Humility
What can I say about being humble?
It’s been an experiential learning lesson. The humbling process for me first began as a threat and an attack on who I was as a person. What I was interested in, what was important to me, and who I wanted to be. I wasn’t rooted in God so every little attack felt like I needed to be on defense. I had to explain who I was or prove to others why they were incorrect. My eyes were so narrowed to look for and find where I needed to defend myself or it went down another road: I questioned myself and began adapting to what others wanted for me.
However, the true test of humility begins with a surrendering process. Satan will use the people closest to you to bring you down. Being rooted in God means you gain strength and wisdom to carry on. A humble person has no need to impress anyone. There are plenty of moments in life when someone says something to rub us the wrong way. I was working for my Grandfather and within 3 days he decided I wasn’t worth anything. He made sure to make comments, but not one time did I get an attitude back. I had surrendered and said nothing. This was a new reaction God had put on my heart just 6 months prior. I was pregnant with the idea of humility and it gradually started to develop in me.
There were two main things the had originally prevented me from surrendering which were 1) the need to stick up for myself or 2) The emotional firework that went off in me
The surrendering process for me meant that people would use their words to speak negatively about me and it no longer triggered a survival instinct. Accept the things you cannot change and the wisdom to know the difference.
The true humbling process only began here. In the beginning I had surrendered but my mind still had it’s own battle. I had my own first choice words going on in my head that justified me not responding. That graduated into a true peace of mind with no battle to stay in God’s roots.
What Prevents Humility?
The Need to be Right
The Need to Impress
The Need to Be in Control
When I no longer had these three desires, I had a peaceful mind and felt rooted in God. It was a feeling that I had strived so hard to receive so God knew that when I received it I would fully appreciate it. However, it didn’t come without some worries.
You wouldn’t believe how much less I had to say. My peace of mind had left me...somewhat speechless! However, I knew my mind was being remolded for God’s presence. If other people rejected me because of my lack of words, I knew God loved and accepted me and it was all going to be wonderful.
In this phase I battled two insecurities: Feeling unimportant and feeling like my life had no purpose.
