Still Alive

Have you ever missed a place so much that it hurts?

I never realized how much fear builds upon itself. How once you've learned to fear for your life, your safety, your treasured posessions...or even chronic things like not knowing if you'll have food or a job or working body parts or if youll need to evacuate or if you won't be able to get to a town for months during a disaster or if your brain will just die for no apparent reason someday or how you're going to lose control of your body and mind functions long before most people hit that part of the aging process...how all of that levels up your brain until your "normal" is most people's "horrifying"

And also how even when things are less dire, one little natural disaster like your entire state being on fire can bring it all back again and put your brain straight into worst-case scenario mode.

But even as disruptive and physically harmful as fear is...I can appreciate it. It means I haven't given up. I'm not suicidal. I'm still fighting. I still want to live. As long as I'm afraid, I'm ok, and I may be an emotional wreck digging deeper into already nasty mental scars, but ill be OK.

Hey this song fits that ship really well lol.

Hey that headcanon is cute lol

Hey I'm thinking about this a lot lol

Hey

Hey

I mean