no mourners. no funerals

literally every problem i've had in my adult life has been solved by open and honest communication. which is fucking stupid, first of all

what doesn't kill you makes you stay on tumblr for 13 years and counting

why is it so hot. why is it so hot. I am being punished.

Date idea: I lie face down on your bed and you pet my head for maybe 2 or 3 hours.

best m/f dynamic is a flamboyant bisexual show-off desperately in love with an extremely practical girl who’s difficult to impress 🤩

"I wish we met sooner" is such a gentle sentiment. I love you so much I not only want you in my future, but in my past too. I want to have known you when we were small stupid kids, have held hands together as we played outside. I want to have stressed out over exams together, nudging a mug of still steaming hot chocolate against your elbow to get you to focus. I want to have told you I love you before I did anyone else. I want to have held you in my arms when all those sad memories you describe to me were still fresh wounds. I want my past to have been full of you, and full of meaningful memories with you. I want my past lives to have been spent with you, whether as two lovers, or two housecats cuddling by the fireplace on a snowy day, or two flowers that just happened to bloom on the same day, next to each other. I want to have consumed your existence and intertwined it with my own since my birth, never to be separated from you for a moment. I want to have loved you throughout it all, for all time.

Gott nimm meine Periodenkrämpfe und gib sie Friedrich Merz

schwöre die Aktivität an diesem Post ist wie so ein Merz-Bullshit-Seismograph. Immer wenn der wieder Notes bekommt weiß ich dass er was Dummes von sich gegeben hat

i hope my blog feels like you’re walking through a really well-curated museum except there’s this guy next to you who’s talking on the phone and saying really insane things and you just have to deal with that

der 🫩emoji wurde nur zu dem zweck eingeführt, akkurat beschreiben zu können, wie ich mich jedes mal fühle, wenn der name "friedrich merz" fällt

Friedrich Merz, looking at Germany's declining birthrate: "Unacceptable. We must cut parental leave down to 33% and prohibit people from switching to part-time work. That'll teach those lazy good for nothing no-child-having young people. That'll fix this economy."

little miss auditory processing disorder would like you to repeat what you just said then immediately respond to you before you finish

Having a job is an awesome way to stay hydrated because you get so bored you start drinking water just for a little excitement