thought i might post my ao3 account, since everything is also cross posted over there. that and uh. masterlist? i guess?
im a 23 year old psychology student, my pronouns are she/they, but if im being honest, I don't mind any. I can do requests, but can't really promise anything, lmao. im flaky
im queer, talkative and open for pretty much anything. this is a safe space. you feel like you need to yap, im all ears. also, I believe in the don't like, don't read/interact rule. unless it's constructive criticism i specifically ask for, keep shit to yourself. ok thats all. remember to take care of yourselves in this god awful world
my ao3
give me a reason, i'll be the cruel one+the winner takes it all (smut) (ghost x reader)
it takes strength to be gentle and kind (ghost x reader)
make it real, make me forget (john price x reader)
the cat chases the mouse (some things we just don't talk about) (keegan p. russ x reader)
a butchered tongue still singin here above the ground (ghost x reader)
wasn't ready, wasn't willing (and you hit me like a truck) (kyle 'gaz' garrick x reader)
will you still love me (if it turns out im insane?) (john 'soap' mactavish x simon 'ghost' riley)
i love you like the ashes in my cigarette box (frank woods x reader)
how long will i bleed? (digging my own grave) (ghost x roach)
the only way i know (is you) (john price x reader)
you may not like it, but you better learn how (it's your turn now) (cpt john 'soap' mactavish x f!reader)
i don't know where else i can go (soil is falling over my head) (gen, 141 x reader)
im all used up, im carrying my bag of bones (soap x roach)
you've become my ceiling (simon 'ghost' riley x reader)
i don't need the symbol of a scar (simon 'ghost' riley x reader)
wind me tighter than a wire (john 'soap' mactavish x reader)
i loved you like the sun (ghoap)
'cause i can feel ghosts (keegan p. russ x reader)
worth (simon 'ghost' riley whump)
and when broken bodies are washed ashore (who am i to ask for more?) (captain mactavish x reader)
nothing's gonna hurt you baby (ghoap)
bark like a god (baby, let's get down) (ghost x reader)
under the burden of solitude, the weight we carry (is love) (keegan p. russ whump)
i left a part of me (i wanna see if you can try to bring it back) (ghoap)
being with you (makes the flame burn good) (simon 'ghost' riley x gn!reader)
my only love is control (loving you's my only house) (john price x gn!reader)
my ghost (where did you go?) (thomas a. merrick x f!reader)
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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mactavish and grief are old friends. he's been mourning things, people, for as long as he can remember. nothing more familiar than the taste of losing something, drowned in a bottle or blood of his enemies. the bridge was the catalyst, breaking down every wall he's built to protect himself against this sick feeling, finally overwhelming him and making it the only thing he knew for sure - death follows them all, but he keeps those he watched die as close to his chest as he can. to punish himself, or maybe to stop himself from forgetting. it hurts, and he wouldn't have it any other way.
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roach acting as a mediator each time captain mactavish and ghost are close to strangling each other. he's so tired of them constantly squabbling, especially when it's usually over the most petty shit imaginable. doesn't help that ghost seemingly does this on purpose; intent on being a menace. mactavish has used every threat he could think of - a suspension, more chores, paperwork, a discharge. it doesn't work, because ghost knows that he's useful, needed in the task force. roach either works to separate them completely, or just stands in between them, knowing that the two man's soft spot for their bug is enough to have them finally shut up
i know ive already posted the smiling one but for some reason i felt like i should keep all the smiling drawings together (and it turns out there r only two of them)
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ghoap doodle someday ill get tavs face right UGGHH
also i dont think ghost has a particularly sweet or cute smile. it's probably a bit fucked by tissue damage from glasgow smile and scars in general pulling his mouth every which way. + just not being used to the movement
mactavish tortures himself sometimes; wonders if roach wanted to beg and plead, if in his mind he kept calling out to his captain, wondering where the man who's supposed to protect him is, a responsibility weighing heavy. soap's mind keeps going back to that split moment where he realized what was happening. that the first time he's allowed himself to be fully separated from his men, he's doomed them to die. it festers, slowly burning away at his chest — revenge and grief leading him by his hand, a sure death coming to claim him.
it would be the least of what he deserves. his failure, or what he deems it to be, must be punished.
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So the MW4 trailer came out about a week ago and I have some thoughts about it that I don’t want to get too much into detail here.
But to sum up my thoughts:
I think that the franchise is trying to do something new for once instead of releasing the same game over and over again with a mediocre story attached to it (I might be wrong but we’ll see).
For that, I was quite glad and a bit excited, but what sours my initial excitement about this game is the lack of Gaz in the trailer.
I’m more irritated than disappointed about it than anything else. This shit happens all the time in media so it’s no shock that it’s happening here.
What makes me the most upset is the fact that back in 2019, I was so excited to finally play as a prominent black protagonist in the franchise.
With me dealing with anti-blackness within the fandom at the time (and still dealing with it now if I’m being honest) this ONE thing made my overall experience with the franchise better.
Having Gaz be sidelined so heavily in the series has left me feeling more and more irritated with each game that releases.
It’s quite clear that Call of Duty (and Activision in general) could care less about its black and POC characters and would rather use them as a way to prop up their white male leads instead of actually doing something productive with them.
(I could ramble on more, but I’d rather stop while I’m ahead before I start saying some dumbass shit out of anger. Sorry if there’s any grammatical errors it’s late while I’m typing this…)
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Also the original illustration that this based on is by Gus Bofa. An interesting illustrator to learn about if you’re into art history!
