cah intersex, assigned female. came out as transgender at ~14 years old, began T at 21, mastectomy at 22. almost 30 now. call me anhithe misken.
i don't identify as trans anymore. i don't identify as cis. i would call myself neither a detransitioner nor a retransitioner. i don't identify as a woman or a female. i simply am.
i want liberation for everyone. i feel alienated from most mainstream and fringe perspectives. i am very mentally ill. i am eccentric. i like writing about my thoughts and i'll post them here.
i like to lie. i like to reveal the truth through it. i'm a lot of things with a lot of faces.
more about my beliefs below
i'm not a radfem because i do not fuck with their bioessentialism. i think they have some good insights and perceptions, but it falls into bigoted pseudoscience far too often when instead it should be engaging in material and social analysis of reality. they're very close to being right.
i'm not a transfeminist because i do not fuck with their repackaged essentialism that is basically just MRA shit rebranded and with terminology flipped around so you can't criticize their bullshit without being called a transmisogynist. they treat transmisogyny like a new worse thing instead of what it definitionally is: the intersection of transphobia and misogyny.
I truly get where they come from but they are frequently divorced from reality in ways that do the whole movement harm, or are incredibly short-sighted, such as the tendency to expand what a woman can be instead of realizing the whole concept of gender is poison and working to do away with it.
also: unchecked misogyny is rampant in the demographic and i'm tired of seeing and hearing it and being disallowed from talking about or even just acknowledging it because doing so is an act of transmisogyny, The New Worse Morse Serious-Than-Just-Misogyny Thing.
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we can see from the reception of transmasc-voices that even if you are as respectful as possible, even if you follow the correct social script and perform all of the steps, and even if you make it abundantly clear that you see trans women as women and support trans rights, talking about any of them being abusers or predators as individuals is unacceptable to the wider trans community. this is because they are terrified, rightfully so, of being further oppressed and attacked. i understand fully well that trans women are pedojacketed and slandered frequently, and that a major amount of this is bullshit. but there are also real women on this very website right now who are abusers, and their sisters protect them to ensure they remain platformed because of the fear of transmisogynistic backlash and hatred and because of how they protect their own. but you cannot protect abusers just because they are marginalized without risking that become the norm of the community.
i have been very sensitive to and aware of this overarching pattern for a while but i am still finding the words to articulate it.
there is a tendency of marginalized, niche, or otherwise in some way fringe spaces to become cesspits. this is not because of some innate quality of the people in the demographic/community/space, but because of how this mechanically operates. it is a consistent over-correction, a panicked, flailing response when it feels like they are beginning to lose grip on the narrative. this one bad person might affirm the reality of a bigoted statement, we absolutely under no circumstances cannot allow this to be true... and so it becomes false, because the community rejected it, the narrative of the victim that is. instead of the abuser and the community absorbing the impact, the victim continues to, alone, because the group is terrified of the implications of what was done and values the many over the few.
it's wrong but it is a very animal thing. we see it time and time again, all manner of groups protects their own from abuse allegations like this. It does not matter how you ken it.
it makes me feel really sad that the first people to call me intelligent pretty much since my parents died are people on a lolcow forum. other than that i've just had doctors and other professionals working on my disability case tell me my IQ could get me into MENSA and all of this other shit supposed to make me feel good about myself that only just makes me want to scream because why do I only have value if i'm something that can be shaped and molded and i've got potential to you? i'm finished now. i'm finishing myself. me. why is that never enough.
genuinely resisting the urge to smash my keyboard and cry over this i can't lie. this is the thing that gets to me about all of this. a genuine compliment of my wit. i've just spent years being called stupid and dumb and told to shut the fuck up in queer spaces. i know i'm not unintelligent, and that intelligence is subjective. i know i have some pretty radical ideas and if people would listen to me maybe... ugh. i'm not special but i know i'm smart despite having people treat me like a fool so this just gets to me i suppose
In my experience, one of the reasons the idea of "brain gender" is such a persistent gremlin even in ostensibly progressive spaces is that a lot of folks haven't really abandoned the bioessentialist framework of gender, they've just modified it to include trans people, and trans-inclusive bioessentialism falls apart if brain gender isn't real.
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im literally the one behind one of the major blogs being talked about rn btw lol but i highly doubt anyone would even find this blog to say a damn thing to me
so one of my problems is that I think gender and sex are both tools the patriarchy uses to subjugate, oppress, and control the class that controls the means of reproduction. this comes about from my experiences as an intersex afab trans person. I strongly disagree with a lot of the bioessentialism I see radfems spouting because of the research I have done, my own experiences, and the people i have met.
i think a massive amount of misogyny comes from quite simply the fact that people who are born female are assumed to have a particular set of characteristics, most notably the ability to be impregnated. that is a vulnerability the other class of people do not possess. even if you diverge from anatomical "norms" or present differently, if you are clocked as part of that impregnable class of person, you are going to be mistreated, and if you actually are born into the class the patriarchy denotes as incubators by virtue of what organs we possess, you can never truly escape from it, your entire life then becomes hinged on passing, which is its own prison to me.
but I don't think it's male vs female as categories, i think it comes down to who can perpetuate the species and everything else becomes informed by that, and that is why we are treated like cattle regardless of our relationship to "sex" or "gender."
by nature this will also impact camabs, they live in a world that encourages them to dominate and control the means of reproduction. if you rebel against that in any way real or perceived, you will be corrected, punished, ostracized for rejecting the order of things. it is not really a natural order to be very clear, it is a globally-imposed one.
but rebelling against this "order" is inherently worse for those whose bodies can be forced to bare bodies, the reproductive class. the world is largely structured around their oppression; if an incubator rebels against the natural order of things, something must be seriously wrong with it. especially if it wants to have power equal to the incubator class.
this is not meant to reduce assigned females or women to their genitalia or reproductive role, but rather to examine the reality of misogyny through an honest lens. it is about who has the power to continue the human race, and it is those with the bodies able to conceive and reproduce. and because the patriarchy lacks this, they find ways to seize and control us.
so one of my problems is that I think gender and sex are both tools the patriarchy uses to subjugate, oppress, and control the class that controls the means of reproduction. this comes about from my experiences as an intersex afab trans person. I strongly disagree with a lot of the bioessentialism I see radfems spouting because of the research I have done, my own experiences, and the people i have met.
i think a massive amount of misogyny comes from quite simply the fact that people who are born female are assumed to have a particular set of characteristics, most notably the ability to be impregnated. that is a vulnerability the other class of people do not possess. even if you diverge from anatomical "norms" or present differently, if you are clocked as part of that impregnable class of person, you are going to be mistreated, and if you actually are born into the class the patriarchy denotes as incubators by virtue of what organs we possess, you can never truly escape from it, your entire life then becomes hinged on passing, which is its own prison to me.
but I don't think it's male vs female as categories, i think it comes down to who can perpetuate the species and everything else becomes informed by that, and that is why we are treated like cattle regardless of our relationship to "sex" or "gender."
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
✓ Live Streaming✓ Interactive Chat✓ Private Shows✓ HD Quality✓ Free Actions
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
