A Scenic View

I lost my big puppy guy yesterday 💙

Used the long weekend to do some more unpacking, nesting and spend quality time with L ❤️

Also trying to regularly grow my army of tiny paintings.

I’m actually getting paid for some scenic sign work I did for a nearby private school, and my friends are going to pay me to do some accent mural work at their house.

He planned a whole weekend for us in my neck of the woods, and I loved every minute of it.

This was a love I never saw coming, but it feels so damn good to be cared for and considered like this.

Since the job hunt is in a rut (but ever continuing) maybe it’s a good time to figure it out? Maybe the side biz idea can float me along while I continue the search.

If not financially, at least as a good mental outlet.

A few interviews, one with my former employer for a different job open in the same department.

I wasn’t even going to apply for it, but I was encouraged to.

I got to round two then cut before the panel interviews (which I was told I would be included in).

Found out via HR that I was out of the running, no direct word from the hiring manager who I worked closely with for 11+ years.

Kind of shitty - I’m sure it’s a policy, but not very human of them.

Got to a round two with another nonprofit, cut before the panel. I could definitely do that job in my sleep, but I bet I said something weird in my 2nd interview. Being honest doesn’t always land well, I guess.

It’s hard. Many rejections. Gotta keep doing the things over and over, but it sucks.

Words fall short. I’ve been quieter and adjusting to all the newer elements of life here. But the love is loud, authentic and I’m basking in it.

We’re at three months of being together, and no one is rushing, or pushing. No one is avoiding or dragging their feet. The pace and rhythm feels right, steady and solid.

I find myself taking the rest, taking time, moving deliberately - I have a lot of stuff I need to do here, but my life has been in various states of limbo since April 2024. Between the betrayal, the decision to walk away, the separation, divorce, home sale, moving, staying with my parents, home purchase and another move - It’s been a very long ride to get here.

Losing my job of 12 years was unnecessary sprinkles on that shitty multi-layer cake, but I’m here, still on my feet, in the fight and figuring it out.

I’m two interviews in with two different nonprofits and waiting to get info/invites for the next round, aka: the panel interviews.

The hardest part is fully enjoying it in the moment, and not entertaining that part of your brain that’s waiting for the bottom to drop out.

Rainy, rainy moving day.

I’m currently at my storage unit with the moving crew feeling useless (but also trying to stay out of their way because I won’t be effective at helping at all)

Glad I don’t have to unload that sucker.

Camped out at the new place last night on a mattress I ordered - so blissfully peaceful.