Are you gay?
Have you been gay?
Will you be gay?
When will you be gay???

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YOU ARE THE REASON
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@astonishment-and-dread
Are you gay?
Have you been gay?
Will you be gay?
When will you be gay???

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help
@poison-tipped-nerf-dart

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Introducing yourself to people is so embarrassing. Like hey this is my stupid fucking name, I enjoy exactly 3 things, and am clearly anxious. please don't immediately hate me
grout white shark
does anyone else have parents who suck in objectively funny ways
drawing it made me realize this one might be a unique experience
im going through some bullshit someones homestuck fankid would experience
does anyone else have parents who suck in objectively funny ways
drawing it made me realize this one might be a unique experience
im going through some bullshit someones homestuck fankid would experience
Nova's tips for beating the heatwave:
1. Check that you have good access to shade trees, a shelter custom made to fit you and all your friends, and plenty of good airflow
2. Find the hottest, sunniest, and least windy part of you pasture and lay down
3. Make sure you look as much as possible like you have died of heatstroke
4. Get your friends in on it
A horse's biggest purpose in life is to make you think they died

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Us, arriving to Austria to a tiny family hotel owned by an elderly lady
Us: speak only limited German
Lady: barely speaks English
Us:
Lady:
Lady: Czech? Slovak?
Us: Czech
Lady, to herself: Czech, that's a Slavic language right
Lady: understand Yugoslavian?
Us:
Us: yeah that works
Shit like this can really only happen in Europe. Reminds me of the time I took my best shot at ordering at a restaurant in Spain in spanish. The closest language to spanish that I actually speak is latin.
Waiter: Germany?
Me: No, Czechia.
Waiter, in a heavily accented but intelligible Czech: Why didn’t you say so before! We get you guys here all the time!
Já v roce 2019 na Ukrajině: OK, takže když použiju tohle staročeský slovo, přidám polský sloveso, své chabé znalosti záhoráčtiny a řeknu to s ruskym přízvukem, tak to projde.
[Me in 2019 in Ukraine: ok so if i use this Old Czech word, add a Polish verb, my poor knowledge of the Záhorie dialect of Slovak and say it with a Russian accent, it might pass]
Reminds me of the time when we were in Poland and I tried to order a burger using a truly unholy mix of Slovak, Russian and Ostrava dialect (which in itself is like an unholy mix of Czech and Polish).
I did get the burger
[#my grandpa called this "Slavic Esperanto"]
I know Ukrainians who can do this on purpose and masterfully, and it was mind-blowing to hear a speech as immediately understandable to an audience of native speakers of three different native Slavic languages, not just two languages as is common
During one student exchange I (a Pole) got acquainted with two students from Czechia and Russia. At first we talked in English or German, but after a while we’ve noticed, that we could understand each other’s native languages just fine. And if some word was unknown in one language, another one had the right synonym.
*Each of us talking in their mother tongue*
Me: Bla bla bla.
Russian: I don’t know this “bla”.
Czech: Oh, we have “bla”! We also call it “that”!
Russian: Oh I know “that”! It’s a very old version of “this”.
Me: Oh, we have “this” too, but it means something slightly different.
German acquaintance: Was für nen Scheiß zieht ihr da ab? o_O
the reason there aren't slavic people in the bible is that they wouldn't have been surprised or awed to hear the disciples speak in tongues and be understood by people of many nations at once
Slavs walked away from the Tower of Babel mildly inconvenienced.
Slavic esperanto actually does exist and it's called Interslavic or Medžuslovjansky jazyk.
Everyone who speaks any slavic language will passively understand it without learning it. It's awesome and mindblowing.
[Slovanský esperanto existuje a říká se mu Interslavic, Mezislověnština nebo Medžuslovjanský jazyk.
Pokud mluvíte nějakým slovanským jazykem, tak budete pasivně rozumět bez jakéhokoliv studia. Je to skvělý a doslova vám to odpálí mozek.]
Story of Baba Jaga in Interslavic:
[Pohádka o Babě Jaze v Mezislověnštině:]
getting kicked off love island for just swimming in the pool and not talking to anyone
So fun fact from when I worked on multiple reality shows, names redacted for NDA purposes.
Gay people are INCREDIBLY ANNOYING for production when they are on reality shows cause they always do shit like this. Reality shows pick their cast specifically for people who will create drama, so it tracks that bringing in some gay people (in the era that I worked, 2013-2018, this was considered to be new and interesting) would diversify people enough to create some conflict. To a degree, this was true.
But what actually happened was that the gay person, or worse, people, would end up estranged from the other people because Straight People Who Are Fucking Nuts in a way that would be ideal for a reality show are very different from Gay People Who Are Fucking Nuts.
There's one particular instance I remember in which our Gay Person tm wasn't getting into drama and no one could figure out why. Any time anything happened it would just defuse almost instantly. Eventually we prodded during a solo interview and one of the guys said something along the lines of "Mayn gay marriage just got legalized n shit if I yell at this guy I'm being a homophobe". This meant that our gay was COASTING along in this reality show cause no one would vote him out!!
But you know what the PINNACLE of this was?
DATING SHOWS.
One... Very popular dating show I worked on (you know the one) has an unofficial, unwritten rule: you can only have 1 queer woman in the cast of ladies. This is because for a solid few years, if ever there were two bisexual women in the show, they would ALWAYS abandon the man and run off together instead. You can't have contestants saying shit like "this guy has no personality and sucks ass. I prefer this girl I met who actually listens to me". Like this was an actual epidemic in the casting. It happened over and over for YEARS and they couldn't find a way to stop it without literally separating the women from each other, which obviously wouldn't be good for the show. They also couldn't show this was happening because that. Uh. Would be pretty bad to reveal to audiences.
Eventually they just decided to subtly prod and see if women who were going on the show were gay and then avoid having two on the same season at the same time. To my knowledge they still do it this way.
Anyways the summary is that gay people are fucking crazy in a way that heterosexual tv just does not know how to handle
I love(hate) how their first solution was to be blatantly biphobic
instead of getting men that don't suck
NO*Loza’s Lovely Sorpresa [Pedigree]
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📸 Sofia Leonsen [NO*Loza’s]
🎨 Blue Tortoiseshell with White
compilation of some of my favorite tags on this post
saddest most miserable little creature only 4 whole cents!
KILLING STANCE: TEN SOUL RENDING CLAWS

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every girl wants to get in a vehicle and flip 3-6 switches overhead in the process of turning it on
When I’m going to get frozen waffles and ramen from Walgreens.
More things should be operated with big thumb switches and knobs and dials and shit.
Me, getting a drink of water at night.
Needlessly poetic in a way that draws your credibility into question. The whimsical typography also reduces the gravity of the statement. Please see the revised edition attached below.