.ᐟ✧ hello! you can call me aeyumi, aeyu, or yumi! twentys. she/her. asian american. isjf. leo. kitty mom. bad gamer. smut/fic writer. angst enthusiast. avid keyboard roller.
✧.˖ perpetually crying & throwing up over jjk, tot, wuwa, lnds, hsr. i currently write smut for love and deepspace and ikemen villains but potentially more fandoms to come! my fav characters are caleb, jude jazza, gojo satoru, choso kamo, luke pearce, jiyan, dan heng, and jing yuan.
.ᐟ✧ 18+ only. minors & blank blogs absolutely do not interact. you will be blocked.
✧.˖ before proceeding to my navigation, i'd like to bring attention the month long harassment i endured by izuwus: link / link 2
.ᐟ✧ THIS IS MY ONLY ACCOUNT. I WILL ONLY POST ON THIS ACCOUNT AND AO3. i am not @/aeyumicores or @/aeyumiicore or any variations of my blog name.
✧.˖ translations or reposts of my work on tumblr, ao3, or other sites ARE NOT permitted. please do not ask. do not reuse my blogpost headers, dividers, or layouts. these are original designs of my own, unless otherwise stated.
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hi guys i’ve been going back and forth on this in my mind and just wanted to share with you just where i’m at:
i really want to delete my blog. i’m still content-labeled and i have NO hope in tumblr in removing it. i’ve appealed it twice, crickets, as it usually is with tumblr support. it leaves a really bad taste in my mouth how tumblr is SO lacking in how they support its users.
back in 2024, they did help me out when i had that person impersonating/stalking/harassing me and i am VERY grateful for that. but when she continued to do so on a new account, they completely ghosted me. when that person started harassing my friend, because she defended me, they never responded to her and just let all of it continue. then, way after this incident, my friend gets wrongfully shadowbanned and they never responded to her.
so with the content label on my account, i just don’t feel encouraged to post any of my future work on here. it has never been about notes or engagement, but i also put a lot of time and effort into my writing, i care that people see it. i want people to see it. i’ve been writing for lads since feb2024, since the game’s release. i am incredibly proud of the community i’ve built and the genuine friendships i’ve made here. knowing that since i’ve been content labeled i get….maybe 5-10% people seeing my stuff, of what i used to get, like it just doesn’t make me want to be here nor support the platform that i do not feel like supports me (not you guys, but tumblr itself)
i’ve been very transparent, at this point of my life when i write it’s really not for myself. back when i first started it was definitely for myself as much as it was for everyone else. it was fun and such a good creative outlet for me. but it hasn’t been for some time. so of course, when i write, i want people to see and enjoy it. i’m not really afraid to admit that. it’s not about notes and engagement but i’m not ashamed or afraid to admit that … i put hours (literal weeks at this point with how long it takes me to write now) into it, of course i’m going to be upset when that feels like it gets put into the trash can because tumblr wrongly labeled my account, when i post the exact same type of content as most fandom creators.
i just don’t care to support a platform who just has such little care for its users. i understand tumblr staff is likely, as we all guess, tiny. maybe 50 people even. it’s somewhat of a dying platform (at least in my eyes. i could be wrong). but i would think that’d mean they put as much effort as possible into making what they have left as amazing as possible. but then there was that whole update with the reblogs thing which creators had to vehemently fight against to get it reverted? not implemented? i’m actually unsure how that whole thing ended.
that being said, i do have a new fic coming. i think i will post it on here and depending how terribly it goes i will probably make my decision whether or not i want to continue using tumblr. that could mean deleting my blog (because fuck tumblr) or just permanently signing out and uninstalling.
in both cases, all my writing is on ao3. but for smaus and lore stuff (if i delete my blog) it will go on my twitter and nothing else. even twitter though i’m moving away from. but it’ll all stay up. i don’t want that stuff to be gone forever. if i keep the blog up, i just won’t be posting anything new on here, and will be completely signed out.
i’ve seen some of my favorite lads blogs deactivate because of similar things (lack of support from staff, or just being mistreated on here which my anon inbox can defo attest to) and it makes me want to follow.
like i’m truly very in my ‘fuck you tumblr’ era. it does not feel like they give a shit about us.
i read every comment i just can’t respond to every single one bc its a lot (like its really emotional for me sdjjskdfnkj). thank you for taking the time to be so kind to me.
u guys make it rlly hard to commit to saying goodbye to tumblr for good
😓 Im so sorry for everything that Tumblr is doing to you and many writers, Yumi.
(I had sent u that other ask before seeing that announcment 😭💔)
Will you continue your writing journey on AO3?
Whatever you choose, I will support you fully from the sidelines! That being said, I will miss you sm, especially since I won't get to interact with you like this 💔😓 But it's important to do what's best for you!!! 💞
Thank you so much for your contributions to the community ❤️ I and so many others love you very much 💞
HELLO MY SWEETHEARTT i did get your other ask too hehe
if i write anything, which won’t be often (right now i have a wip i need to get through which is at 13k words and then i do want to do something for caleb’s birthday with an artist friend of mine), it will be posted on ao3! if it’s non-fic related (like smau) it will be on twitter
ugh that is part of the reason i am hesitant to just be done with tumblr i do love talking to the people who use it often. comments on ao3 and twitter are simply just not the same.
i love u ur support and sweet anons/checking up on me has ALWAYSSS brightened my day.
AAAAAAND ugh love pokopia though i haven’t picked it up in forever :’( playing lots of tft right now LOL
hi guys i’ve been going back and forth on this in my mind and just wanted to share with you just where i’m at:
i really want to delete my blog. i’m still content-labeled and i have NO hope in tumblr in removing it. i’ve appealed it twice, crickets, as it usually is with tumblr support. it leaves a really bad taste in my mouth how tumblr is SO lacking in how they support its users.
back in 2024, they did help me out when i had that person impersonating/stalking/harassing me and i am VERY grateful for that. but when she continued to do so on a new account, they completely ghosted me. when that person started harassing my friend, because she defended me, they never responded to her and just let all of it continue. then, way after this incident, my friend gets wrongfully shadowbanned and they never responded to her.
so with the content label on my account, i just don’t feel encouraged to post any of my future work on here. it has never been about notes or engagement, but i also put a lot of time and effort into my writing, i care that people see it. i want people to see it. i’ve been writing for lads since feb2024, since the game’s release. i am incredibly proud of the community i’ve built and the genuine friendships i’ve made here. knowing that since i’ve been content labeled i get….maybe 5-10% people seeing my stuff, of what i used to get, like it just doesn’t make me want to be here nor support the platform that i do not feel like supports me (not you guys, but tumblr itself)
i’ve been very transparent, at this point of my life when i write it’s really not for myself. back when i first started it was definitely for myself as much as it was for everyone else. it was fun and such a good creative outlet for me. but it hasn’t been for some time. so of course, when i write, i want people to see and enjoy it. i’m not really afraid to admit that. it’s not about notes and engagement but i’m not ashamed or afraid to admit that … i put hours (literal weeks at this point with how long it takes me to write now) into it, of course i’m going to be upset when that feels like it gets put into the trash can because tumblr wrongly labeled my account, when i post the exact same type of content as most fandom creators.
i just don’t care to support a platform who just has such little care for its users. i understand tumblr staff is likely, as we all guess, tiny. maybe 50 people even. it’s somewhat of a dying platform (at least in my eyes. i could be wrong). but i would think that’d mean they put as much effort as possible into making what they have left as amazing as possible. but then there was that whole update with the reblogs thing which creators had to vehemently fight against to get it reverted? not implemented? i’m actually unsure how that whole thing ended.
that being said, i do have a new fic coming. i think i will post it on here and depending how terribly it goes i will probably make my decision whether or not i want to continue using tumblr. that could mean deleting my blog (because fuck tumblr) or just permanently signing out and uninstalling.
in both cases, all my writing is on ao3. but for smaus and lore stuff (if i delete my blog) it will go on my twitter and nothing else. even twitter though i’m moving away from. but it’ll all stay up. i don’t want that stuff to be gone forever. if i keep the blog up, i just won’t be posting anything new on here, and will be completely signed out.
i’ve seen some of my favorite lads blogs deactivate because of similar things (lack of support from staff, or just being mistreated on here which my anon inbox can defo attest to) and it makes me want to follow.
like i’m truly very in my ‘fuck you tumblr’ era. it does not feel like they give a shit about us.
im dumb as hell cause i read that post and thought you made that guide on how to play the event and was like "i really didn't think it was that complex what am i missing"
im crying HAHAHA imagine they made an event that hard ...
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wont speak too much to this since I am not well versed with the bible but thats what it seems. he was born as a RESULT of mc which is why caleb is always a representation of mc. he is always a reaction to her, what she needs and wants. if shes self assured and independent, hes more insecure. if shes dependent on him, naive and vulnerable, he is more secure and less "yandere" (as in his insecure tendencies)
caleb is the one who seems to have been born/created as a result of mc, for her. in decoherence, he was used to heal her from battle, etc
in yin yang sundering I still believe he is meant to be eve, the lotus born from the original lotus as a result of self pollination or evolutionary split (or however bingdi lotuses are formed). which typically this lotus should be weaker, sustained only by the original lotus
but with netherlord calebmc, the issue is caleb took a role that was meant for mc, trying to protect her from that fate. but it was the reason they were in this perpetual cycle of death, hunger, and calamity.
some of my thoughts on yin yang sundering (TRUST ME THERE ARE MANY AND THEY ARE LONG) —
cw: spoilers to caleb's new myth and their dynamic in that myth (shared origin, siblings)
first, the cycle of guilt and pain caleb was doomed to continue repeating. i kept asking myself, why did caleb sacrifice himself in ch.9 when it’s almost a direct repeat of what happened the first time, when he first created the nether realm, taking mc’s place.
he was caught in a cycle where he’d do what he thought was right to protect his beloved sister, but then he had to live with the guilt of the consequences that it had on mc.
her turning into the very thing he wanted to keep away from her. a vengeful, blood-thirsty ghost. the constant ache and hollowness her hunger left her with (a hunger that stemmed from her unable to fulfill her full duties as the chosen lord of the nether realm—because caleb took that role), and subsequently, viewing herself as a monster
and this cycle would start and end with his death. all so she could survive, in a world he kept alive just for her
her hunger itself even turned into an endless cycle where she took and took from caleb, the lotus pond he built for her, needing him to find and feed her souls, cultivating with her. and he willingly, happily, gave her everything, but it doesn’t change the fact that she survived off of him.
even when they enter mt. dingxu, caleb has to LITERALLY give mc breath. the yin energy is eating away at the yang energy. its not sustainable
and so it really made me think, why would caleb do this? he’s smarter than that. why would he repeat an almost identical solution that would be temporary?
i think, maybe it goes back to their shared origin, twin lotuses that may have been born as a result of self-pollination. one of the lotuses is typically weaker, relying on the “parent” lotus to sustain it
as adam, mc would be the dominant parent lotus. as eve, caleb would be the weaker offspring lotus. but that is clearly not the case in yys. caleb is clearly the stronger one and mc is the weaker one that feeds off of him, relies on him. the roles have inverted. why?
because caleb assumed the position of the netherlord. the very position the heavens CHOSE mc for. and because he did this, saving her from certain death, it also hurt her in ways he probably didn’t imagine. in ways she didn’t even understand
and so it was an endless, unsustainable, cycle of give and give. of pain and guilt.
self pollination isn’t good for long term evolution and adaptation, often leading to dead end and extinction. and caleb could not break out of that cycle, maybe that’s one of his punishments. doomed to repeat this tragic cycle. an evolutionary dead end.
i’ve said this once before in clearwind glide. caleb can do almost everything he puts his mind to: sailing a boat through stormy seas, ensuring survival in the middle of some island, paragliding them to their destination.
but one thing caleb particularly needs help with is flying freely, especially in the main timeline. this was the metaphor of mc taking his hand as they soared through the skies and guiding him to fly with the seagulls.
similarly in yys, caleb couldn’t break out of that cycle. mc chose to do that for him. once she regained her memories, she decided to accept the consequences. to bear the burden of saving all beings and balance yin and yang.
she is the one who broke caleb out of that cycle, when he couldn’t. even if it meant giving up the only thing she’d wanted in that cruel universe. to be with her brother, forever.
which leads me to the most beautiful part of yin yang sundering, for me. mc’s devotion to caleb.
a meimei’s love for her gege.
mc’s devotion to caleb was the most beautiful thing to me from yin yang sundering.
don’t get me wrong, caleb’s love and yearning for her was unspeakable, which we will get into later. but it’s something we see all the time. what it means to be gege, caleb shows us this time and time again in EVERY piece of content.
but we don’t often get to see what it means for mc. to be caleb’s meimei. his beloved baby sister.
we’ve not seen mc make these magnitude of sacrifices for caleb (maybe once in decoherence, but even then that was for herself as much as it was for X02). not because mc isn’t willing to, but because caleb NEVER gives her the chance to. because he wants her to want for nothing, sacrifice NOTHING for him.
to caleb, being a gege meant…dying for his sister (he says this in decoherence and shows it in both deco and yys). taking her everywhere she wanted to go. the one who’d be the first to hold her hand, always.
to mc, being caleb’s meimei meant loving him more than anyone else in the world. to protect her brother, stay with him, and do everything for him.
including giving him up, if it meant breaking him free from that cycle.
she’s even willing to give up her memories of him, because it’s what he wanted—his last wish. maybe she knew the oblivion dewdrops would not work on her, but the way her hand shook when she took the cup from caleb made me sob.
she would do everything for him. that’s what being a mei mei means to her.
this might be the most beautiful thing about yys. we literally get to see ourselves what it means for these two to be gege and meimei. how precious and pure their bond is.
and seeing it in yys, we can better understand how they carry this same meaning into every single relationship they build, in every universe.
it’s been going around that the old spiritmaster that constantly approaches mc, is none other than mc herself.
mc’s devotion to caleb is endless. so much so, she returned as herself—as the old spiritmaster. to implore, to BEG, mc to save the world. to not let caleb’s death be in vain. to not let her brother’s death be meaningless, even after centuries
the appearance (braids, the intricate bone mask that caleb likely carved), the intimate knowledge about caleb and his stories, unafraid of mc and knowing what she was at first glance. she even says that the old spiritmaster is the only one who remembers the great spiritmaster (caleb).
i’m not sure how it happened, i can maybe assume that when caleb left mc the first time and became the netherlord and mc followed him, she killed herself because she knew she’d need to be a ghost to get to him.
maybe when that happened, part of her soul split and latched onto a human form, or was reborn as a human. the old spiritmaster. as we know, mc is the one who represents the nether realm, yin energy. and yin energy is responsible for rebirth (which is why mc constantly reincarnates in the main story)
or maybe, it’s another version of their story. im not sure. but the old spiritmaster is mc, and the dragonfly that follows her around is caleb. they represent the sacrifice that caleb gave to spare mc the fate the heavens decreed—in which caleb dies in order to become the netherlord.
maybe he somehow reincarnates as the dragonfly, and mc the spiritmaster. even in that twisted version of events, caleb really stays by her side, just as he always promised.
but when i put this together…it broke my heart. that for year/centuries, this old spiritmaster has been tracking mc, trying to guide her to do the right thing. and when caleb dies yet AGAIN, is when the spiritmaster pleads with mc to fulfill her duty and save the mortal realm. to break the cycle and save their brother.
but i also want to point out, caleb and mc never did this for anyone other than themselves. they were selfish until the end, selfless for one another and one another ONLY.
caleb sacrificing himself, going from spiritmaster to netherlord, was NEVER about saving humans, saving the mortal realm.
in fact, caleb seems to HATE humans, having a lot of disdain for them and very little sympathy. why wouldn’t he? the fate and balance of the entire world was placed on him and his beloved sister. the heavens demanded her life.
and caleb refused to give it.
so when he forced the nether realm into creation, he did it because he wanted mc to be able to stay in the mortal realm. he wanted to create “the world they wanted to see.” it’s just, he’d never be able to see it with her. which is why he took the role, creating the nether realm, in hopes of keeping ghosts away from his sister and her world.
and similarly, mc. the only reason she chose to break the cycle, to finally assume her rightful position and balance yin and yang, was because she could no longer bear to see caleb in pain. to see him doomed to die, over and over.
she didn’t want to be without him, that was the one thing she feared more than anything. but she could live with that, if it meant he existed. and he could exist, free from that cycle of agony and anguish.
that brings me to the third thing i found to be MOST impactful from yys: rain & yearning.
this was the most incredible, tragic, and beautiful culmination this myth could have led to.
“every soul that reincarnates will carry my yearning for you.”
“they say that if you miss someone, rain shall fall wherever that person is. […] i can’t imagine how strong that yearning must be if rain can fall here.”
like holy shit, chills.
obviously this gives new meaning to rain’s embrace, to farspace bloomfall, and new insights into what exactly is feeling in those moments.
but i also wonder…if this is netherlord/lord of the mortal realm caleb’s tears reaching even the depths of different timelines and universes. if his tears can reach the nether realm, perhaps they reach present day linkon, too. after all, this is the depth of his yearning for her. if his yearning for her is so great that it could replenish the river of oblivion and allow them to see each other once more.
after all, it seemed their bond was enough to let BOTH of them remember one another. again, maybe the oblivion dewdrops simply do not work on mc, and maybe caleb simply can NEVER forget her (ties into his who toring chip/amnesia thing, and how he’s always the one who remembers for mc: deco, clearday return)
as for the river of oblivion…more below. but specifically it as an analogy to calebmc as a whole. every single instance of calebmc we see traces back to yin yang sundering.
many have mentioned already that yinyang sundering feels like the focal point at which calebmc’s story began to splinter and spiderweb out.
it’s a lot like the river of oblivion that connects all rivers of the mortal realm to the nether realm. but i also imagine this splintering into all calebmc aus we’ve seen, many of which have a poignant mention of water, a river or a body of water
and if you traced all these back to the source, to the netherfalls, you’d find the birthplace of the twin lotuses. the ones that had to sacrifice the chance to be together to create a prosperous world. a prosperous web of universes, where they have the chance to rewrite their story—and maybe, finally, be together
or mc can maybe cross over, and see caleb again
i was also pleasantly surprised to see them once again use physical intimacy in such a meaningful way for calebmc.
similarly to imperial thronesong (where calebmc use physical intimacy and sex to convey important emotions to one another that they both cannot verbalize, because they do not trust one another), yys has calebmc using “cultivation” as a means of healing.
yin yang sundering…was everything.
it showed us their shared origin—their intricate ties to one another. it showed us the depth of their bond, the true meaning of what it means to be gege & meimei. something that exists ONLY to them.
it was so unbelievably pure and tragically beautiful.
yin yang sundering, there is absolutely no doubt about where these two come from. what they are to each other. the endless cycle they endure—yin and yang.
as for the future….i am very curious where they will continue to go with the sun/light theme, because they made that very relevant in yys, and it would be a wonderful juxtaposition to the theme of yys.
caleb’s “evol” (his powers) immediately appear in the story as a golden light, and when they complete the ritual at the end, to finally separate yin and yang, the light that caleb is bathed in is akin to the sun coming out after endless days of rain.
That's so messed up, why on earth would tumblr give you so many content labels?!?
This app has been going insane since the passed couple months 🙁
This was my favourite place to interact with writers and artists, but tumblr keeps ruining things 😭💔
-🌨️
tumblr, and some users on here did mention that the labels are user generated, so its more than likely that someone or some people are reporting my account/posts :’)
it is what it is i fear
love you and you always make me smileeeee. i hope tumblr gets it together…
HI GUYSSS im not on here as often (i used to cross post a lot more when banners would drop) because tumblr content/mature-labeled my account so i just feel kinda iffy on here. if i ever write, i will still post on here (and not just on ao3), even if i’m just screaming into the void. at least until i decide otherwise, i have been wanting to be done w tumblr for good just bc of all the weird experiences on here
i dont write much anymore anyways so. i know i did have that 7k fic i was teasing, it will come eventually i ended up stopping writing altogether bc of everything w tumblr and some other things on ao3. being a writer is rough, please appreciate and send love to your fav authors.
if you ever do want to hear my senseless caleb yaps, im actively on twitter (xyzfy26)
for caleb’s third myth ill defo post my usual lore yaps here too. but im just not as active here anymore, so if i take a while to respond to an ask im sorry and i truly love u <3
this isnt a good bye or anything im just disclaiming ive taken a few steps away from tumblr!!
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HI GUYSSS im not on here as often (i used to cross post a lot more when banners would drop) because tumblr content/mature-labeled my account so i just feel kinda iffy on here. if i ever write, i will still post on here (and not just on ao3), even if i’m just screaming into the void. at least until i decide otherwise, i have been wanting to be done w tumblr for good just bc of all the weird experiences on here
i dont write much anymore anyways so. i know i did have that 7k fic i was teasing, it will come eventually i ended up stopping writing altogether bc of everything w tumblr and some other things on ao3. being a writer is rough, please appreciate and send love to your fav authors.
if you ever do want to hear my senseless caleb yaps, im actively on twitter (xyzfy26)
for caleb’s third myth ill defo post my usual lore yaps here too. but im just not as active here anymore, so if i take a while to respond to an ask im sorry and i truly love u <3
this isnt a good bye or anything im just disclaiming ive taken a few steps away from tumblr!!
ITS REAL HES HERE HE IS COMING HOME FINALLY!!!!!!!!!!!! OK but real talk it looks so good I can already see ppl saying it's a Xavier 3rd myth copy but it is so different and I'm really excited to read the full story. The baby sister bomb also gagged me low key, i feel weird that I find it attractive whenever he calls mc that but he just sounds so good and the taboo is unfortunately tabooing lmao. Also the aesthetics are fire sooooo happy we're not doomed to the techy vibe forever! && the way the "death" occurs i think is fairly satisfying for me I was team mc dies and caleb can't kill himself (bc we know man would if she was gone) but from what I understand of the trailer they mixed it up enough to have a "death" happen and still be interesting.
IT WAS SO FUKCIGNRDKJGDFKJGLDFGNDLFGL
i didnt see that about xav myth but im muting everything negative on sight HAHAHA
the thing about when caleb says baby sister is it’s very possessive. its very much like putting emphasis on the role they hold to each other. he doesn’t just say 她 (her/she) he always says 我的妹妹 (my baby sister). it’s VERY possessive and its very much highlighting their close bond
at first i thought obv caleb is the king/lord of the underworld and mc is already dead, so he’s trying to revive her and ultimately that would mean they cannot be together
but at the end…he walks into the light and her into the darkness
and i very much agree caleb cant kill himself. he’s had so many instances where he almost died, but he somehow survives (explosion, toring testing, deepspace tunnel). this is why the underworld fits SO MUCH
I've been bamboozled... there was no myth release tonight... i might burn down infold i am so upset but as long as he is still going before sylus's bday it will happen this next week because the event MUST start on or before 3/30 I'm just stressed rn man I was so hopeful for tonight..
HELLO LMAOOOO U AND ME BOTH I really thought last night was the night
im praying just...before April in NA :////
and yes very much agree about the futuristic stuff! no more mechanical plssss. tbh I did think the leak was real until it was debunked tbh it would eat
but anything they cook up for him (even if it is mech) will eat. I have zero expectations and know itll be GOOD
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