Alavas

Your heart is not true enough to enter the gates of Margaritaville

My heart was heavier than the feather; I am sentenced to Rainforest Cafe

video game with a flaccid -> boner meter in the ui but the whole game it never changes at all and nothing makes the boner meter go up so youre jusg aware of the protags flaccid penis the whole time for no good reason

to be clear in my thinking this would only work in a completely nonsexual game, of course it Could have a function in some sort of porn game depending on the sorta porn youre going for but thats not really my idea here. this concept only works to me if its completely useless and unrelated & the protag isnt even sexualized even a little bit, otherwise i think it loses its charm. you just have to know about their penis and you have to wonder why the entire game and you have to try and figure that out until you realize theres no reason and youre just aware of their penis because the dev is probably fucked in the head or something like that. and then by that point youve reached the highest level of connection possible with a game developer aside from maybe ambushing them from behind and drinking all their blood until they die. and thats how we fix the gaming industry

IT’S MARCH

Uh… It’s still May…

It’s august

There's something to be said about making it to the date when a story of total universal nuclear devastation has been set and still being here.

i always reblog pro wasp propaganda to spite my phobia

it's cool how in the 6 years since this tweet was written it's become significantly less useful not because anything has gotten better but because the majority of products on Amazon are now from fly-by-night brands called "ZZPORK" and "GLUM4PANT"

you dont have to be a parent to understand the horror of walking into a room to discover that the baby crawled out of his crib and onto that pottery wheel you forgot to turn off, and while the baby is spinning around and around, the dog is sitting there all calm, like a person, gently using his paws to fashion the babys soft cartilage head into something a little more modern.  it might be the classic tale of bad parenting, but lets see where the dog is going with this

This post is from 2013. It has less than 100 notes. Together we can revive this work of art that tragically ahead of its time. We’re ready for it now