The Random Academic

honey is the only food product that never spoils. there are pots of honey that are over five thousand years old and still completely edible

i also want to point out we know it tastes the same even after thousands of years b/c archaeologists who discovered two thousand year old honey tasted it. presumably right after they looked at each other and went “what the hell here goes nothing”

I’m pretty sure they also identify human remains by taste. Archaeologists are straight up freaks.

mai nam is jane and wen i dig i fynde some roks both smol and big i put my tung upon the stone for science yes i lik the bone

I want to add a photo for this poem but Tumblr doesn’t want me to add the pic of my licking a rock I found on the ground at the Catacombs in Paris...

I need to make a sticker of this little poem and put it at the front of all my books. Well, and change the name I guess.

As a English speaker learning French, this makes me feel a whole lot better about my skills.

I can’t even hear individual words in French so I think they’re doing a good job all things considered.

I love the guy who you can tell has actually has studied english, knew that Massachusettes was a state, etc, because he kept going “Oh, that one sucks, I hate that one.” He’d still pronounce it right, but you could tell it physically pained him XD

“Square friend”

Aw man, if only they did ‘Turtle’...