Sphinx of black quartz, judge my vow

idk i would personally rather give up access to certain products seasonally or locally than have people enslaved to give me the ability to have any product any place any time. i think i can go without tomatoes in january.

young old person tip for you all. go get some photos printed (pauses so someone can say bogos binted) and fill out a physical album

and annotate them with who is in the photos and when and where the photos were taken!!! your extended family 50 years from now will be grateful, and so will you if you end up forgetting any details

(sprints into room late, looking harried and frantic as fuck) bogos binted. did I miss it

when you eat a Normal Sandwich (bread meat greens cheese relish) and your body goes ooohhh fuck! oh fuck! what have you done! heartbeat GO! sweating GO! temperature GO! like sorry man I'm just trying to keep you WORKING!!!!!!!! ASS HOLE!

Me with kiwis (apparently they aren’t supposed to make your mouth feel fuzzy (without the skin obviously))

it will never not FREAK me out that people outside aotearoa don't call them kiwiFRUIT. I saw this in my notes with initially no context and got VERY NERVOUS that you were chowing down on an extremely endangered and precious native bird

EYAGHAHAH

I’m so proud of senshi for making it so far in the tumblr sexyman poll. I think it’s so beautiful that tumblr has reached a point where a short fat hairy bearded man is the pinnacle of sexuality for a large swath of this userbase. it’s like when you see before & after pictures of a rainforest recovering from deforestation. nature is healing and we can fight god

I hope he wins so someone will have to explain to ryoko kui what a tumblr sexyman is

I have to say I forgot the onceler’s thing was cutting down trees when I made my metaphor.

This is poetry. This is storytelling. You can leave the sound off if you want but. Stop. Watch. You surely will not regret doing so.

"focaccia, serves 4" yes all 4 me

"tiramisu, serves 2" yes all 2 myself

“pizza, serves 8” yes I 8 it all.

"dog residue" post means so much to my ocd