Punished Sheepdog

👑 kingofengland

questing literally sucks. i miss my wife

🛡️lance.du.lac

me too :(

👑 kingofengland

??????

54,467 notes

🔑seneschal-kay

PLEASE stop signing up for tournaments under fake names. im so serious. if we get any more of these we are literally going to call off the games this upcoming whitsuntide. and this includes lancelot. there are no exceptions. i will throw you out if you give me a fake name. i don’t care who your dad is. i will kill you

🕶️fair.unknown Follow

hi

🔑seneschal-kay

BITES YOU BITES YOU BITES YOU

527 notes

🧪 tristan-from-cornwall

lancelot i know this is you

#your obsession with me is getting embarrassing #also she is literally also named iseult so i dont see what the problem is

13 notes

🧥la-cote-male-taile

wait guys im actually really confused about sir mordred lmao. is he arthur’s nephew or his son

🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿queen.morgause.70 Follow

tbh not sure you’re going to love the answer to this one

34,563 notes

🛡️lance.du.lac

hey guys! just an update since i know i’ve been gone for a while! i’ve just been taking some time to myself just to relax in the woods and i feel a lot better now. i’m done being insane and on my way back to camelot :)

🛡️lance.du.lac

insane again

52 notes

🧚‍♀️morgan-le-fae

#tbh cape that sets people on fire is a favorite of mine #but also the gwencelot stuff is pissing me off #especially because lancelot keeps vagueblogging about it #as if everyone doesnt know what’s going on

700 notes

💅mrs-bisclavret Follow

.

#personal #my husband has been missing for like 2 days and i think he is cheating on me #i havent really wanted to come to terms with this because it just sucks but i dont really know what other explanation there could be #:(

3 notes

🏹werewolftracker Follow

spotted on west grounds of camelot castle 03:47 4/26/1066

(submitted by @ bedivere77)

👑kingofengland

anyone want to go hunt this with me??

#have been having kind of a rough week but maybe hunting will lift my spirits #also a package just arrived for me so thats exciting!!!!

8 notes

❤️queen.guinevere

just so you guys all know, there is someone sending people random anons pretending to be me but it’s not me who sent it!! so if you get anything weird that seems like it's from me in the next few days it's probably not. sorry and i hope this gets figured out soon!!

💔false.guinevere

>:)

❤️queen.guinevere

wtf

124 notes

🪓oldest.orkney.gawain Follow

does anyone else think beaumains or whatever his name is looks super familiar

🛡️lance.du.lac

dude i think he's your brother

🪓oldest.orkney.gawain Follow

ohhhh yeah that would actually make so much sense. on an unrelated note does anyone think fair unknown looks super familiar

642 notes

🎭dinadan-the-knight Follow

courtly love is actually such a joke. the queen does not care about you lmfao. get a life

👑kingofengland

:(

🎭dinadan-the-knight Follow

i am so sorry my lord this post was not about you

140,965 notes

🗡️per.ce.val

on the grail quest and i think galahad just died???

🐗sir-bors

on the bright side we did find the grail!

72,456 notes

FABIO: silver rod? oh….

*fabio dissappears into his grotto and rummages around in his back room. he is gone for quite some time and hasn’t offered you anything to eat or drink, so you just stand around in his home feeling really awkward. what if he lives with relatives and they come out and say something to you?*

*as you approach the tower, a metal face peeks around the corner*

KNIGHT DOOGLE: ah! my helmet! i needed that to protect my head from attacks! why did you do that?

KNIGHT DOOGLE: huh? oh, thank you, that’s very sweet. but you didn’t have to just take off my helmet like that, you could have asked first. i feel so embarrased now. *doogle shuffles back to his tower like a sad sneaking tree, and then returns, armed with a spear*

*a round of applause and cheering is heard*

HINT MOUSE: *in a little squeaky voice* ahem ahem… it is me, a mouse am i! i only tell truths and i never lie! reliable, helpful, and handsome to boot! for all of your labour, i am the fruit!

HINT MOUSE: thank you, i really appreciate the support. i will happily come and visit fabio with you…oh, sorry, hang on.

*hint mouse clears his throat*

HINT MOUSE: i’m always here for you, that’s my motto. so i shall accompany you to fabio’s grotto! you’ve supported me in all my life choices you’re a lifelong friend to all little…moices!

HINT MOUSE: *gets fabios attention by briefly playing on a tiny flute*

the room is silent. hint mouse owns the stage now.

HINT MOUSE: you’ve assembled yourself quite a collection! but i have arrived to give you affection. your riches are piled right up to the cieling but deep down i know you suffer with a feeling. (feels awkward but…i can keep going! everyone believes in me!) you’re cooped up in here and you’re all alone just yourself, a rod, and an old wooden throne it doesn’t have to be that way, you don’t have to be bleak let me introduce myself, i’m hint mouse, squeak squeak! in exchange for the rod, i’ll be your best friend a little yellow creature who you can always depend! *applause is heard yet again, the crowd is going hog wild.*

*fabio takes a gentle tumble down his tower of riches and cradles hint mouse in his arms*

FABIO: hint mouse…that was beautiful. you’d do all that just to help an old man? you’re truly the best treasure i could ever ask for, i’ll cherish our friendship forever…

FABIO: thank you so much all of you. i have no need for material goods anymore. the silver rod is yours to take!

*as you walk towards malice bridge, doogle turns to you.*

KNIGHT DOOGLE: sorry i didn’t say or do much back there…what happened was really beautiful though.

*knight doogle stops and thinks for a second, his ears and hair sway in the breeze and it looks so cool*

KNIGHT DOOGLE: i’ve spent my whole adult life just guarding my tower selfishly, but people like hint mouse do so much to help others. once this is over i’m going to change my lifestyle, i’ll give up the knight life.

*you enjoy the rest of your walk with doogle, and eventually arrive at malice bridge, which despite the name, is actually pretty ordinary. at the other end of the bridge, light from the surface trickles down, the way out.*

*suddenly, the air around you grows cold, a shiver travels up your spine, and a giant shimmering monster appears out of nowhere*

SILVER GUARDIAN: MY FINGER! MY PRECIOUS DIGIT! OH…I LOST IT BECAUSE I WAS POKING AROUND IN MOUSE HOLES LOOKING FOR HINT MOUSE, BUT A LESS HELPFUL MOUSE STOLE IT…

*the silver guardian reattaches its finger, which is gross, so you look away while it does that*

SILVER GUARDIAN: NOW HUMAN….ARE YOU READY TO LEARN THE TRUE PURPOSE OF THE SILVER ROD?

*you tremble as the silver guardian does some really confusing poses with its hand, not entirely sure where it’s going with this.*

SILVER GUARDIAN: HEH HEH HEH….TO CROSS THE BRIDGE YOU GO IN THIS DIRECTION!!!!

*as you cross the bridge to the outside world, the rocky walls of the dungeon give way to fields and forests.at the middle of the bridge, you turn back, and all of your friends are there, and now they are all friends with each other all thanks to you.*