b

Garrett Graham was the star hockey player at Briar, and your year long friend with benefits. Every few days, you’d sneak into to Garrett’s room or him into yours where frustrations were taken out, followed by breakdowns of the week tangled in the sheets and with each other.

Garrett is a great friend, he just comes with benefits. He’s always kind in class and when at parties, he’d always say hi to you and make you feel seen. You’d cheer him on at games and follow him to wherever the after party was to have great drunk sex after a win or lazy hammered sex after a loss. He was always there to celebrate you and make you feel good.

You just didn’t know how he would react to the news you had to tell him.

“Fuck!” You exclaim in a sob, holding the multiple different tests in your fist. “No, fuck!”

“Y/N?” You hear your roommates and can’t move, your sobs shaking your ribcage and fear freezing you to the tilted bathroom floor. “If you’re naked we’re still coming in, just warn us.”

You didn’t answer, jaw numb and clattering from the crying and anxiety. Your whole world, future, life, just flipped entirely upside down. “Y/N! What the hell is happening?” Hannah and Allie sit on either side of you, Allie noticing the tests first.

“Oh, sweet pea..” She trails off as she pulls the tests from your grip. You fall into Hannah, who's looking at Allie with widened eyes. Allie shrugs and gives her a look. "Y/N, do you know.."

"Who else!" You exclaim with another sob and the two jump at your sudden outburst. Allie puts the tests down and lays on top of you, sandwiching you between her and Hannah. "I'm so scared. I can't do this, he's not going to want this, right? He's right there in hockey, this would ruin everything for him."

Allie quickly sits back. "Stop worrying about him. You're who matters right now. What do you want to do?" She grips your hand and you blink your eyes open, looking at your friend scolding you with love. "He doesn't matter right now. What you choose, we will be here for you."

"Thank you," you shake. "I.. I don't want to quit school, I could do classes from my laptop when it gets hard to walk. Maybe you guys could help, if you want, you don't-"

"Are you kidding?! We're going to be Aunts!" Hannah shakes your shoulders and Allie squeals, sandwiching you again, and you smile for the first time since seeing the tests. "You know, you have a while until you show. I mean, you have to tell Garrett. You can't keep this from him but we can help you!"

You nod and groan, throwing your head back. "I forgot about him for a minute."

"Good, he's not the one growing a baby. I just got a great idea - I'm going to write some songs for your baby. Maybe cover some lullabies too." Hannah smiles and pushes her nose into your cheek. "We got you, Y/N. We're not going anywhere."

"I love you guys." You wrap your arms around them and they wrap their arms around too, a big hug on the bathroom floor.

You sit in Ethics a few rows behind Garrett, and every time he turns to the side to talk to Beau you catch a glimpse of his features. At one point he turns enough to see you and flashes a smile and your whole body feels warm.

You give a closed mouth smile back and look at your paper, trying to hold your tears in. Your stomach starts to churn and you jump, holding your chest and mouth. “Y/N?”

You shake your head quickly and bolt for the bathroom, the slam of the door catching a few people’s attention, including Garrett’s. He knits his eyebrows at Hannah racing after you.

“You okay?” Beau asks and Garrett looks back at his friend nodding.

“Yeah, sorry. What did you say?”

Hannah finds you in the closest bathroom on the floor in the last stall. “I thought this might happen. So I made an emergency kit.” She pulls out a small pink and blue tie dyed makeup bag with anti-nausea meds, snacks, a toothbrush and toothpaste, and mouthwash.

“Will you marry me?” You sigh and she laughs, giving you a big hug. “Class is over in like five minutes. Can you just grab my stuff for me? I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be sorry! I’ll be back in a few minutes. Just stay here and when you’re ready, put those pills to work.”

Hannah leaves the stall and you lock it again, closing your eyes and breathing slow. It’s been 3 weeks since you found out and your stomach has just barely poked out. You missed 2 parties already giving the excuse that you needed to study and weren’t feeling well.

You hear conversations and footsteps, and the bathroom door opens again. “It’s me, it’s me!” Hannah slides your stuff under the stall and you open the door, taking one of the pills and sipping your water. "Garrett asked where you were, I said you had to take a call really quick. Have you thought about telling him? No pressure, just.." her sentence trails off when she sees your look and nods, helping you off the floor.

"I've heard this part sucks, and they're right. I think I might skip my last two and go lay down." You stop at the sink and brush your teeth quickly, thanking Hannah again for the kind gesture. You put the bag in your backpack and open the bathroom door.

"Do you want me to grab anything? Crackers, ginger ale? I'll let you borrow my computer," Hannah offers and you feel a hand grab your shoulder. You freeze at the familiar cologne and turn, Garrett's pupils wide and hand squeezing the strap of his backpack nervously.

"Are you okay, are you sick? I heard Hannah offer the best remedies for a stomach ache. Can I do anything for you?" You open your mouth to speak but nothing comes out, your eyes flickering between his.

"Uh, she ate too many hot cheetos last night and mixed it with candy, not a good combo. She'll see you later," Hannah rushes and links your arms and scurries away from Garrett. "Holy shit that was close, I think I did okay, right?"

"Yes, I'm sorry, Hannah. I shouldn't have put you through that, I should just tell him." You stop and go to turn, Hannah grabbing your shoulders and pulling you under a tree near no one.

"You shouldn't tell him because I had to lie for you. Allie and I told you, whenever and whatever you decide, we're here for you. Whenever you're ready." You hug her tight and she rubs your back, the two of you not noticing Garrett lingering on the sidewalk.

You did exactly what you said and take Hannah up on her offer, laying in your bed with her laptop playing 'Dirty Dancing' with your second sleeve of Saltines cradled in your elbow, first can of ginger ale on the nightstand.

You eat another cracker and lay back down, draping your arm on your stomach. Your eyes waver from the screen and focus on the polaroids you took of you and Garrett, Garrett and the team, you and the team.

Would they like having a baby around? Would they be mad this disturbed their season? Would they never speak to me again?

You didn't realize you're crying until you hear a knock on the door. You pause the movie and wipe your eyes, pulling yourself off the bed and to the door. Garrett stands with a small bouquet of your favorite flowers and a shopping bag.

"I figured you'd be here if you weren't feeling good. I got some chicken noodle soup from downstairs, and some of your favorites, when you can handle it," he chuckles and you blink, smiling up at him.

"I don't remember this being part of the deal, Garrett, but thank you," you hum and take the bag from him, peeking at your favorite sweets and chips in the bag.

"It's the friend part," he mumbles and your cheeks warm up. "Enjoy it, and enjoy your movie for the billionth time," he teases and you push his chest playfully.

"Thank you." You give him a hug around his chest and he squeezes you back, kissing the top of your head. "I will be eating like, everything in this bag once I'm better."

Garrett walks backwards from your door. "I know, that's why I got them. I’ll text you later, Corazón.”

He turns and you take a step forward. “Garrett!”

He spins back toward you quickly. “Yeah?” He steps closer.

The words won’t come out. You beg your throat to open. Your lips fight to move. Instead, you grab his shoulder and kiss him quickly. “Thank you for this, I really appreciate it.”

His hand rubs a thumb over your waist, resting his forehead on yours. “You drive me crazy. I miss you,” he breathes, kissing your jaw and you smile, eyes fluttering. His hands push under your shirt and you jump away. “Sorry, did I do something wrong?”

“No, I’m sorry. My head is everywhere, I’m not feeling like myself lately. I’m sorry,” you sigh and he shakes his curls.

“Don’t worry about it. Feel better, okay?” You nod and he squeezes your bicep, walking out of sight. You drop your shoulders and sulk back into your room, slamming the door behind you and plopping down on your bed.

You open the bag with a smile, grabbing your favorite chips and sitting back against the headboard. You hit play on the movie and grab your phone to take a picture with the chips. You send it to Garrett with “feeling much better. Thank you again”

He replied back in less than a minute.

Garrett: Anything for you. Feel better, I’ll check on you soon.

Just for a split second you forgot the secret you were keeping, and when you remembered, the chips didn’t seem very appetizing.

“10 weeks, how’d the OB go?” Ally checks out the sonogram with a hazy smile.

“Good, said baby is healthy and moving along perfectly since the last one. Gave me some pamphlets to read through, to add to the hours of research I’m doing.”

It was getting colder so wearing baggy sweaters and sweatshirts didn’t seem so out of place. Your stomach was poking out more than before, and you know it will be soon before you can’t hide it anymore.

“I think I’m going to do it today.” You bite your lip and Allie looks at you.

“Okay, what do you need from me right now. Advice, a hug, to go with you?” You shake your head with a smile.

“No, thank you. I think knowing we’re in the clear helped me be calm. I think he’ll be happy, and if not, I know who I can count on.”

Allie coos and hugs you again, kissing your cheek. “Can I ask when and where? I won’t follow, don’t worry, I’m just so excited and nervous for you.”

“I know he likes to go to the rink after hours by himself, so I’m hoping to catch him there. If not I’ll call him here. I can’t do it with others around.” Allie nods and squeals, hugging you again.

"I'm so proud of you. I'll be here if you need me, I'll come running and kick ass if I need to," Allie promises and you laugh.

"I know, thank you." You take a deep breath and tap your zipped-up jacket pocket, double checking the sonogram and test is still there. "Alright, I'll text you, love you!" You shout walking out the door.

"Love you so much!"

October became chilly quickly, making your nose itch but the colors bleed together in the trees and the cold didn't matter that much anymore. The sign for the arena comes into view and you start to grow more nervous.

"I can do this, no worries. It's just me and him," you whisper to yourself. “And our baby too.” You open the doors to the arena and see the big number 44 on the ice, skating and shooting the puck.

You head down to the team box, sitting on the bench and leaning over the door to rest your chin on your hands and watch him. He still hasn't noticed you as he continues to skate around the ice and shoot.

He shoots the last puck in and lets out an exhausted sigh and throws his head back. You sit up and stand, Garrett ripping off his helmet to free his wet curls.

"Hey, what are you doing here?" He shakes his hair free of sweat before skating over to you and hitting the wall. He towers over you as he kisses you softly, gloved hands holding your waist. "This was a nice surprise, I thought we were keeping it quiet?"

"Oh please, Allie and Hannah have known for a while they put the pieces together." Your hands hold his elbows and he pulls off his gloves, holding your waist. "I came to talk to you, actually."

He backs up a little bit. "I'm not in trouble right?"

You suck a breath through your teeth, stuffing your hands in your pockets. "We might be in some, for a while. Not with each other, I mean figuring it out."

"Okay, now you're scaring me. What is going on?" His smile drops with eyebrows knitting. You lick your lips and inhale with a slow exhale, pulling out the pictures and a test. A small gasp comes from his throat with a trembling jaw, eyes filling with tears as he stares.

Garrett's index finger traces the small white figure in the picture where the arrow points, moving his vision to the test. "It says the word."

"I know," you sob and tears stream down his face. "I'm 10 weeks today. Baby is healthy. I waited to tell you because I wanted to be sure everything was good and I was scared you'd be mad-"

"Mad?!" He kicks open the door to the bench and scoops you up, spinning you in a circle onto the ice. You hold onto his shoulder pads tightly and laugh, the pictures flowing behind you. "Am I scared? Yes." He puts you down and holds your face, the sonogram and test still in hand. "But, I am so excited. A baby? A mini me and you?" His voice trembles and tears flow again. "I am so happy."

You chuckle out a cry and kiss him hard, salty tears falling between your mouths when you smile into them. He kisses your smile and cheeks, pulling off his gear and throwing it on the ice.

"You're sweaty!" You squeal and he pulls you closer, spinning you again. You wrap your arms tight around his neck and embrace his warmth, closing your eyes and squeezing when you feel him shake.

“I swear, and promise to you both now,” he starts and pulls away slightly, resting a palm on your stomach, “that I will always be there to protect you and will never do anything to hurt you two. Whatever you two need, I’ll do everything I can to get it.”

“I think right now, this is all I need,” you hum with a smile, Garrett leaning down to kiss you softly.