Well Shit

It was scary as shit, not gonna lie.

I wasn’t even there for the first...hour or so? I was in a class, and Mr Bernfeld had to call me after I got to my dorm, he had been for a while. He was mad at me, and so naturally I panicked and went over. The only birth I’d ever been around for before was my little sister’s, and I wasn’t even there to watch since I was 4-ish. So I didn’t know....that something was up. 

I took us both to this little ice cream place down the road from where we used to live. 

In the holiday spirit 

10. A man was complaining to me about the whole “””””””War on Christmas””””” and when I told him that wasn’t actually a thing, he called me a stupid liberal

9. A family friend heard about the conversion process and told me she was still going to send me Christmas cards and make sure I saw her Happy Easter posts on Facebook because “Jews are basically still Catholic”

8. I tried to explain to some random ass stranger that yes we actually have spring holidays, and she kept being fake upset that my son wouldn’t ever celebrate Easter

7. That time when a cashier said “Merry Christmas” to me, so I responded with “Happy Hanukkah” and he flipped out and told me to stop trying to convert him. Sis wh?????

6. Distant relative visited me for a weekend(she was in town) and she practically forced me to go to church with her. 

5. “Isn’t Hanukkah the Jewish Christmas?”

4. A coworker saying that antisemitism isn’t an issue anymore, and when I gave them specific examples of it, they said “Yeah but that’s just you”

3. One of my college professors being a dick about me asking if I could maybe not show up to the whole Christmas themed class he made. I’m sure it was fun for other people, but I really hated it, honestly. 

2. A friend trying to tell me not to convert because Catholicism is easy and with Judaism you have to learn a lot and go through all this stuff. I told him it’s literally the same with Catholicism and he said it wasn’t because for us Jews it’s tougher

And to top it all off....the absolute w o r s t experience

1. I had a Jewish professor, and so I was asking him about some stuff related to Judaism and all, as one does. And one of my mega-Christian classmates heard, I guess, and when I stopped talking to the teacher, he pulled out like a pocket edition of the Bible and gave it to me. He said, AND I QUOTE, “You need this more than I do”. So I burned it