians so actively hostile to engaging and connecting with the local cultures that have been celebrating and working with the place we live for thousands of years, and even after hundreds of years still see our home as Strange?

phlebasphoenician

Historians are looking into the possibility that the first Australians practised forms of agriculture and aquaculture, writes Cathy Pryor.

Yes, let's definitely have a conversation about why the European colonists were invested in the belief that the indigenous people didn't cultivate the land.

sqbr

YEAH, THAT TOO. It's important to remember that the way Indigenous Australians were and are treated would be just as unjustified if they were all hunter gatherers. But they were not, and that lie has been spread for a reason.

Also I read through the replies and people point out that exactly the same sort of exotification into a Dangerous Alien Landscape Which Must Be Tamed happens with Africa, Asia, The Middle East etc. Even like... Scotland and Italy, back in the day. And for similar reasons. And this kind of imagery is everywhere, like play any video game with multiple biomes or cultures etc (real or fictional) and see which ones are treated as Normal and which ones are Weird and Scary/Exotic.

liz-squids

"The Australian landscape is alien and mysterious and will kill you" has been a trope since the very first white people looked at this continent, and it's tiring.

Save me hyperpop

tally-art-deactivated20201005

Only the subtlest metaphors on this Tumblr.

pastel-hutt-deactivated20180115

This works as a metaphor for children but also it works perfectly well when played totally straight because horse people are actually like this

rider-waite-blog

it literally took me three solid readings through this to realize that it wasn’t necessarily about horse people, because they are exactly like this

#human rights

estchiyu

ribbit comes back from the dead 🧟

#tadc

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ikimaru

when you leave for 30 minutes and all you friends turn emo

#tadc

spontaneousmusicalnumber

A frustrating part of the mainstream vegan “love all animals and protect the environment” mindset is the fact that things need to die in real-life ecology all the time but deer hunting season makes icky feelings and carp culls aren’t cottagecore

spontaneousmusicalnumber

The vegan “any animal death ever is morally wrong” mindset doesn’t hold up when:

We don’t have any of the large predators we used to (black bears, mountain lions, or gray wolves) but still retain large deer populations. If nothing is removing animals, they’ll quickly overload the carrying capacity of the environment and have massive losses to starvation and disease that can also pass on to livestock. Human hunters replace the large predators that our landscape can no longer support.

It’s kinder to euthanize an un-releasable hawk rather than try to find it a permanent home with humans. Wildlife rehabs have extremely limited space and resources and are usually run entirely on donated money and volunteer time. Only a few are large and stable enough to care for permanent residents long-term, and those spots are few and far between.

An invasive species poses a danger to threatened native wildlife. I will admit- Australian possums are adorable. But not in New Zealand, where they’re an invasive species that eats the eggs of ground-dwelling birds that previously had no such predators. The landowners I worked with replanting native bush, all native Maori, had no qualms about setting the dogs on them.

I don’t know how to end this except. Sometimes things just gotta die and acting otherwise just isn’t a realistic expectation.

spontaneousmusicalnumber

Highlights from the notes over the past 6 months include a lot of angry vegans saying “you’re blowing things out of proportion, no vegans actually think like this!” and a lot of people who work in conservation and education saying “Every day. I have to fight people who think like this.”

As a bonus this post was originally inspired by the vegan who called me racist for saying we should kill invasive species

#human rights

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