one good turn deserves another

pov you are the poolboy at the vampire mansion and actively drowning

BAGPIPES?

(totally insane, beyond saving) Ok well that was obviously a classic gerardian recreational retch not a burp and if they were real fans they would know that

being single sucks [remembers that romantic love isnt the gleaming beacon of salvation that will fix the chasm within me] #mychasm #isupportmychasm [remembers not to trivialize my emotions] but it is painful to never have been deemed worthy of that kind of lasting love [remembers how many incels there are] but honestly you should be totally self-sufficient and never want anything ever [remembers that im evil] im evil

croissant seeking behavior