Depressed emo

i hate when songs are like 2 minutes and 46 seconds long. bro where are you going i was just getting to know you

My mental state is: If you give me a long hug I might start crying.

I think about the night we ended. I think about the drop in my stomach, the deleting of pictures, the tears streaming down my face, but I always think about what you did that night. Did you cry? Or did you feel relieved? That night was the most painful night of my life but it was probably just a normal one for you.

"I always knew you weren’t mine to keep. That’s why I kissed you an extra thousand times and told you it was just an old habit. That’s why I always gazed an extra few seconds before I looked away and that’s why I stayed up all those nights to watch you sleep instead of getting any rest myself. I tried to memorize every curve and mark on your body so that when you left I would not forget. I listened extra carefully when you spoke because I knew I needed to replay your voice when I was alone. That’s why I told you I loved you as much as I did and I always held you as close as I did. You pressed your body against mine and I knew someday your scent would linger on my sheets but you would not be there to hold me close anymore. I knew one day I would wake up alone. So I took in your warmth and cried in your arms, but you never knew what it was about. I ran my finger through your face and moves my hands back to your body to cherish every inch of your skin. I watched you dream and knew I would never get to watch you change and grow because sometimes in life things are only built to break. I cherished you all I could but you still left and I’m starting to wish I never memorized you."

I still remember the way my heart sank when you told me you no longer wanted to be with me. What’s funny is that I saw it coming, you were acting so different in the end. Yet, I still wasn’t prepared for that heartbreak. Genuinely the worst feeling ever, watching someone fall head over heels over you to wanting absolutely nothing with you. I just wish I could go back to the beginning, when I was all you ever wanted.