It's happening inside your head

my very photogenic orange muse

@thepittmonth: Week 2  relationships, friendships, and dynamics

We had this service the other week and everything just went bad. You know, from jump, the weather, everything, you know. It was just...it was bad. And it's really nothing I haven't seen before. Everything goes bad in restaurants, I think. By design, there's something completely untenable about them. It's a dangerous profession. It's a nerve-racking profession. It's just very, um...it's very hard. But the obstacles, the hurdles, that's kind of...that's the juice. You know? And you get this real sense of accomplishment and success, but that just lasts for a minute because then you have to do the exact same thing, the exact same way, with a new set of obstacles the next day. And I think for a long time, I, um— Sorry, the better way to say that would be the whole time I've been doing this thing, I think I just...I wanted to get to the end of the day. Like I just wanted to get through that shit. Like I wanted to, um...survive it. And I...I didn't want to know my co-workers. I didn't care to care for them. I just, I saw them as tools to help me survive in the kitchen. And the other day...I mean, it really was, it was the worst service I have ever been apart of, just a complete and utter shit show. And it wasn't the staff, you know, it was these circumstances. And um, I know that if I had been in charge, if I had been the head chef, I would've made it worse. Like I would've survived, but, um, I would've made it unpleasant, because that's the way the job had made me feel. That's the way I had made myself feel. [...] And, um, this service...Everybody cared so much, and everybody tried so hard, and everybody loved so much. It didn't feel like one person trying to survive, it felt like a group of people supporting each other, trying to lift each other up. And as crazy as it got, and it did get crazy, and as out of control as it could've gotten...It never did. And just getting to watch everybody just, like, score. That was so great. Like even though it sucked, it was like...it was the most fun I've ever had.

patricia and her pet mayor 🐕‍🦺