Ms. Darcy

OOOOH! I WANNA GO, MOMMY! TAKE ME, PLEASE!

Well then let's go you silly goose!

I love you too, Mommy, forever and ever.

So, do you know any four year olds who might want to go get ice cream? Or should I go all by myself?

You’re my everything, Mommy. I know you do your best. It’s ok, Mommy, I won’t ask again. I’m sorry, Mommy, please don’t cry, I love you too.

I love you so much. 

That still doesn’t give me anyone to cuddle on Father’s Day, Mommy. Feeling someone isn’t the same as them actually being there.

Trust me I know. But I will always be here for you. I know I can't be both mommy and daddy but I will try my hardest to be everything for you, Nat. I really will. I love you sweetie. 

Every birthday and every Christmas I just wish for Daddy, but I never get him.

I know, baby girl. I know. I wish there was something I could do. But there's nothing I can do. You just have to feel him in your heart. Remember how Jude taught you that? Feel Daddy. Dream about Daddy. Think about Daddy.

Why can’t we leave them but Daddy can leave us? I just want to see my Daddy again, Mommy. Take me to see my Daddy, please. I just want my Daddy. Didn’t he love us?

Nattie I wish I could. I really wish I could.

You could pass away too, Mommy, we could just fall asleep together just like we did when I was smaller. And then we could go up to Heaven and be a family again!

Nattie, we can't just pass away. That would be really bad. What about your friends? And Jude? And Fluke? And Chelsea? What about everyone here? We can't leave them.

It makes sense, Mommy…. Can’t I pass away too? To see them? It’s like going to sleep right? You could just tuck me in and I could fly up to go see Daddy and Uncle Jamie and all the pretty angels.

No baby, I can't have you pass away too. You have to stay right here with me, okay? 

Why not? I hear Heaven’s nice! The nice old man at the church says so. Can’t I go there?

Nattie...do you remember how I said that Uncle Jamie and Daddy have passed away? That means that they can never come back and we can never go visit them. When we pass away we can go see them...but we can't see them an time before that. Does that make sense, honey?

B-but I have 75 cents! Maybe I should go up there and see him! Can you send me to him, Mommy?

No baby. I can't.

Can I save it up to pay God to send Daddy back?

No, Nattie...it doesn't work that way. Daddy's up there with God forever. We can't bring him back.

Alrighty mommy!

I love you too baby. Maybe not for college...but save it for something you really want. 

Then I’ll pay you in hugs and kisses ok, mommy, whenever you need one for forever! College? Are you sending me away already, mommy?

I could use one of each right now! No of course not! But college is expensive. You're gonna need that 75 cents.

But I don’t pay you, mommy! I have 75 cents in my piggy bank, I know it’s not a lot, but I think you deserve it.

Oh hush you. You keep that 75 cents. You should save it for college.

I thought your job was to help crazy kids!

I have two jobs. But my main job is to be your mom and to teach you things so you grow up smart and nice and great. 

you all ways teech me lotz mommy!

That's my job, silly!