the doormat

NOAH: oh, really? what's up?

NOAH: are you serious? have you told them that would kind of make your personal life a mess?

NOAH: so you are back with payton?

stan: i tried, and i told them that i'm not comfortable with this but they don't listen, you know how managements are

NOAH: Hey

NOAH: i feel like i never talk to you anymore which is weird for me because we used to talk all the time and i know we've both been busy or well, you have working on that movie but i still think we should catch up or something

NOAH: i mean, how've you been?

stan: hey

stan: i was meaning to message you actually, gotta tell you something that's happening.

stan: hannah and i are together .

pj: i'll have you :p

pj: also how do you not want to kiss hannah?

pj: i do all the time

pj: the friendship / girl crush is real

stan: then seems like you and i have a date tonight beautiful.

stan: well she's your girl crush

stan: unfortunately she's not my kind of girl

hannah: black and red?

hannah: who arranged this? we're going to look like we're ready to dance the paso doble

stan: lol idk - i can't rock a red suit i'm not spiderman

stan: idk but i'm on my way see you soon

hannah: what are you wearing tonight? did they coincidentally get us to match? i'm in red

stan: black suit, red tie.

pj: i have a feeling they will make you do more than that

pj: management is brutal, i know from harry's experience

pj: they need it to be believable

pj: thank you, hannah also texted me to let me know

pj: you're always welcome in my home

stan: god i hope not, i like her and all but i don't really want to kiss her or anything i'd rather spend my time with you

pj: spill the beans

pj: what's up?

stan: management pulled a dirty one on me and hannah - basically we have to show up at an event together and hold hands and shit

stan: was gonna say no but then they told me that hannah had said yes (to which she actually said no) and we both got stuck doing this

stan: i just wanted you to hear it from me and not from some random tabloid

hannah: good to know

hannah: i just messaged payton so she's aware that there's no funny business going on

stan: you can't avoid the topic forever.

hannah: are you suggesting that my plans won't work :(

hannah: well sometimes it's difficult to tell if that's a case of 'i want to be with her,' or like, 'i just don't want her to be with anyone else'

stan: i love her, i want to be with her.

stan: is there anyone that you'd be telling?

hannah: i'm serious!

hannah: wait what if we just pretend to act so wildly horrendously incompatible tonight that they no longer want us to do this

hannah: ... do you want to be with her?

stan: so was i!

stan: hannah, we barely talk on set, and when we do, we are fighting about something - we're as incompatible as they get

hannah: urgh

hannah: see you at 8. no funny business.

hannah: are you guy's getting back together ???

stan: no funny business lol

hannah: you're such an idiot

hannah: you agreed to this and now i look like the disagreeable one.

hannah: you wouldn't be in this convo if you hadn't said yes in the first place ??? your manager gives me the creeps

hannah: why don't we just get there at different times. there's nothing they can do about it.

hannah:

hannah: my manager just called. ok. guess i am a fucking puppet.

stan: i agreed to it because they said you agreed to it!

stan: hannah i don't want to do this, i am finally getting back on payton's good side and i don't want anything to hurt it and this is totally not going to help but i have to

hannah: is that what they told you???

hannah: that's not what they told me

hannah: they hinted that this is going to have to carry on until we wrap filming and release. they want us to keep this up until press week.

hannah: aka, for months. it's not simple. they start with the stupid drive in and drive off, then it's going to be dates and hand holding and ew.

stan: i wasn't told about dates. uh.. i don't know...

stan: look. i don't want to do this, but let's just get through this one night and then sit down with our managers and talk to them about this whole thing.

stan: the only pda that will be shared is a hand on your back and a kiss on the cheek for the damn camera but let's just get this over with cause i'm getting really weird texts from my manager.

stan has sent a photo.

stan: hey beautiful

hannah: your job is on the line. big whoop. so is mine, i told them no. we aren't hollywood puppets

hannah: uhm, have you told p?

hannah: i would say no to a stunt with anyone. it's not really limited to you. i don't need a PR relationship

hannah: no.

stan: not yet, i'm about to tell her

stan: lol i really don't think you get to chose hannah

stan: all we have to do is walk into the movie together and out together, no need to even sit beside each other.