avianc

you will wake up and the sun shining through the window will feel like a personal insult directed towards no one but you, you will blink and stare at its bright beams while the world buzzes to life somewhere in the background; you will weep before you feel its warmth and you will be so angry, so angry at the world and the sun and everything around you because here you are, breathing melancholy when all the sun has over done is shine. it shines today while you weep and it will shine tomorrow when your eyes are dry, because even if you did not ask for this, the sun will shine and you will sit there and feel its warmth because if it’s not for you, then who does it shine for?

you want to beg, to plead, to chase like a dog, to be worth something, anything, to have someone offer to lay you bare, strip you off all you’ve ever known and sing you cruel praises while you pray in the tones of a miscreant