âIâve made it out
I feel weightless. I know that place had always held me down, but for the first time, I can feel the beauty I had hoped in. Itâs been three nights now, and my breathing has changed, itâs slower and more full. Itâs like the air out here is actually worth taking in.Â
I can see it back in the distance, and Iâd be lying if I said it wasnât constantly on my mind. I wish I could turn that fear off, but maybe the further I go, the less that fear will affect me. I feel betrayed by what I assumed was home - if I ever end up back there, I wonât be able to look at it the same way.Â
They are asleep. They are so sure that they know the truth, and carry on throughout their day with the same meaningless task. Theyâve forgotten to look up, and to look outward, to understand that this isnât about âin there.âÂ
This is about âout here.â
This new world surrounds me. I used to think the walls back home were massive - these green hills engulf me and place me right in the middle_ Trench is quite precautious at times, and itâs to grow weary. But itâs real and itâs true and Iâd much rather endure reality than to mindlessly be obedient to a life that someone created for me. Iâve obsessed about this world for so long, that it feels more like home than anything Iâve experienced. Somehow, in the vast openness, I feel more protected than ever.
The landscape feels endless, and I found myself walking for hours without any true evidence of getting further down. But Iâve seen plants and colors out here that Iâm not sure Iâve witnessed before. Thereâs a beauty in the strangest places - and the curiosity of whatâs next continues to motivate me.Â
I wonder who else is out here. If what I assumed inside is true, thereâs got to be more like me. Sometimes Iâll feel a presence, or think I see something in my peripheral, only to look up and see nothing. Itâs just another thing that Iâm afraid of that also excites me. It all just confirms all of the things that I hoped to be true for all of this time. I am out here and I am very alive. Iâm sometimes scared, but always discovering something new, and I will not stop. Cover me!
-Clancyâ






















