Aixuin

Monkey D. Luffy

-Before you guys even began your relationship, you’d always been less social than the other crew members. Sticking to yourself and kinda isolating yourself. Luffy would often find you sitting under a shaded part of the sunny, admiring the sea view. Or in your cabin sleeping.

-Since Luffy is a bit of a social guy, he was definitely confused about your pastimes. He’s normally try and drag you to come play with him which you agree (since he’s the captain lol).

-Luffy might be dumb but he is emotionally intelligent, can see right through you. As you play wrestle with him, Luffy feels how your body simply doesn’t put up a fight, nor your voice. Of course he sees you giggling and laughing. He sees you having fun! But, he can’t quite understand why your body isn’t agreeing with your head.

-This odd quirk of yours interests Luffy quite a lot. It makes him determined to make you happy both physically and mentally! Thus he continues to hang out with you more, even if that means just sitting next to you.

-Luffy eventually begins to gain a bit of a puppy crush. He is head over heels for you! He thinks you’re the coolest, most awesome person on his crew. There is no reason he wouldn’t love you, or any of the crew.

-If you ever told him ‘you’re not in the mood to play’ he would totally respect your decision but would complain and whine about how much he misses you to whoever was closest.

-When he confessed his love to you, it was a spur of a moment thing. His confession came up randomly as you guys were playing a very heated game of tag. Running all over the sunny dodging and ducking from Luffy. Alas, you cannot escape the rubber man. He flings towards you crashing you both to the ground.

-When the adrenaline wore off (which was in a split second), Luffy immediately got worried. He didn’t want you to be hurt. “Y’ ok?” His voice was firm, hands grabbing the back of your head and moving it around to check for any injuries.

-Once he knew for certain that you were ok he just hugged you oh so tightly and said, “I love you so much.” You felt your body heat up for a moment, then that fire went out as soon as it came. You hug him back and respond. “I do as well.”

-Luffy’s realization of your tendencies was a bit of a rocky journey. He loves physical touch, like wrapping his arms around you or just coming up towards you to give a quick kiss on the cheek. Luffy saw how you reacted to it. He saw how you’d sometimes lean away when he tried to kiss your cheek, or how you’d excuse yourself and pry his arms off of you.

-Even when it comes to more intimate aspects, you always seem to dodge the scenario entirely. You never initiate any type of romantic action towards him, hell sometimes you don’t even accept his! He doesn’t mind though. As long as he can see you and his crew happy, he is happy.

Vinsmoke Sanji

-His love confession was the most extravagant thing ever. Candle lit dinner with your favorite dish served. Sanji couldn’t think of anything more romantic for you. I mean it’s quite private and there isn’t too much happening around. He hopes that this quiet atmosphere will help you stay long enough for them to actually confess.

-Your reaction was… appreciative. You knew what this could mean. Romance was never a strong suit for you. The fire dies out as soon as it was lit. Though you couldn’t decline such a kind gesture so you try to play along.

-This ‘Playing along’ thing has gotten quite far to the point where Sanji calls you his partner. To be honest, you couldn’t reject them. You do love him truly, and you could tell they’re deeply in love with you. His demeanor softens when you’re around. Their heart races just by looking at you.

-Sanji realizes your quirks about a month into the relationship. You begin to distance yourself, not terribly. Though just enough for Sanji to Notice. You no longer stay after you guys clean the kitchen. You no longer sleep next to them. You no longer initiate physical contact. He begins to worry quite a lot. Wondering if maybe the crew is getting too much for you and that you need more alone time.

-Thus Sanji begins to prepare your meals at different times than the rest of the crew, but he’s still always there, touching you, giving soft kisses worrying over you. Seeing that the reaction from them doing this just made everything drastically worse he decided so ask.

-“My love, what’s the matter?” Sanji kneeling down grasping your hands gently, kissing your knuckles. “Please tell me, i’m so worried about you. Did I do something to upset you?” Their voice was quiet as desperate as they ask you. Your body was tense during the whole situation. Hands shaking.

-“Sanji, you did nothing wrong. I think i’m the one who’s wrong.”

-After a long talk and explanation on your emotions, Sanji understood what was happening. In simple terms, he was overwhelming. But is he were to truly say it how it is, you don’t love the way he does. Their love comes in by romantic gestures and words. Things that are easily understood. You were more complicated. You never had the want to kiss anyone or touch them in a romantic sense.

-This raging difference between you and Sanji causes many road bumps. Sanji craves romantic affection. They always tell you how good you look, and how lucky they are. He often still comes up from behind and kisses you gently. Me never wraps his arms around your waist, only your shoulders. He doesn’t kiss you ok the lips. Sanji only ever will kiss your cheek, only after he asked. You accept these kind actions. Maybe even lean into them on special occasions—fully indulging in their desire to love you. Even if that means getting in bed with him and touching eachother. You still love him, you want to do what makes them happy too.

Roronoa Zoro

-The first time Zoro met you, he knew you were different. In some weird way his body reacted to you. His pulse quickened. Perhaps it was just him being nervous? Zoro was never nervous, right?

-Though time and time again he would find himself staring at you for long periods of time. His heart beating fast. His eye would follow you even as he’s working out. Plus he kinda hates you for distracting him so much.(not)

-You guys would eventually find yourselves hanging up in the crows nest. You just for the peace and quiet. Zoro always let out an annoyed scoff but in reality he was delighted for you to be near.

-One evening, you bring up two bottles of Sake for Zoro (most of it for Zoro) and yourself.

-The night carries on as you both drink in silence with the occasional drunken babble from you which made Zoro chuckle. God why did you have such an effect on him? Then with his heightened confidence due to the sake, he comes closer to you, grabbing your face, pulling you into a kiss.

-Aaaand that was his confession. A tipsy kiss. You didn’t particularly pull away either. That in itself confused him slightly. He always thought you might’ve had a thing for him. You always brought him food when he forgot to come down to eat. Always was there for him to. His thoughts the next day were a jumbled mess of anxiety and stress.

-Thankfully you didn’t seem to really change what you did after the fact. For the next week you guys continued the way things were until you spoke up about what happened that night as he was getting ready to take a nap.

-“Why did you kiss me, Zoro?”

-God his body tensed up so quickly snapping his neck to look at you, his face clearly showing signs of being embarrassed. Grumbling under his breath he finally began to talk.

-He admits that he does like you—loves you even. Zoro felt so vulnerable as he expressed his feelings to you. Nervous of how you might respond. Luckily for him, you hug him. Straddling his lap and giving him a hug. Maybe not particularly the most smart move on your part but you made it work.

-He freezes for a moment, trying to wrap his head around you being on his lap and touching you. Oh my god he’s touching you. Zoro didn’t know what else to do really other than wrap his strong arms around your waist and pull you closer to him. He mumbles under his breath

-“Love ya.”

-His voice was soft compared to his normal tone. It was sweet even. He kisses your jaw gently compared to his grip around your waist then decides that you’re taking a nap with him in the crows nest.

-A month after you guys established your relationship he FINALLY began to realize how you were odd. I mean you never really kissed him but you wouldn’t reject his affection. You always care for him too? Even when he initiated sex, you wouldn’t complain. It’s just you never initiate.

-At first he didn’t think much of it until Ussop found out by “coincidentally”seeing how you never kissed Zoro. Ussops take on your behavior was that you perhaps didn’t like him. Zoro didn’t believe what Ussop was saying. Deciding to go to you directly.

-“Kiss me”

-Zoros voice rang through the crows nest. He honestly scared the shit out of you making you yelp. Then looking at him confused

-“What the f—, I mean ok.”

-You go towards his and grab his hand, placing it on your cheek and kissing his rough palm. Your eyes looking at him with a genuine expression. He could see it in your eyes. You love him deeply. Perhaps not in a way people thing love is. You love him in your own way. Zoro let out a contempt sigh, his thumb gently caressing your cheekbone.

-“Thank you for accepting my love.” you mumble

-Zoro kisses your forehead gently happy to know that you love him.

Loud and cruel footsteps dominate the eerie quietness of the halls. Picking up his heavy footsteps, your body moves on its own tensing up as you can practically smell his rage. The clicks of his tailored shoes hitting the tile floor growing louder through the echoing hallway. But if you didn’t finish making dinner, he would be even more enraged. A loud slam then rings through the kitchen making you jump. You turn around to see your husband, jaw clenched tightly, a scowl on his face. You don’t even talk, just plate his food and place it on the island. Knowing how fragile Doflamingo is while pissed, you decide to give him space, and go check up on their child. The walk towards your child is cold, dark. Everything was towering. All the warmth that was once there is now the emptiness, a hollow shell. Opening the door to the child’s nursery was like a warm summer breeze. It’s as if someone painted the contrast between night and day. The sight of your beautiful child sleeping soundly in the crib is all you can see now. Their blond hair shimmered from the soft light of the rising moon. You wish to join your own child in moonlight’s embrace. Even if the world is cold, and dark you both can live happily in the silence of night. You retreat from the warmth of your child, wanting to get back to your husband. Giving one last glance to the one thing that fills your mind with joy, you leave that cozy feeling to be then surrounded by cold halls.

Swiftly making your way back to the kitchen you halt. You stand at the closed kitchen door, staring at it as you prepare for what might come behind it. Hopefully, your husband has calmed down. But from the deafening silence—it seems he’s not too happy. You brace yourself, opening the large door. Opening your eyes you see that your husband only ate a few bites. His body was tense, you saw the bent fork that was thrown on the floor. You open your mouth but before you could utter a single sound, he grabbed you by the neck. Doflamingo slammed you into the nearest wall, a devilish grin plastered on his face as he saw your fear. The air was knocked out of your lungs, the searing pain from the impact, all was so meaningless compared to the cruel man who has you pinned beneath him. His large hand gripped your delicate neck, making your eyes roll back. Doflamingo chuckles at your reaction before pulling you into a kiss. Your feet leaving the floor, dangling helplessly as he kissed you. You grab onto his wrist, digging into the skin as you try to ground yourself. Not a single ounce of life flowed through his veins. He was powerful. All you could do was squirm beneath his grasp. The choked gasps escaping your lips sounded like a woman pleading to spare her life. He smiled. Doflamingo then oh so kindly lets go of you, making you fall to the ground. Your neck burns from the tight grip. Before you were even able to catch your breath, a rough tug of your hair began to drag you across the floor. You scream from the sudden pain, thrashing as your loving husband drags you towards your shared bedroom. Doflamingo is a rough man, he doesn’t hold back when it comes to his beloved wife.

The soft light of the sunrise peaks through the curtains, laying a warm blanket across the bed. Everything was quiet, and at peace as the early morning came. It's around 4am and the piercing cries and shrills of the baby rings through the corridors. The silence of the approaching dawn is no more. The curtains have been cut open with a sharp knife.He scowls at the sound. That high pitched annoyance is calling again. Ringing in his ears as his arm was draped on top of his wife. Doflamingo groans, rolling to his back, looking up at the ceiling that maybe that child would just shut up. It never stopped even after what felt like forever. It seemed like his useless wife was not getting up anytime soon thus he had to go and take care of that child.

His presence looms over the crib, his hands clenching the crib bars before grabbing the crying baby. This powerful man somehow manages to be gentle with the child. Doflamingo scoops it up in his arms, holding it close to his chest so it’ll listen to the steady beat of his heart. He takes the child back to the shared room and sits on a too small rocking chair. It creeks beneath his weight, legs all over the place just to sit on the damn chair. He began to rock back and forth, soothing the upset child slowly but surely. The soft hums and coos of the fathers voice lulled the precious baby back to sleep. A sigh of relief is exhaled seeing that the child is asleep. Doflamingo shuts his eyes, yearning his head back to let the morning sun hit his tan skin. He doesn’t sleep, he just relaxes, enjoying the moment while it lasts.

Your ears pick up the soft creaking of the rocking chair. Groaning at the annoying sound you open your eyes. The sun was already saying hello to the world. You rub your eyes, attempting to adjust to see where the noise could’ve come from. To your surprise you see your husband holding the child, gently rocking back and forth. The poor dear is drooling all over Doflamingo, snoring quite loudly as well. Your husband’s big hand was splayed across the baby’s back. To your shock you also hear a slight snore from Doflamingo-never would you have expected to hear such an alert man snore. Your eyes lingers at this domestic picture of the child with their father. The rising sun peaking out gives a warm glow on the child. You couldn’t help but smile.

Doflamingo's ears caught the faint sound of his wife's awakening. His head still bent uncomfortably as the child continued to drool all over his chest. His eyes stared down his partner, and how utterly messy they looked at that moment. Marks all over her body which he made. Doflamingo is always looking for a way to mark his possessions. Time continued to slowly pass, only the sounds of soft breathing being heard. Until Doflamingo decided to chime in.

"You're up early dove. Was I not rough enough last night? Or are you just being stubborn."

His voice was cheery and held a sharp tone that felt like a knife to your throat. Doflamingo raised his head, cracking his neck in the process. His smile was unsettling, you felt utterly helpless.

"I hoped I wouldn't be disturbed this morning but here we are."

Doflamingo scoffed, continuing to rock in the small chair.

"You can make it up to me tonight. How does that sound dove?"

He then stood up, the child still held securely to his chest. Doflamingo took two strides and gently placed the child in the middle of the bed before joining you and the child. His large arm draped over both the child and you as he settled back down. You felt warm, your husband and child together in the same bed. Your heart swelled with happiness, soaking up all of this softness that Doflamingo barely showed.

The morning comes too soon and you stir away from the sound of your amazing husband getting ready to leave. He only had his pants on at the time, not even paying attention to his wife and child in the bed. You didn't want him to leave, not after that night. He was so gentle, you wanted more. You tugged on his arm in which he scowled at you, looking at you as if you were trying to deliberately annoy him.

"Could you take today off? Please?"

You asked him, your voice still strained from just waking up. Doffy laughs at your request, almost like he was making fun of it. It wasn't loud, but it was at the same time.

"Oh come oh now. You can't expect me to just take a day off on a drop of a hat."

He grabbed his shirt that was hanging off the chair putting it on as he continued to lecture his wife. God how could she be so dumb?

"You know I'm a busy man dear. Id love to spend time with you but I just can't"

More like Doflamingo didn't want to spend time with you.

"At least stay till I fall back to sleep, please?"

He rolled his eyes at your request as he grumbled some shit before scooping up the child and bringing it back to the nursery. Once he made it back towards the shared bedroom he laid back down next to you, his strong arms wrapped around you. Kissing your forehead gently and mumbling into your skin,

"You are such a needy woman."

Weeks have passed since their relationship bloomed. You’ve become much more lively and outgoing than before. So much life shined through and it spread to the rest of the crew. All of their big smiles and laughs echoed throughout the ship every day even in the toughest hours.

You still often tick back to old habits that were engraved into you. Apologizing for things you did not do or crying over a slight tone change. Those reactions were trained into you. What felt like years of constant pain and suffering had been reprogrammed to be felt like paradise. Whenever breaking it, you were punished and reticulated. It was hard to get rid of something that was trained into you.

Though ever since Sanji came into the picture, all was good. They always made sure to reassure you. Always saying that it was not your fault or warning you and communicating that he is upset;that he is not upset at you. Sanji never advanced onto you either despite his flirty personality. They always made sure if it was ok to touch you, always asking permission before continuing.

One evening when everyone was asleep there was a delivery which was a plushie. You bought one for your silly indulgences and you adored them a lot. A black cat plush which was larger than your head. You had to make sure to fluff up the little (big) guy before snuggling all night.

The next morning, all cheerful and happy because Sanji was coming back from shopping to restock the food supplies. When you heard the light footsteps that were traveling towards the kitchen you darted there to greet Sanji. In your excitement you ramble to him about the new plushie you just got. “I got a new plushie today! My 3rd black cat plushie to be exact!” Your face lit up in excitement and joy as you told Sanji about your silly indulgences. To your surprise, he took interest. “I would love to see it, my love”, they softly purred, which made you freeze for a moment. You felt so confused, astonished even—was this normal? Luckily someone else came into the kitchen snapping you out of shock. They were saving you from responding to Sanji at that moment. It was Nami. You looked at her before grabbing Nami and dragging her towards the women’s quarters where Robin was resting and reading a book. Closing the door with a kick causing it to slam. You forcefully sit Nami down to talk. You then looked at them with a confused expression and asked them, “Is this normal or am I going crazy?”

Both Robin and Nami were confused at this question due to not having any prior context. Thus you took a deep breath and began explaining quickly.

After explaining everything in a very frantic manner you asked the question again, “Is this normal or am I just not used to it? I just find it really odd that someone asks for such a thing with such manners—“

Getting cut off by a soft knock at the door all the girls got startled before opening the door to see Sanji standing there. “My dear, may I see the Cat plush? I am curious.” Their grin showed genuine interest and warmth. Again something you were perplexed about—why is he showing so much interest? Alas, you went to the bed where the plush was laying down and hugged it. You began to walk towards Sanji to show him the little (big) cat plush. The plush was big and soft all black except the eyes. You simply then turned the plush towards Sanji so that their eyes met with the push’s. He chuckled softly and patted its head.

“The biggest hug I would ever receive..” Sanji's hands travel down to the soft paws giving them a nice squish. “The eyes are like crescent moons. It is really cute! You should bring the little(big) guy whenever you want to cuddle. I bet he would enjoy some with you too.” Sanji then leaned down, stopping before his lips met your skin. You nodded and then they gently kissed your forehead “I will be cleaning up the kitchen, Goodnight dear. Goodnight to you ladies as well.” Sanji gave a flirty wink before closing the door and walking back to the kitchen.

“See what I mean? They’re being so polite over my stupid indulgences. I feel like most people would just not ask to see it and if they did give more of a short response like ‘cute’ or whatever. This is different, what is this?”You rambled as soon as Sanji's footsteps became faint.

Nami very quickly started with a more sad smile. “I think you are just not used to it—he is just being nice.” You gave a soft smile and then happily said “I love my partner.”

“And I can tell he loves you too.” Nami responded and then gave you a hug. Holding you tightly. Nami knew about your past and it broke her heart to know that someone as kind as yourself would be subjected to so much pain. Robins eyes peered over her book observing the situation. Her face was unreadable but you could tell she was scowling at the thought of your past relationship.

Something began to crack within your mind. As if walls were being broken down. Something began to strain within you. It left like you were getting slowly stabbed. Your chest felt heavy. This feeling was almost identical to how you felt that day. A sinking, dreadful feeling. Though this wasn’t dreadful. It was just so much of this feeling that it was suffocating.

“The difference between actually being loved vs. lusted over like your last partner.” Robin mumbled under her breath, her face still buried in her book. You heard Robin just enough. Her remark eased the tension in your shoulders you didn’t even know you had but then just made you even more confused. That simple sentence made you completely nonplussed. Eyes wide and hazed over trying to figure out what you’re feeling. Of course that is true but you could not understand why you felt so conflicted.

Then a soft creak of the door brought you back to reality to see Chopper. He was all groggy and wrapped up in a blanket. His fur all messy from him probably tossing and turning. Poor baby’s ears are way too good at hearing. “You guys were being loud… And I also wanted to say that what is happening to you is very wonderful and joyous.” He softly smiled at you and walked towards you giving you a piece of candy. It’s not often the little reindeer gives away his candy. He must’ve really wanted you guys to shut up. Chopper then yawned before making his way back to the ajar door and closing and making his way back to the bed. His small hooves echoing through the hall softly.

“I’m glad but also sad you realize you were lusted after. It’s so gross that it happens to people.” Robin said breaking her silence. Her eyes still not leaving the book. You sat down on the bed next to Nami with your hands in your lap still holding the piece of candy Chopper had given to you.

“I always knew I was lusted over—logically speaking, but I think mentally I felt like it was genuine love still. You guys made me realize that I am safe now. That it won’t happen anymore.” You were trying your best not to cry at that moment. You clenched your fist tightly that would probably leave some marks later on. The realization finally hit you like a truck. The walls fully broke, you felt reawakened. So much anxiety was finally lifted and it was rejuvenating. Your body trembled from the sheer amount of emotions that you were experiencing. Nami then flopped back onto the bed and sighed dramatically. “Jeez don’t you just love womanhood?” Nami quips to lighten your tension. To even further help she pulls you down with her making you let out a small yelp. She laughs and grabs your hands tightly to try and calm you down.

“I’m happy you’re in a better relationship now.”Robin smiled at you, closing her book to head off to bed.

Nami then grabs your face with both hands squishing it “Don’t let no stinky man treat you like that anymore! Bop that motherfucker!” She yelled a bit louder than she should have in your face. Nami let go before moving to try and catch some sleep. “You should also go to bed. You seem way too tense. Sleep it off.” Then Nami clicked off the light leaving the room in darkness. Your eyes wandered eventually leading to the cat plush. You then frantically grabbed the cat plushie and ran to the kitchen. You need to talk to him.

You were crying, tears pouring down your face blurring your vision. Though you got up too fast causing you to collapse from a sudden change in blood pressure while running. You had to thank him—you needed to tell them. You got back up and continued to make your way to the kitchen even as your body was telling you to sit down. That you where going to collapse if you didn’t. You had to thank Sanji. To thank him for truly loving you.

You bursted through the kitchen causing Sanji to get startled, dropping one of the plates they just cleaned into the skink. Thankfully it didn’t break. Seeing your very unstable frame he quickly wiped their hands in a towel before approaching you to make sure you do not fall. He still doesn’t touch you, grabbing the back of your shirt and leading you to a chair to sit down. They kneel in front of you before going to cup your face to see if you would back away. You instead accepted it. They cupped your face gently to get you to look at him. “Hey dear, is something wrong?” He tilted your head up and saw you puffy red eyes and the tear stained cheeks. They looked so worried for you and wiped your tears away with his thumb. “What happened to you, my love? What is on your mind?”

His voice was soft and gentle; so pure. Your arms hugged the poor plushie tighter. You look up at them and give him the biggest smile. “Thank you for loving me, Sanji.” You then broke down. Sobs of joy filled the kitchen. Smiling happily at your partner that finally made you truly realize that you are loved. That no longer will you only be loved as an idea.

Sanji smiled happily as tears began to form in his own eyes. They wipe theirs off with his sleeve. He looked at you with such love and care. Impulsively they hugged you and held you close. Realizing what he just did they began to pull away. Instead you hugged him back. Their arms then confidently wrapped around you. He was so happy to savor this beautiful moment with you.

“I love you. I am so happy for you. Thank you for sharing this moment with me. I love you for you. I’m following you so you no longer need to be scared. I cannot bear to see you in such a tragic state again. Your pain is something that never consumes you to that level.” Their face tucked into the cook of your neck as he softly reassures you. His gentle tone and the warmth of their body made you feel like you where worthy of living.

Sanji patted your head to soothe you, still holding you in a tight, warm embrace. After a few sniffles he pulls away. Their eyes were red and his cheeks slightly shining under the lights. He held your hands gently.

“My dear, please sleep with me tonight. I want to hold you as we drift off to sleep and dream of each other. I want you to have no fear of me sleeping in the same bed as you. Let me gently love you.”

You nodded and they swiftly picked you up in his arms and carried you to their room. Placing you gently on the bed before tucking you in. “I’m going to get ready for bed my love. I will only be a minute. I promise.”

Just as he said he came back within a few minutes and joined you on the bed. Carefully wrapping their arms around you and playing with the plush you were still tightly hugging. He hummed softly—continuing to hold you in a loving embrace. Their presence lulled you to sleep. You felt so safe with them. You didn’t need to worry anymore. He soon joined you, holding you tight. Always making sure, and even at night that you are comfortable. “I want to be different for you. No one deserves to be driven that low. People never should be punished for doing their best. Their best is the best that they can do. You are doing your best. I am so proud of you, my love. You have made it so far. I’m glad you’re back to feeling like yourself again. He pauses, thinking about his next words, "I know in the beginning you needed comfort in the way you understood. I gave it to you to help I knew it wasn’t the best for you but…at that moment it’s what you needed. Now you no longer feel the need to be loved that way. Know this, I will never be upset if you don’t want to be intimate with me anymore. I did not fall in love with you because of that. I fell in love with you as who you are. I love you, let us dream of each other.” You softly cried during his small ramble. Once he finished you turned around and gently kissed him. Even all over his face which made him chuckle a little.