It’s Andy, Bitch

Jon.  I have a phone.  I can read online posts.  Hard to believe, but I am literate as fuck. Actually…I believe I was even tagged in the first post because OH I asked the question that was answered by tagging you.  sooooo….try again? Also, Cristian is a one night stand type deal.  Sooo…we aren’t anything.  

if you tell me the question then we are back at square one, but if you decide not to tell me then I guess I’m doing something right, right?

You don’t listen very well.  One night stand doesn’t equal dating.  If it did then, honey, we gotta talk about your loyalty skills.  And honey, I don’t have to tell you the question to get out of this poor excuse for a date.  I can get up and walk away, which I think I’m actually going to do because I’m not as crazy as you make me feel.  

Hello hello! Fancy seeing you both at a bar again. How’s that date going, babes? Getting to know each other better?

Oh what’s up dude? date? i don’t know about date. just people catching up. I think I need to be… anywhere else, but here. 

Oh come on, baby boy. No need to act naive since I’m here too. I’m sure you’re both having a lovely time so why don’t you sit your ass back down and stop acting like a fucking child.

Jon.  I have a phone.  I can read online posts.  Hard to believe, but I am literate as fuck. Actually…I believe I was even tagged in the first post because OH I asked the question that was answered by tagging you.  sooooo….try again? Also, Cristian is a one night stand type deal.  Sooo…we aren’t anything.  

if you tell me the question then we are back at square one, but if you decide not to tell me then I guess I’m doing something right, right?

You don’t listen very well.  One night stand doesn’t equal dating.  If it did then, honey, we gotta talk about your loyalty skills.  And honey, I don’t have to tell you the question to get out of this poor excuse for a date.  I can get up and walk away, which I think I’m actually going to do because I’m not as crazy as you make me feel.  

Hello hello! Fancy seeing you both at a bar again. How’s that date going, babes? Getting to know each other better?

[txt msg]: where you at? the great daddy Andy will come save the day

[txt msg]: doing the lord’s work or whatever. you’re welcome

@secretlyvanillaperfection – to answer your question, @ringaroundtheposie and @yojonathan give the biggest vibe for that. #sorrynotsorry

hmm. what kind of vibes am I giving off? what’s the dare?

Take izzy on a date that doesn’t end in fucking and maybe I’ll tell you

you’re joking right? like.. actually getting to know her?

Or you could just live forever in suspense. One date with little Bella isn’t even the worst I could dare you, dude

@secretlyvanillaperfection – to answer your question, @ringaroundtheposie and @yojonathan give the biggest vibe for that. #sorrynotsorry

hmm. what kind of vibes am I giving off? what’s the dare?

Take izzy on a date that doesn’t end in fucking and maybe I’ll tell you

Alright, I’ll bite. Whatcha want me to do to get the question, pretty lady?

@absolutelyamara… I mean she’s one of the finer ladies at this resort. Let’s hope her taste in people matches her good looks 

Well hello.  You are pretty stunning as well.  We should get together some time, you in?

Hit me up any time you’d like, baby girl. My door’s always open for a cute young fling

I’m slightly concerned that you took me seriously on the queen thing.  He said its at the club.  Last minute put out a general invite type thing.  

Eh, haven’t you always used those dumbass titles anyways? What’s the difference now? Alright, I’ll see if anyone else wants to go. Hope it’s not a lame flop

Aw, you recognize my queen status! I’ll reconsider…this once.  On a serious note, are you coming to this joey guys party thing?

Girl, no that wasn’t a— Whatever. You’re queen and I’m a daddy. Didn’t know there was one going on. Point me in the direction and I’ll be there

Oh no, don’t kill me, dear darling Bella! Then we can never get those mimosas

that currently isn’t present me’s issue.  Future me can deal with that problem.  

Oh no, what ever should I do! Thottie queen Bella, I beg you to reconsider

Oh no, don’t kill me, dear darling Bella! Then we can never get those mimosas