fizz.

Yu Jimin's POV

it all started when i liked this certain girl in my class. she was introverted and had a small group of friends, always blending through the background while i on the other hand was loud and would confidently express my thoughts in the four corners that we will be staying at for the school year.

her name was Minjeong, although she kept to herself, she had always been good at arts and loved playing the guitar secretly. she casually enjoyed video games too. 

i never really knew my feelings for her would deepen as it started as a small crush. i would notice how sweetly she smiled and how gentle her voice is when she speaks. she's shy during group activities, especially when she's paired with people she wasn't familiar with. 

however, i had to hide my feelings as we are both girls. in these society, no one knows what they'll say to me or worse what minjeong will think of me. i know i had to let go of these feelings. 

then i created a dump account and expressed my feelings for her. that way, i can finally move on.

“hello. this might be a bit sudden but i just wanted to let you know you're pretty especially when you smile. i like you a lot and i'll remain in the shadows, liking you :))" 

i didn’t open that account for a while—no, i put that silly confession on the back of my mind. i proceeded with my school days filled with both happiness, stress and a secret longing for a response. one silent night, i was quietly doing my homework when i did get a response.

“hi, i don’t know what to say but thank you i guess?”

“but i’m also quite curious as to who you are”

as soon as my phone dinged with the notification of her message, i panicked. i immediately dropped whatever i was doing as i jumped into my bed headfirst on the pillow silently screaming at whatever pushed me into this situation. i grabbed my phone opening the message that made me broke in cold sweat. 

“hello!! i didn’t expect to get a response from you. thank you for not finding me weird :))”

i sent, sighing in relief but at the same time my lips curled up in excitement. is this my chance? i thought to myself.

“do you know me?”

“personally… no? but i’ve seen you a couple of times in school”

“ah… but how did you get my name?”

“that part… i just kinda heard your name when you were walking with a friend”

i lied as i feared i’ll be discovered.

we talked more as days came by. in the morning, i ca see her at school while we talk in the evening. one particular night, i sent something a picture of me doing my schoolworks as a way of updating her what i am doing. what i failed to notice is that my school id was displayed in the photo. 

i didn’t notice it at first but she became a bit distant to me. ‘did she find out who i am?’ ‘did i do something wrong?’ those thoughts filled my mind. absentmindedly, i  scrolled through our past conversation, trying to relive those sweet and exciting moments. all of a sudden i saw the past picture i sent and my eyes widened in shock. my school id was exposed. i panicked and closed my phone, pacing back and forth on my room, gaslighting myself that she didn’t see it. 

morning came in and i felt tired. I didn’t get to sleep well considering i was paranoid of minjeong figuring out my identity. when i entered the room, she was there. i didn’t dare look at her but i can feel her staring at my back and that sure felt uncomfortable. she knows. she definitely knows it’s me. now i’m doomed. 

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