is anybody out there?

how's your head?

we're in this until the end.

i've never looked at anyone the way i look at you.

hey! can you hear me? i'll be right there!

i know you better than you think.

stay safe, okay?

let me take a look at your injury.

you're special to me.

why are you limping?

problem solved!

you didn't deserve that.

i brought you some food.

i wish you would just listen to me.

i'm right behind you.

why are you covered in blood?

you can lay your head on my shoulder if you want.

sleep. it's all right. i'll keep watch.

please come in. you're not intruding.

i've got you. hold on.

i let you sleep.

you need to rest. you're not ready.

wrap your arms around me.

this never should have happened.

i'll take care of everything.

call me if there's an emergency.

i went and got your mail.

i have you on speed dial.

five more steps. you can do it.

when's the last time you slept?

i have your coffee order memorized.

here, take this. this should help.

don't forget your jacket.

you're running a fever.

i know exactly what you're thinking.

over my dead body.

do you need help in the shower?

you don't have to lift a finger.

let me tidy up the place for you.

need a ride?

can i get you anything? food? water?

let me get you something to drink.

take my hand!

shut your eyes for a while. it's okay.

you can use my bed.

i'll carry you if you want.

need a backrub?

i got your message. are you all right?

i'll take care of it.

no matter what happens, i will always love you.

where did you get that bruise?

let me draw a bath for you.

wait right here. don't move.

i've been looking all over for you.

i made this for you.

this should help with the swelling.

you deserve better than this.

you can have my umbrella.

come inside. i'll take care of you.

where does it hurt?

i'll pick you up tomorrow morning.

you were supposed to go home an hour ago.

this was the only place i could think of.

you're the only person i can turn to.

you've always been on my mind.

i'll lay right here. i won't go anywhere.

squeeze my hand.

it's just that i love you so much...

if something happens, call me.

don't move. i'll be there in ten minutes.

you mean the world to me.

i don't know what i'd do if something happened to you.

go! i'll cover you!

let me massage your shoulders.

when's the last time you ate something?

here, take my jacket.

how long have you been here?

you sit. i'll find it.

i started the shower for you.

i cleaned while you were asleep.

don't you see? you matter to me.

if you fall asleep on me, it's all right.

a life without you is no life worth living at all.

i've never loved anyone like i love you.

→     𝐈 .    GENERAL

❛   hush .   raise  a  finger  in  a  gesture  to  silence  my  muse . ❛   sit .   gesture  for  my  muse  to  sit  down . ❛   door .   hold  a  door  open  for  my  muse . ❛   tap .   tap  my  muse  on  the  shoulder  to  garner  their  attention . ❛   hunger .   give  my  muse  something  to  eat  /  drink . ❛   cook .   present  my  muse  with  home - cooked  food . ❛   brush .   work  a  brush  /  comb  through  my  muse’s  hair . ❛   read .   silently  read  a  book  alongside  my  muse . ❛   hand .   hold  out  a  hand  for  my  muse  to  take . ❛   dressed .   help  my  muse  put  on  an  article  of  clothing . ❛   note .   give  my  muse  a  note  saying :   [ content ] . ❛   amplify .   turn  up  the  music  in  the  car .

→     𝐈𝐈 .    ANGST

❛   patch .   help  my  muse  patch  up  a  wound . ❛   night terrors .   hold  my  muse  after  they  wake  up  from  a  nightmare . ❛   company .   silently  sit  with  my  muse  to  comfort  them. ❛   hospital .   my  muse  is  told  that  yours  is  in  the  hospital . ❛   revelation .   show  my  muse  evidence  of  a  lie  they  told . ❛   indulge .   find  my  muse  drinking  to  cope . ❛   downfall .   find  my  muse  collapsed  on  the  ground . ❛   console .   comfort  my  muse  as  they  cry . ❛   nurse .   give  my  muse  company  in  the  hospital .

→     𝐈𝐈𝐈 .    AFFECTIONATE

❛   wink .   wink  at  my  muse .  ❛   wrap .   wrap  an  arm  around  my  muse’s  [ shoulders  /  waist ] . ❛   caress .   gently  caress  my  muse’s  face . ❛   tousle .   mess  playfully  with  my  muse’s  hair . ❛   chest .   place  your  head  on  my  muse’s  chest .    ❛   comb .   comb  fingers  through  my  muse’s  hair . ❛   grasp .   run  to  my  muse  &  jump  into  their  arms . ❛   lean .   lean  on  my  muse’s  shoulder . ❛   tender .   kiss  my  muse  on  the  [ forehead  /  cheek  /  nose ] . ❛   abrupt .   kiss  my  muse  out  of  the  blue . ❛   chaste .   chastely  kiss  my  muse . ❛   good morning .   kiss  my  muse  the  morning  after . ❛   volumes .   gaze  at  my  muse  in  a  way  that  silently  says  ‘i love you’ .

→     𝐈𝐕  .    VIOLENT

❛   strike .   [ slap / punch ]  my muse in the face . ❛   gun .   wield  a  gun  at  my  muse . ❛   twist .   twist  my  muse’s  arm  behind  their  back . ❛   throttle .   aggressively  wrap  your  hands  around  my  muse’s  throat . ❛   parch .   burn  my  muse  with  a  hot  object . ❛   take down .   forcefully  bring  my  muse  to  the  ground . ❛   gouge .   wield  a  sharp  object  at  my  muse . ❛  shunt .   shove  my  muse  backwards . ❛  stickup .   yell  at  my  muse  to  put  their  hands  in  the  air. ❛  shoot .   [ fatally  /  non-fatally ]   shoot  my  muse . ❛  stab .   stab  my  muse with a  [ knife / other object ].

→     𝐕 .    NSFW

Cold creeps in, despite the late spring heat wave that had sunk it's claws into May, and Ethan licks his lips like a nervous dog with hungry chops. If his heart still beat -- if he still had a heart, he was certain Henry would be able to hear it, even more than an arms length away.

(Funny, how they've been so careful to keep a distance, pulling at an invisible leash between them, since that kiss. Ethan doesn't think he's ever noticed how close or far someone was to him before, and certainly not in the context of a friendly nature)

ㅤㅤDo you believe in ghosts?

Does Henry know? ㅤㅤHas he known this whole time?

Mid-step, Ethan stops in the middle of the path and turns fully to look at Henry, his body ram-rod straight and tense. His eyes dart over the features on the other man's face that are at once both familiar and strange, as if he might find some truth of Henry's intentions. All he sees is a hollow haunted expression, still smeared with the shadows of blood that stained against his skin in splotches.

No desperation, just a miserable acceptance.

Does Henry know? ㅤㅤMaybe, but Ethan is beginning to doubt.

Quick as a flash, he diverts his eyes back to the path, hums softly under his breath as he considers an answer. It seems clear to him that it is not the simple question people ask as they get to know eachother; there is a weight in Henry's inquisition, and Ethan...

Does not want to get the answer wrong.

"I don't know -- maybe? ㅤㅤThings happen all of the time we don't have explanations for, especially for the people in group."

A half-hearted shrug and Ethan swings around to walk backwards as they talk, still not quite meeting Henry's eyes.

Something about his question gives Ethan pause, and Henry wonders back to the ghost in group. He thinks about how they all give space even if they don't realize they're doing it. None of them would notice even if it's pointed out. Kind of like how it took five days for anyone to realize he was locked up and even then they didn't really think anything was that weird.

It's the same kind of strangeness on Ethan's face. Like he knows something, but he doesn't really. He doesn't know anything at all or at least it's not talked about. It's not something they should breach because it's an unspoken thing. A truth you don't shed light on unless you want to open Pandora's box.

The thing is, they all feel a little bit like death. They're all a little like ghosts. People who have gone through the things they've dealt with have an aura to then that's not so different than the spirits Henry sees all the time. Ethan just happens to exude it a little more than the rest, and it's even worse after he came back. But that doesn't really mean anything. People interact with him, they see him, he's real, he's there. It's not like the ghosts, the real deal.

Ethan's just as haunted as Henry is. That's all there is to it.

He answers and Henry drifts. Of course he wouldn't believe in ghosts. He's not insane like Henry is. His eyes sting and he feels a little hysterical. The park is muted and he thinks if he steps off the path, he'll end up somewhere else. He's going to wake up and the ceiling is going to stare down at him and in the living room the TV will be loud with static.

He's never getting out of the room.

"... I guess...I must be one of those people." Henry clears his throat because his voice comes out wavering. Like he's on the verge of tears and Henry's not and never has been the emotional type. "I had a place. It was haunted. I mean. I think um, the whole building was, man."

Instead of crossing his arms like he wants, Henry shoves his hands into his pockets. He forces himself to look at Ethan, even if the other wouldn't look at him.

Ethan wants to trust Henry, wants to believe there isn't something maligned lurking under or behind every person he meets. It's hard to trust him -- it's hard to trust anyone, when the woman he had spent most of his adult life with had turned out to be living an entirely secret life, disappearing into the ether of nothing, and resulting in the events that had unfolded as they had.

He understands, on a certain level, that Henry is and has been dealing with his own shit through his life. Ending up in that support group isn't easy on anyone, afterall; you don't end up in their little club without something horrifying happening. But these sorts of... events... tend to change people. Of course, that's a given; Ethan himself has become harder, tougher.... suspicious of others. But where once someone can stand a victim, there can also be the unfolding of a monster.

Ethan doesn't want to think everyone he meets is just a terrible beast of a creature in hiding, waiting for the worst moment to strike. He wants to believe in the inherent goodness of others, again. He's working on it, in therapy. Talking with a professional, talking with Leon, talking with the group... and Henry.

He likes Henry. Really likes him.

But he had loved Mia, and he liked Chris quite a bit before he came stampeding in in the middle of the night to obliterate what Ethan thought was Mia, but wasn't... though Chris hadn't stopped to explain that or anything to Ethan in the interim at all.

So, yes, Ethan likes Henry. Ethan wants to trust Henry, but even so, on these little outtings outside of support group, or even that time they kissed (though neither of them have spoken about it since), he's always on the lookout for something... strange.

Something that tells a story Ethan doesn't want to read again.

The two remaining fingers on his left hand rap against the door of Henry's apartment, and he waits. And waits. Longer than usual, but not a strange amount of time before Henry answers, and there's something... off. Dread builds in Ethan's stomach, like the moment in a horror movie (he used to like them... before) when he's expecting a jumpscare, knows it's coming, just around the corner...

Henry shrugs him off, asks him to sit down, but Ethan only graces his full fingered hand across the back of the kitchen chair before his mind starts speaking to him again. Like an insistent whisper, he can't ignore the dread. He has to look around that corner, has to--

A Crash. Bang.

No boom, though, so that has to be a good sign. His dead feet carry him into the bathroom, and he doesn't want to look but feels like he can't not. To not be prepared is to die, and he's already done it twice; Ethan doesn't know if he has it in him to do it again.

Paranoia rings -- but Ethan wants to trust Henry. He wants to. He wants to...

"Yeah, man. Okay. You wanna try the park again?"

They'll have to wash Henry's face off somewhere else, the blood dripping like snot from a runny nose. There's no injury to be seen on the other man to justify all of the warm, but Ethan is ignoring that red flag for now. Just... put it away to think about after.

Henry nods. Words are hard right now. The psychiatrist said he's used dissociation as a defense mechanism for years; since he was a kid covering his ears to his father's emotional abuse. It makes going through things like this easier, because he just turns himself off. He runs on autopilot. He's not supposed to do this, and yet he doesn't know how else to function.

He gets up because he has to. He catches a glimpse of the mirror and flinches as he escapes the bathroom. His apartment. He has enough wherewithal to grab a sheet of napkins and wipes his face. It comes away red, brown, and he knows he still looks a mess but he doesn't care. The air feels oppressive. There's a weight on his chest. Any second, now, there will be chains bolted across his door.

In the end, they make it to the park. Henry's quiet the whole time. It's that uneasy silence. The kind that feels like something is about to pop. Maybe it's the sharp edge of a panic attack, or maybe it's just the too-bright light of reality finding him again. Remember, you can't have anything normal. You're the Receiver of Wisdom. So, receive.

"Do you...Do um. Do you believe in ghosts?" Henry says finally, stuttering hard.

give that to me! where did you find this?!

do you drink coffee or tea?

sorry– am i crazy, or have we met before?

do you trust me enough to close your eyes?

when were you planning on telling me?

at the risk of being a cliché, do you want to get out of here?

can i convince you to stay the night?

do i look like someone who knows what that means?

would you consider giving me a second chance?

do you really think that's helpful right now?

would you mind showing me around?

do you ever plan on forgiving yourself?

are you thinking what i'm thinking?

can we ... go out and do something crazy?

why are we whispering?

who exactly are you, anyways?

can't we just be civil for a minute?

does the past ever keep you up at night?

if you have nothing to hide, what's the problem?

how long has it been since i saw you last, [ name ]?

did the power just go out?

are we still doing the thing where we pretend not to care?

how should we celebrate?

can we just ... start over?

why is this so important to you?

how was i supposed to know that?!

do you want me to stay? it doesn't have to mean anything.

where are you? nobody's heard from you.

can you help me zip this up?

why do these things always happen to me?

you don't secretly hate me, right?

can i get you something to eat? –or drink?

ready to see what i've been working on?

where have you been disappearing off to?

what's that perfume you're wearing?

you're laughing?! do you really think this is funny?

are you planning to stay for dinner?

did you think it was going to be easy?

you see where you went wrong, don't you?

when did we become so cold and distant?

who are you working for?

did you really do all of this for me?

can i open my eyes yet?

haven't you heard the stories?

[ name ], what are you doing here?

what's it gonna take for you to trust me?

do you believe people can change?

how about we catch the ten o'clock showing?

don't you remember what happened last time?

why is it so unbelievable that i'd want to help you?

you're [ name ], aren't you?

who did this to you?!

how did you know i'd be here?

what's that supposed to mean?

do you think i'm irredeemable?

what kind of mess have you gotten us into?!

do you see anything you like?

what do i owe you for the food?

why won't this stupid thing work?!

does tonight really have to end?

holy shit. can you believe we really pulled that off?!

i can tell you're upset, [ name ]. what happened?

how long have you been standing there?

do you ever wish you could just ... run away?

haven't we been here before?

wait, shush ... did you hear that?

did i miss today's newsletter or something?

can we put our differences aside for a second?

what are you getting out of this, exactly?

you'd tell me if something was wrong, right?

are you willing to bet on it?

would you kill for me?

what made you think that was okay?!

do you believe people can change?

what's the worst thing you've ever done?

you were going to leave without saying goodbye?

[ name ], can you sit up for me?

can i kiss you?

where are your keys? you're not driving like this.

how's life been treating you?

where have you been?!

aren't we supposed to be alone tonight?

aw, has someone had a little too much to drink?

where are you going with this?

are we really doing this right now?

have you eaten today?

can i crash here for the night?

how did you learn to lie so well?

can i at least buy you a drink?

where should i meet you?

is that  ...  blood?!

are you trying to make me jealous right now?

what’s your problem? you're acting weird.

[ name ], you're ... real, right?

where’s your sense of adventure?

do you like horror movies?

what are you trying to prove?

can you give me a ride?

do you have any idea what you've done?

shouldn't you answer that?

why should i be the one to calm down?

have you been up all night?

why are you lying to me?

is that my [ jacket / hoodie / shirt ]?

what are you so afraid of?

do you want to grow old with me?

you’re gonna walk away from this?

are you nervous? your hands are shaking.

where am i supposed to go?

how many fingers am i holding up?

you want me to just walk away from this?

[ name ], slow down– what's wrong?!

are you embarrassed of me?

what's that smell? something's burning.

how can i make it up to you?

why can't you stay out of it?

is this some kind of trick?

come on, what do you have to lose?

do you ever still think of me?

idiot. why didn't you tell me?!

can we stop and think about this rationally?

how long has it been since you’ve slept?

what's your ideal first date?

are you ready to tell me the truth?

i almost died, and you're laughing?

what do you mean, "sort of"?

can we just stay like this forever?

when can i see you again?

can we put this behind us?

oh ... you thought of me first?

where did you learn to do that?

oh my god,  are you bleeding?!

where are you?  nobody’s heard from you.

[ name ], are you drunk?

how can i make this go away?

someone's jumpy today. are you feeling okay?

are we safe here?

what can i do to convince you?

what could possibly go wrong?

you have no idea who i am, do you?

how do you really feel about me?

why can't you look me in the eyes?

did you know you talk in your sleep?

were you following me?

can we just pretend this never happened?

are you just barely getting home?

are you even listening to me right now?!

where does it hurt?  can you show me?

are you trying to get yourself killed?!

how about we just forget the world exists?

how long have you been keeping this from me?

were you ever going to tell me?

what do you make of this?

[ name ],  what the hell?!

can we just be honest with each other, here?

are you trying to keep me a secret?

why does your story keep changing?

how long have you known?

it can't be that bad, right?

are you happy? i mean, really happy?

isn't this place amazing?

did i interrupt something?

how am i supposed to trust you?

are they still following us?

are you fucking serious?

do you remember our first kiss?

can we take a break for a minute?

how about we disappear for awhile?

you're going to walk away from this?

can you please just cut the crap?!

why didn't you tell me you were hurt?

how can i make this go away?

can you just look at me, please?

is there anything i can do to change your mind?

do you ever stop talking?

that depends. are you done lying to me?

are you sure this is legal?

how do you take your coffee?

can you keep your voice down?

[ wipe ] sender wipes away receiver's tears [ hurt ] sender hurts receiver with words [ lonely ] sender finds receiver alone in a dark room [ wounded ] sender patches up receiver's wounds [ crying ] sender finds receiver crying [ help ] sender runs to receiver when they scream for help [ nightmare ] sender wakes receiver up from a nightmare [ dying breath ] sender talks to receiver before dying [ hold on ] sender pulls receiver into their arms [ anger ] sender takes their anger out on receiver [ argue ] sender gets into a heated argument with receiver [ scared ] sender scares receiver [ sick ] sender cares for receiver while they are sick [ palm ] sender places a hand on receiver to stop them from doing something [ fight ] sender gets into a physical fight with receiver [ comfort ] sender tries to comfort receiver [ blood ] sender notices that receiver is bleeding [ collapse ] sender collapses into receiver's arms [ pressure ] sender puts pressure on receiver's wound [ slap ] sender slaps receiver in the face [ panic ] sender helps receiver through a panic attack [ lie ] sender catches receiver in a lie [ sobs ] sender sobs uncontrollably while receiver holds them [ hiding ] sender finds out that receiver has hidden an injury from them [ death ] sender just died, receiver finds out [ chin up ] sender lifts receiver's chin to stop them from hiding their tears [ fears ] sender talks to receiver about their fears [ scream ] sender screams at receiver [ coping ] sender teaches receiver some coping mechanisms [ loss ] sender is there for receiver after they've lost someone important to them [ needs ] sender asks receiver what they need [ bullet ] sender takes a bullet for receiver [ bruises ] sender finds bruises of unknown origin on receiver [ rainfall ] sender finds receiver out alone in the rain [ hospital ] sender wakes up in a hospital bed and finds receiver sitting by their bedside [ intrude ] sender walks in on receiver treating their wounds [ calming ] sender tries to calm down receiver [ inspection ] sender holds receiver's face while inspecting an injury they got [ rescue ] sender carries receiver to safety [ clean ] sender cleans blood off of receiver's body