idk how long this post will be tbh, but i was feeling triggered all day from an anon's ask because they were manifesting the same things i decided for myself, doing the same projects i am in my DR. instead of forcing myself to get over the trigger immediately, i put my attention on calming my body down first, because no mechanics or anything that you know will make sense to a nervous system that is actively screaming even when there's no real threat. even if you consciously know emotions don't matter, your nervous system won't get that in the moment, and personally affirming until my brain is fried when i'm having a panic attack doesn't make things better for me. if affirming over panic works for you, by all means do it, but if you're like me and it makes you feel worse, focus on making your nervous system feel safe again just for this moment. take deep, slow breaths, affirm generic umbrella affirmations that make you feel better instead of specific affirmations, such as "everything always works out for me", "i am safe in my body", "my manifestations are safe", "everything is okay", your nervous system will inevitably listen. take a nap, talk to someone, doodle, write, move your body, listen to music, make sure that adrenaline is out there and gone from your body.
now that's out of the way, i wanted to discuss a shift of perspective or mindset. if you guys watch erik on youtube (power of i am), he often says to create an alter ego and identify with it, you'll become it and then your reality will reflect things that alter ego would normally experience. so i talked to myself, and my alter ego's name is juliette. she is an actress, model, and influencer. she's incredibly successful, has everyone she wants wrapped around her finger, wealthy, beautiful, playing her dream roles, having brands fight over her, even has the literal king of pop on his knees for her? but how does she have all this? because she knows who she is.
she thinks of herself as the queen of the acting industry. she thinks of herself as the kind of actress that companies BEG to have in their movies, because she knows she has so much influence and aura she can easily make a company succeed just with her mere presence. she knows she is unmatched, that no one could be better than her or come on her level.
now the next thing is how does she approach her desires, or if something is going in a way she doesn't like, what does she do? she for starters, doesn't freak tf out and beg her 3d to change. let's say she's shooting for a movie, but the directors want her to film a scene that she doesn't want to. she obviously doesn't like this, but knowing who the fuck she is, the woman that everyone literally crumbles under, she says no. and she's not afraid. if the directors threaten to fire her from the movie, she's not afraid. because she knows she wins anyway, she always has the last laugh no matter what anyone might try. even if the directors do fire her, she doesn't give a shit, because she knows she'll get what she wants (whether that's being back in her role, getting justice, or getting into an even bigger and better role where she's treated better because her desired outcome ALWAYS finds a way to her, ultimately she decides what outcome she wants and she knows it has no choice but to come to her). lo and behold, what she wants happens.
i tried to think of some other examples. take an empress for example - a powerful woman who controls entire kingdoms, a whole empire, much more powerful than a queen. let's say she wants a specific kingdom (lets call it crystal kingdom i'm feeling fantasy vibes) to give her 10M bars of gold. she tells her advisors and council, from knowing who she is: someone in charge. someone who gets what she wants because she is in charge. her council doubts her, share glances with each other, think their empress is crazy, they ask her "are you sure, your highness?" and again from knowing who she is, she unashamedly says yes. they start moving. the word is delivered to crystal kingdom that the empress wants 10M bars of gold. so, movement is happening. but does the empress care about movement? no tf she doesn't, all she cares about is the end which is having those 10M bars of gold in her hands. maybe circumstances happen: the leader of crystal kingdom says he doesn't have enough bars of gold, the advisor comes up to the queen and says "your highness, it's not possible", "your highness, they can't do it", "your highness, it's better you ask another kingdom, or ask for anything else, for a smaller amount" sound familiar? do you think the empress, the literal boss of all these kingdoms, is going to settle for that? do you think she's going to say "hmm yeah you're right maybe i'll ask for silver instead. or maybe i'll ask for 1K bars of gold instead" HELL NO, SHE'S THE EMPRESS, SHE CONTROLS THIS SHIT. so she stares at her advisor square in the eye and says "i don't give two flying fucks: i want 10M bars from crystal kingdom, and 10M bars from crystal kingdom i am getting". why is she getting 10M bars of gold from crystal kingdom? because she knows those 10M bars of gold are HERS, and belong to HER. she doesn't give a shit who has to break their leg or move to another country, she doesn't give a shit if 8 billion people have to move to fucking saturn, she doesn't give a shit about any of it - all she does give a shit about is having those 10M bars of gold from crystal kingdom. (persistence), and because she didn't back tf down even when her advisor told her to, they all scrambled, ran around, and had to find ways to get the empress her gold. and now she has them in her hands, tangibly.
want a third example? this one isn't made up: it's quite literally the story of an actual character, it's none other than the iconic daenerys targaryen. she was controlled, abused, and used by the men around her including her own brother. she has terrible circumstances, like being married to a man she doesn't want. but daenerys isn't a victim to her circumstances like other people: she realizes who she is and makes use of her current circumstances. she might not be able to teleport away from the dothraki at this very moment, but she plays it smart. knowing who she is, she wins their support. she wins her husband's support. she stands up against her brother. her brother and husband die, but again, knowing who she is, she does what no other khaleesi has done: rule the dothraki tribe herself without needing a man by her side. other tribes oppose her, spit at her name, use her gender against her, take the dothraki less seriously, but she refuses to be a victim of misogyny, because she has faith in self which always remains undefeated.
she has something she wants. oh look, a desire! her desire is for her dragon eggs to hatch, free all slaves from slaver's bay in essos, reclaim the iron throne and rule the seven kingdoms. she knows this is her mission, that she was meant to carry out these campaigns. again, she knows who she is. so every move she makes is from that identity. she's a khaleesi, a queen, mother of dragons, already proclaiming herself as the ruler of the seven kingdoms and holder of the iron throne even though she's nowhere near it physically. thus because she actually knows who she is, she knows her desired end is inevitable.
she has an advisor named jorah. this advisor of hers is very grounded and realistic. since the beginning, he tells her that nobody has seen dragons in hundreds or thousands of years, that her dragon eggs are just stone and will never hatch. he doubts her, albeit watching her do exactly what he's afraid of. she has no fear, but he does. he plays the practical guy in her life - looking out for her, saying "hey, maybe you shouldn't do this, just to be safe". eventually, the dragon eggs hatch. jorah witnesses the baby dragons on daenerys' shoulder firsthand, and drops to his knees, accepting her as special and as the mother of dragons. however, this doesn't mean he gives up. it's his nature to be grounded and realistic. he still pipes up sometimes. he still doubts his queen, he still thinks she's being reckless. when the dragons are fighting over food and daenerys reaches out to calm them, one of them hisses/roars at her, then flies off. jorah sees this and tells her "they are dragons, no one can tame them, not even their mother". sounds awfully like someone you know, doesn't it?
daenerys doesn't lash out, she just shoots him a glare, and knows what he's saying is nonsense because she knows she is the mother of dragons. even though jorah is witnessing daenerys' manifestation unfold, it's his literal nature to be realistic, so of course at any given moment he will have something to say. daenerys understands this and doesn't fight him, but she has more faith in herself than in him.
there are many other powerful leaders that are all in this game for the throne (hah title drop). all of them want the iron throne. all of them want to rule the seven kingdoms. but daenerys is not intimidated. other leaders can try. they can fight, they can kill, but she knows what's hers stays hers. she knows they can compete, but in her reality that competition is meaningless if the iron throne and seven kingdoms are already her birthright. she doesn't freak out. she doesn't start panicking and think "omg i should give up, there are so many other powerful and unique leaders all wanting the throne, i might not get it, i should just give up" NO. she stated the throne and kingdoms are hers. she knows she was meant to have them, so she keeps fucking moving forward no matter what she sees, hears, feels, thinks. no matter who's doubting her. no matter who's trying to make it difficult for her. daenerys doesn't give a shit who has to die in order for her to get the throne - all she cares about is the fact the throne belongs to her as well as the seven kingdoms.
and eventually, she gets to physically place her hand on the throne. despite jon snow challenging her at one point, she says it straight to his face: "i was meant to rule the seven kingdoms, and i will". she has no fear because she knows who she is and what she already has.
so can you see something common in all of these? they know who they are, they know what they have. and because they know who they are, everything stems from that. it all stems from your identity. a top actress doesn't have to worry about not getting her dream role because that's not even a possibility for her: she's a top actress that all companies want so badly of COURSE she would get her dream role. if something doesn't go the way she likes? she doesn't care, she's a top actress. she owns the acting industry, one way or another these directors will bend backwards for her or she'll get whatever else it is that she wants. the empress doesn't care what her advisor is telling her, she's getting those 10M bars of gold from crystal kingdom because she said so. daenerys doesn't give a shit what has to happen, who has to move, who has to doubt her, who has to try and make her life hell for her because no matter what, the throne and kingdoms are HERS. do they have emotions? do they feel sad, depressed, have moments of anxiety, anger? oh absolutely - at the end of the day they are humans. but daenerys does not stop being a ruler just because she had an anxiety attack. the empress does not stop being the one in charge just because she was pissed. the actress does not stop being powerful, and being someone who always gets what she wants just because she cried. they are all rooted in their identities, and knowing that what they want is theirs, and they don't give 2 flying fucks what has to happen in order for that thing to be in front of their eyes. if they want it, they got it.
you are no different. you thinking you're different makes you different.
you don't need to FEEL anything. you don't have to feel like a conqueror who has to burn the world down. you don't have to have an ignited fire in your chest - you just need to know who the fuck you are and what the fuck is in your possession.
say it with me: if i want it, i'm getting it. if i want it, i'm getting it. if i want it, i'm getting it, BECAUSE IT IS ALREADY FUCKING MINE.
signed, juliette ferrars of sector 45 / the mother of realities.
