Alien Porn Unlimited

1. Safeword

2. Sub/dom drop

3. Loosing intrest halfway through

4. Trying something that doesn't work

5. Medical emergency (bonus points: it happens during bondage)

6. Bad/failed orgasm

7. Should have safeworded

8. "Wait, it's not supposed to hurt?"

9. "Let's never try that again."

10. Sex so bad they break up after

11. Realistic shower sex

12. Incompatible kinks

13. Threw up on that thang

14. Can't get hard/wet/aroused

15. Says wrong persons name during sex

16: ugly crying/overwhelmed

17: "I remembered you being better at this"/"I'm not impressed."/"I've had better."/"You're not hung chill"

18: Allergic reaction/cut off circulation

19. Dirty talk/degradation gets too real

20. Ignored/missed a safeword

21. Random horny confession that kills the mood for the other person/people

22. "No really, that's not going to fit."

23. Fire alarm goes off/interrupted by a third party

24. Pushing themselves into sex they aren't ready for

25. Sex toy gets stuck

26. Only one person having fun/agreeing to boring sex

27. Couple brings in a bad 3rd

28. Sex in a bad location

29. Sex so bad it kills you/one of the participants dies

Yvgeny learns how each of the marines are in bed.

Bethael: Surprisingly, hes shy about these sort of physicalities. The hound is extra careful not to injure the little human with his passions. But more and more Bethael is finding out just how hardy a mortal can still be. And those teeth...

Byzanti: Hes a Slaaneshi. Really that should be explanation enough. More specifically, Byzanti knows as many routes to pleasure as he does secrets. Yvgeny never knows what hes getting into when he joins with Byzanti but its almost a guarantee it will hurt in the best ways.

Lyphos: For being a psyker made of merely bone and sand, he's extremely physical. Small touches on the shoulder, a held hand, a tucking of hair behind the ear, all make Yvgeny feel spoiled with attention. The little touches don't stop when Lyphos enters his mind and caresses his subconscious, delicately magnifying stimuli, making those little touches feel like fire against his skin. And don't get him started about the reverberating voice drowning out everything else.

Bethael: Responds really well to positive feedback...really well. You could get this boy hard and red as a cedar mast with firm commands alone- and when he's feeling like he can't control himself, Yvgeny learns to step back and order him around until he's tired out. Sit. Stay. Watch me. Hell, slap a collar on him to make sure he stays put! His whining is all bark, no bite. The biting comes later, as a treat for his behavior, of course.

And as with any overexcited pup- sometimes you gotta break out the toys! A bit and muzzle made of chain to keep his mouth busy so he can't nip. A nice saddle for him to grind against when he's sitting and staying.

Byzanti: Loves the thrill, loves the climb, loves the climax, and loooooves the aftercare. Byzanti might push his partners to their very limits (and not infrequently over them) but he makes it no secret that his own little post-coitus treat is getting off on treating them. He'll rail out Yvgeny's brains under a bespoke cocktail of ecstasy-heightening drugs, and then? Hand-feeding him grapes. Wash and re-braid his hair. Foot massage. A five-star spa treatment! Indulgence is the name of the prince, and indulgences he shall deliver!

Also vibration play VIBRATION PLAY. Putting the noise in noise marine, playing subsonic notes to buzz and rumble his armor and the bones of any eager mortals. Not to mention millenia worth of collected toys to thrum, hum, and shake! ZZZZZZZZZZZMMMMM

Lyphos: Every eager to show off his psychic control, of course he loves probing the minds of his partners- especially their sensory capabilities...and if he's very lucky, he gets to wear them like a glove. Like slipping out of his own body (bones and ever-shifting sand) and into warm flesh, the sensations all familiar yet so distant he's surprised every time. Every little thing in the living body delights him- from the way the diaphragm twitches when he laughs using someone else's mouth, to the taste of salty sweat licked from a soft lip.

Which, of course, makes him a perfect third participant. Sliding into someone else's neurological system, to share their sweet pleasure (and spicy pain) while they're getting used by someone else, all psychic orders and aftershocks. Plus, the more people focused on him the better!

Also I just HAVE to say I assume he can feel the bones because they're being held together through SHEER WILLPOWER but like. I bet if you got a really good chomp on one of his ribs he'd yelp instinctively.

Someone should grab his bones like this:

Sefice: Sefice...doesn't care much to participate in my headcanons either. He's patient, quiet, he likes to watch and wait and counts- maintaining careful track of everything. If asked nicely, he'll even give firm suggestions, or time out how long every individual act takes- all for posterity, of course. His real time to shine, though, comes afterwards...during the cleanup. Well. "Cleanup" for a certain definition. Someone has to lick those precious defiling fluids off the mattress and floor, after everyone's wrung out and done.

And because you know I'm a monster tongue truther...he can politely ask and subsequently enjoy the sweat and spunk off their bodies :) Of course, lets not forget his dear sweet

Lucetrix: I'm going to be horny for Lucetrix and no-one can stop me. Lucetrix is Sefice's attendant, his handmaiden, his devotee, his pleasure is hers, and her pleasure is his, naturally...Lucetrix lives to serve, and serve she does! With clever (and surprisingly strong) hands to put to work, Lucetrix has no shame and medical training- so whenever someone needs a fresh squirt of lube, their hair held out of their face, or just someone to sit on the sidelines with Sefice and excitedly cheer and croon, she's there!

But also. ALSO. This messy bitch absolutely begs to get degraded and wrung out like a dish towel. All she needs is someone to spit in her mouth to send her into ecstatic, divine paroxysms. Lucetrix [handshake emoji] Bethael out here like tell me what to do tell me what to do i'll be good i'll be good i'll be so so so so soooooo good and then you can stomp on me afterwarrrrrrrrd

To quote the song "Yeah it hurt/but it was worth it/now you know I'm not faking!"