Nikolais Kin

Wow havent posted on here 8 months… thats when you know im mentally sound!

guess who just hit 20k stories posted on instagram (me. its me. im normal)

crashing out to christmas songs from the 60s is one of life's simple pleasures.

Sometimes I am just three different gnomes in a trenchcoat

i havent had such a deep craving for nachos in a long time and i know we have absolutely no nacho ingredients in my humble abode so genuinely what do i do with myself

Firmly shut a chapter on my life and am very at peace with that decision yk like things ended I was chilling and its now trying to come back. Like genuinely I dont know what to think anymore I believed I got the clarity and clarification to end things but APPARENTLY NOT 😹😹 silly me for moving on ig. Whatever guess this is back

Oh to be some posh fucker wearing a suit. That fucking coat nigel has. Whatever. I dont care i dont even care its not like all my life ive literally just always wanted to be a guy LMMAAOOOOOOOO 😹😹😹😹😹😹😹😹😹😹😹😹😹😹😹😹😹 ok. I literally only think its because i wish I was raised one. I wish i could hold myself the way they did and it not be seen as awkward i wish it wasnt frowned upon for me to act this way when I know i wouldn’t get a second thought had I been a guy. Im glad I was raised like this, theres obviously a lot of downsides and I hate the upper hand they get just because of their gender but ive never really felt true to myself but i dont think even if i became trans i would feel true to myself then either i feel so incredibly alien and foreign that no matter my gender expression theres not much I can do to fix it. So i just stick with who I am right now with not many qualms but just have to deal with the occasional life threatening desire to live that life that im never going to get the chance to.

I hate being sensitive i try to rip it out of me but it never works im destined to always take things too seriously it doesnt fucking matter i just get my hopes up i just take things the wrong way its mever intentional i just always feel like im being targeted i need to sort this out i cant keep feeling like this

I need to play arknights (cant play arknights)

I love taking a breath in and hearing my neck crack like 10 times