im literally in tears what the fuck
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im literally in tears what the fuck

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my publisher: Good morning! Huh did you advertise for the pre-sale yesterday? Because we launched twelve hours ago and we already made sales!
me: yeah, i posted on tumblr
publisher: .........tumblr?
me: that's where the gays are.
(link to Mrs. Victoria buys a brothel, a sapphic western)
update
publisher: And what is your marketing strategy on... tumblr?
me: idk, i shitpost at 2am?
publisher: .....and it works?
me: depends on what the gays find funny at that point in time.
publisher: Could I have a link to your tumblr?
me: .......absolutely not.
(link to Mrs. Victoria buys a brothel, a sapphic western where 50 year old women kiss and murder)
update!
publisher: I've been looking into tumblr, have you thought of using Blaze to promote your book?
me: NO
publisher: But it seems like an efficient way to get this in front of more eyes-
me: people on tumblr hate Blaze.
publisher: There is no algorithm and you can't pay to promote a post? I don't understand how anyone advertises anything on tumblr.
me: That's the best part. They don't. They can't.
(trying to make him understand that we do not control the attention. We just have to show something shiny and gay enough and if people are interested, they'll reblog.)
(Mrs. Victoria buys a brothel, a deconstruction of the colonialist cowboy mythos dressed up as a sapphic romance.)
update with picture of a pet!
This is Cosmos, my publisher's dog.
He barks at my publisher's phone notifications. So every time a book is sold, Cosmos barks.
It's been days.
I think you guys would love to know that when you buy a book, a dog barks in Vancouver, Canada.
(Mrs. Victoria buys a brothel, a story where women help women bury the body of your abusive husband.)
patrick is short for Patricide and squidward is short for Squealing Edward and spongebob is short because he has little legs
having read some Martha Wells interviews it does really tickle me to imagine that when Murderbot asks for a ride, ART is basically doing that thing where you decide to entertain an obvious scam artist for a bit. Like, "Well, this is most likely a corporate spy, but I guess I am spying back on corporates right now so sure LOL let's see what the humans told it to do to trick me"
And then said 'corporate spy' spends 8 straight hours curled up on a chair watching TV and ART is like, "Oh shit you're like, a real person with no agenda. Let's hang out actually"
*sigh* fine, fine, i'll be the new doctor who showrunner. bring me two twinks, britain's tallest woman, and 1000 pounds worth of alumininamian foil

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Maritime silk dress, 1930s
Maritime silk dress, 1930s
the thing is, im always interested in The Paperwork. whenever The Characters moan and groan about The Paperwork and whenever it's left unspecified what The Paperwork entails i go aw... The Paperwork... u dont deserve this attitude, The Paperwork... im sure you're very interesting and important... this is because i like my job at The Paperwork factory and because i like homework and it's also because The Characters often hold positions of power attained through superhuman abilities and enforced with violence and i know that The Paperwork is there, aspirationally, to document their actions and protect people. from institutional neglect and from The Characters. when The Characters ignore The Paperwork to fuck each other on The Desk i think less of them for it. i do.
i made this post offhandedly, but resentment/dismissal of The Paperwork is a trope from procedural fiction and commercial sff that is really really common in fanworks bc it makes for an easy shorthand when u don't want to research or invent the details of a job, and i do seriously want to ask everyone to get skeptical of it. it functions as part of a broader narrative type of the ultra-talented Maverick, usually law enforcement or pseudo law enforcement (e.g. a monster hunter, a status-quo-enforcing time traveler, a man in black, a moral mercenary, etc.), whose ability to police the boundaries of Civilization ("normal," defined by hegemony, Flawed But Worth Preserving!) and protect a homogenous Public (white, heteronormative, bourgeois, documented, "law-abiding," "innocent," helpless!!) is limited not by his energy or ability, but by forces (small-minded, foolish, persnickety, overcautious, sexless, dull, effeminate!!!) of Overhead, from whence comes... The Paperwork.
The Paperwork might be generated by administrators, journalists, lawyers, judges, civilian oversight committees, the village elders or the intergalactic legislature, depending on the story. and who benefits from us telling each other stories that belittle & villainize those professions while lionizing The Maverick? "if only The Maverick were given unlimited resources, unlimited access, unlimited privacy in his operations, and unlimited use of excessive force, he would be able to protect The Public (and find love! maybe on The Desk)." you see it, right? this is how copaganda will get in your head.
who remember vine 😂 that shit was funny or not, depending
I hope Pearl gets more evil and powerful btw. I support Pearl rights and Pearl wrongs. I hope she kills and betrays everyone and then wins and then uses her wish to do something selfish.

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Anybody else notice how in Apo's opening cinematic her skin doesn't have any bracelets but in-game her skin has 2 bracelets with the exact same design and placement as that of the friend who betrayed her?
like notably. she did NOT have those on during the moment she died, but she DOES have them on now.
idk. interesting. to me. what does it mean.
also occurs to me that morpheus is sort of maybe taking the form of apo's friend also. same hair. same bracelets. same pin. what do it mean. hm. apokuna im watching you.
Thinking about this realistically, it's not out of character for morpheus to do this. he's specifically a god representing people in dreams. there are 3 gods of dreams, his 2 brothers represent inanimate objects and beasts. He's people, specifically, that's why Apo has the shapeshifting power in the first place.
So, Morpheus invoking the form of someone else in a dream, not that weird.
What IS that weird is *why* this friend. It's notable that in the very dream-like intro cinematic, Apo's friend is the only person with facial features and to not be in monochrome, which feels significant.
You could argue this means something sinister for Morpheus' characterization, I'd disagree. Mostly because of what's DIFFERENT about the designs.
Apo's friend is actually very very well designed. His pallette is mostly green, the opposite of magenta/red on the colour wheel, and therefore opposite to both Apo's main colours AND the colours of the poppies that represent the rebellion. Also, he wears a CROWN of poppies. Showing that he's trying to use the rebellion to enrich himself.
Morpheus DOES have the poppy pin, so it's not a removal of that symbolism, he SPECIFICALLY lacks that crown. Also he wears purple instead of green. Which isn't opposite to the colours of Apo and the rebellion, instead it's right next to red/magenta. (but not the same...)
Anyways what does this all mean? Idk, but as I said I'm watching you Apokuna.
eighteen inch nails: i want to fuck you like two animals
one inch nails: i want to fuck you like .111111... of an animal
If you really care about preventing government tyranny, your #1 priority must be making sure criminals have rights.
And that's not a joke or an exaggeration.
If criminals don't have rights, then all the government has to do is find some excuse to label people as criminals, and those people will no longer have rights. It's what literally every tyrannical government in all of history has done.
If you believe that people who break the law should forfeit their rights, you're literally as pro-tyranny as a person can get.
did not register this last line as "lo!" for a solid few seconds. maybe you didn't either

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Your post sucks ass. Is that ok?
❤️YES NO
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