Vodka a(lien)unt

the sluttiest thing a man could do is be covered in blood and grip his wounded side in agony

a book should be $5 a little drink should be $2 and museum access should be free and all hours

i understand that it's unreasonable to expect a band on world tour to play in every country in the world but i do think they should only be allowed to call it a world tour if they play in every continent. we need to make it embarrassing to say world tour and then not even step foot in africa

10:00pm has no business being only half an hour after 9:30pm

there's like a thousand ways for a shower to work and you wouldn't even imagine half of them until you have to take a shower at a new place

convinced if i keep digging in deeper i can find a secret way out that's not through. haven't found it yet but i think i'm close

i'm so tired of social media users saying "successful people are abusing stimulants". unsuccessful people are too. #WEMATTER

Bloopers are movie aftercare and it’s fucked up that we got rid of them

sometimes an american will be talking to you and they start throwing around numbers like 70 or 90 when talking about the weather and you just have to smile and nod

Don't be shackled by the idea that going out can only be done with a group of friends, learn to feel comfortable going alone [remembers that encouraging consumerism isn't progressive] into the deep dark woods

Normal groceries like milk or bread or whatever running out is whatever. Just anotha day. But when stuff like salt or cooking oil or rice runs out it feels like You’re supposed to be here for me and you’re leaving. You’re just like everyone else

every since i was a little girl i knew i wanted to aimlessly wander a blighted landscape

got my first ever official customer complaint because when i was going over the terms of their life insurance they were like "well i don't plan to die" and i was like "well you're going to"

Another reason why trains would be good is that most people are not good at driving

problematic sudoku solving skills gap