i'm the bad guy, duh

Even if it was over the top Oliver was absorbing every second of it. He loved seeing Addi interacting with her family. It made him feel so honored that he was the one who got to enjoy this with her. It made him feel so full of warmth to know how proud of him she was. She brought him all the way to France to spend time in her families lavish home, it wasn’t lost on him how special this was. If not a little uncomfortable as they lived completely in a different way than he was ever used to. Ollie caught Addi’s blush and waited for her to interpret with a big smile,  it was a ritual he was growing accustomed too. “I for one believe carbs are one of the best ways to express love.”

Oliver felt like there was a rock in his stomach as he stared at his girlfriend. Maybe, he should have tried to beat Alex to looking at the phone but his mind was far more focused on Addison, trying to read her expression. He didn’t like the feeling of not know what was going on. What could make her have this blank stare on her face. He squeezed her thigh tight focusing on Addi and not Sebastian’s insistent tone. A panic washed over Ollie’s face when Alex said for her not to answer it. There’s only one person that it could be.

Fuck.

When Addi confirmed it was indeed Carter, Oliver felt sick to his stomach. He couldn’t tell if it was rage, sadness, confusion, or concern. Most likely, it was a combination of all the above which left him speechless. As, Sebastian reached for the phone Oliver was almost relieved. Perhaps, it would be best for him to handle? God only knows what Addison’s father was going to say. And on her birthday of all days. Ollie had feared she was going to look to him for answers and when he saw her eyes meet his, that fear was confirmed. He had no idea what to say. And in front of her whole family. Alex and Sebastian where staring at him looking like they were ready to pounce any second if he said the wrong thing. Oliver didn’t typically feel small but in this moment he swore his was 2 feet tall. “I…uhhh,” he started, but gulped. Oliver knew the struggle between the little kid part of Addi that wanted to speak to her dad and the hurt adult who never wanted anything to do with him again. He sighed and squeezed her thigh again. “I would…if I were you I’d want to speak with him,” he answered slowly and softly not even daring to look at Alex for fear him may kill him. But in this moment he cared more about being honest with Addison than her brother or father being pissed at him.

“And that’s why I date you,” she said with a smirk, planting a soft kiss on his cheek. Her family wasn’t the type to balk at PDA, especially when they were letting Oliver stay in Addi’s room. They had a very European view on sex and alcohol - as long as you’re an adult and being safe, it’s a part of life. 

Addison felt so lost. Typically, she was the one to take control in a crisis. She could make the hard decisions in an instant. She never tended to rely on other people for helping her along the way. But this. This was something that had her shocked directly into some sort of brain freeze. Like her neurons were trains that had suddenly come upon a fallen tree along the tracks. She knew that it was too much to ask of him to help with this decision. She knew it was something they’d have to discuss later and that she shouldn’t be doing it. But he was the only person she could trust in this situation. 

Alex and Sebastian both started talking the minute Oliver replied. Trying to drown out Addison’s thought process with protests against the idea of anyone but the two of them talking with Carter. Addison just looked at Ollie, though, so relieved that he was saying the very thing that was bubbling up in her chest. He understood. “Thank you,” she whispered before letting her eyes turn to her family. She already felt like she was going to cry. “I know that you all don’t get it. I know that you want to curse him out or want me to block his number. And I understand. I do. I am so angry at him. I hate him.” She looked to the screen that she knew was about to go to Voicemail. “But I also love him and I want to see what he wants.” 

Addison’s words made Ollie’s heart skip a beat. He wanted her family to accept him, yes. But at the end of the day all that mattered was how Addi felt about him. And not even for a second did he feel anything but love and admiration which he hoped he reciprocated. “Maybe they will one day. Until then it can just be us for a bit,” he said and gave her hand a gentle squeeze. “I think your grandmother is close. She is the most open to me at least.” As much as Oliver wanted Sebastian to accept him, at this point he was happy with any progress.

Oliver gave her wide as at her admission that she’d give him kisses even without any gifts. Addi was very sweet to him but the moments she was only sweet without a witty comment to follow were rare. “Oh is that so? Good thing I’ll always return those kisses too.” He gave her a gentle smile seeing her put on more clothing to head down to her family. He was happy though to soak in the remaining moments they had just the two of them before going to see everyone else. Ollie mimicked her laugh happy to listen to Addi ramble about food. “It all sounds delicious. I wish we could pack your grandma up and bring her back to New York with us.”

As they made their way down Oliver’s nose was met with the most wonderful smells. He was prepared to drop Addi’s hand as she made the rounds of good mornings and happy birthday wishes. But he felt her hold tight to his, so instead he just smiled politely at everyone. Once seated Ollie looked at all the food in front of them and glanced at Addison. “This is what a birthday breakfast looks like in the Smythe household?” he teased. 

Oliver wasn’t paying too much attention when he heard Addi’s phone vibrate. It must be a friend. He continued to pour himself some coffee. It wasn’t until he caught a glimpse of a curious look on Cami’s face did he look back at Addison. He put his hand on her thigh, and looked at her concerned not knowing that she possible could have received that would cause the look on her face. “Adds?” he whispered. 

“Don’t say maybe,” Addi said, giving him a nudge. “They will. I’ll make them. But, yes, you and I are enough for now. We always are.” And that was true, even if they had no one else in the world, she knew that she had him. Whether or not her family accepted it. She had to smile, though, when he brought up her grandma. He had a point there. Sebastian’s mother had definitely taken a liking to him. He definitely had some French country boy energy about him that the Smythe matron was drawn to. Addi also thought that her Grand-mère liked how sweet and gentle Ollie was as a partner. How respectful and fond he was, too. She often worried about Addi, after everything, and anyone who made her granddaughter smile like that was worthy of consideration in her book. “You’ve got that vibe that makes old women swoon, I guess,” she teased.

“She should definitely come out and visit soon at the very least, though I would never say no to her becoming a live in-cook. I don’t know that she’d find New York apartments up to her standard of living, though.” The home they were in now was proof enough of that. Addi almost felt awkward bringing Ollie here. It made her feel like maybe he’d think she was some kind of rich brat to grow up around this kind of fine living. Especially when that wasn’t at all how she wanted to live her life. Money was great and she would always feel so lucky to have it, but the status that comes with it was of no interest to her.

“Hey, no teasing, it’s my birthday,” she chided, already taking a sip of her hot chocolate. “They always go a little over the top,” she added, smiling warmly at her grandmother who shot back in pretty French that any grandbaby of hers would always get the best in celebration of another year on Earth. It made Addi blush and laugh before she leaned to interpret it for Ollie. “She’s always a bit too much, but in another way this just feels like comfort and home. Showing their love through way too many carbs.” 

Everyone else in the room was starting to clue in by then to the distraught look on Addison’s face. “What is it?” Sebastian said, already rising and trying to look over. Her grandparents remained more poised but looked over to their son. Alex, seated to Addi’s other side leaned over and caught the name on the screen. “Addison, do not,” he stressed, leaning over to grab the phone from her. This broke Addison from her dissociated stare at the screen, clutching the phone closer to her and out of his reach. “What is it?” Sebastian repeated, his tone more sharp as he looked at his son. “Who is it?” 

Oliver quietly watched as Addi run a hand through her hair. His eyes carefully watching her red locks, a gentle smile appearing on his lips when he thought more about his own statement. “I have to balance out my creepy with sweet,” he whispered his hand coming up to her cheek to stoke it softly. “I’m really glad you get along with my family so well.” Ollie knew that wasn’t the first (nor would it be the last time) that statement had come out of his mouth but it was something he valued so much about their relationship. It wasn’t something he had experienced before. It made his heart ache, thinking about the Smythe’s and how they were still warming up to him. He tried focusing on how Addi kept reassuring him they did in fact like him, even if their actions didn’t necessarily show it. 

“I know but it feels more special to be able to make you smile like this on your birthday,” he admitted. It was really all he had been hoping for. He easily leaned into her touch happily soaking in any affection she wanted to give him, even though today it should be the other way around. “Never ever. Totally your fault. My ego was completely in check and now we have to deal with this,” he laughed into the soft skin of her neck. “You do get to ask for whatever you want as the birthday girl. Just don’t abuse your power,” he teased pulling back enough to see her face. Oliver let out a big sigh at her words. Addi was right. But he didn’t really want to get out of bed. “The promise of food is the only thing that makes that sound super appealing.”

Addison chuckled at his little joke, turning her cheek into his hand. The way he could add the littlest touches into their conversations never failed to make butterflies start to take off in her stomach. “I think that speaks more about your family than it does me. They’re so sweet and so welcoming. It’s easy to love them, so the rest just came naturally,” she pointed out. Really, she just wanted to impress upon Oliver that the ‘issues’ that he was having connecting with her family wasn’t at all on him. They were prickly. They did like him; they just weren’t that great at showing it. “I really feel like we’re already a part of each other’s families. And that’s wonderful. Especially to have on my birthday.” 

Ollie could help but laugh at her words. “Hey, you also get non-stalker-y photoshoots. I at least balance it out,” he countered bumping his nose playfully against her. “You know you also get Broadway tickets from Blaine. I don’t even have to be your date, I’m sure dad will gladly take you by himself one of these days.” It was really sweet to Oliver how much his dad not only ‘approved’ of Addison but also genuinely liked her. Family was so important to both of them that it made him thrilled to be with someone who he not only loved but his family did too.

“You should be so proud,” he teased, nuzzling his face into her neck. “Seeing your smile made it all worth it,” he whispered because that really was his goal. He’d do anything in his power to make Addi smile like that always. He gave her a smug smirk when she said it was annoying how pretty and wonderful he was. “Maybe you shouldn’t have gone around calling me gorgeous all the time and convincing me I actually am. You created this monster.” Addi didn’t even have to confirm that she was challenging him, he knew from the tone of her voice. “Hmm, is that so?” he asked leaning to gently kiss her bottom lip. “And are you going to be mean, and make me figure out on my own how to make it even better? Or will you give me a hint?" 

“True, I guess it’s all in the balance,” she said with a smirk. She ran a hand through her hair, smiling gently, when he pointed out that Blaine would probably take her to see theatre without Ollie in tow. It was true. It made her so, so happy that Blaine seemed to like her so much. It made her feel like she really had a place in the Anderson family. Like she was more to them than some girl Oliver was dating. She was someone they were happy to see and wanted around. In some ways, it made her feel a little badly for Ollie. She could tell that her family liked Oliver. He wouldn’t be on this trip if they didn’t. But the Smythe’s were never warm and fuzzy like the Anderson’s were. They’re kind of aloof approval was a very good sign, but she knew that that might be hard for Ollie to understand. 

Oliver couldn’t help but roll his eyes at her teasing, but he wasn’t able to keep a straight face long when he felt her kiss his cheek. It wasn’t lost on him when she said for life. They had mentioned long term things before, but it still always made him feel warm inside. He wanted that to be his life, their life together.  “I didn’t know a perk of dating you meant Paris trips for life. Even more of a reason I’m not going to be able to let you go,” he teased. Often, they would joke about how privileged Addi’s family was and although Oliver loved the apartment and trips, they really only meant anything to him because it was more time he was able to spend with her. “Just us does sound amazing. I do enjoy spending time with your family, especially your grandmother, even if they are kind of scary.” Ollie did enjoy when Addi would interrpurt for him. One because it was hot and two it was still so impressive to him. “It would be pretty shitty of you.”

He took a deep breath, happy she liked his gift. “Dad or Nellie didn’t even help me. This was all me,” he smiled wide, his hand cupping her cheek, more than content to just stay closer to her for a moment. “It’s mostly your fault,” he retorted with a gentle chuckle, as he rested his forehead against hers. “You’ve ruined me for life, telling me how great and pretty I am.” He stole another kiss after her words. “Feels like that’s a challenge,” he teased. 

“And from you I get...free stalker-y photoshoots for life,” she teased right back, knowing he’d know it was all in jest. She didn’t want anything out of this relationship except for him by her side. But that wasn’t going to stop her from being playful. Nothing could. And, in another sense, she liked being the one who could pull out all the stops and fly him to another country, taking him into nice places and feeding him good food. She never had someone who she wanted to do that sort of stuff for. No one who she felt would enjoy it for the moment and for her company - not just because she was a free ticket to some kind of adventure. Ollie’s insistence that he did like spending time with her family was clear evidence of that. The ex she rarely wanted to speak about had been the opposite, never wanting to be around the Smythe’s. Addi could understand that. They were a lot. But the fact that Ollie did want to, despite the fact they could be “kind of scary” told her that he cared. Cared enough to try. And that meant the world. 

Addison didn’t need to reassure him that they were going to have tons of fun. Oliver already knew that. But he also wasn’t about to complain about spending time with her all over Paris. “Hmm, I can’t wait. You’re going to show me the best spots, right? It doesn’t feel real being here, you know.” He was still having a hard time wrapping his head around it. Trips to France with your girlfriend felt like this you only ever watched in romcoms. But the fact that they were there together, even with Addi’s family, seemed too good to be true. “Mhmmm maybe you have a point. I am irresistible,” he laughed. “But see you have the upper hand. You don’t have to translate for me. And I would be blissfully unware. Just like when Alex says snarky things about me,” he chuckled slightly. Oliver liked to believe he was start to make some progress with her brother, even if it was only a slight.

“Yep, Adds I got you a box,” he teased right back, his hand resting on her thigh as she began to open the gift. Oliver watched her face closely, wanting to take in exactly how she felt about it. When she whispered his name, he felt like his heart was going to explode. He knew he had done good. “Yeah?” he asked, his thumb rubbing circles on her leg. “I felt like it was us, you know? Like I could have gotten you jewelry or something but this felt right,” he explained, matching her soft tone. “Well, I am the sweetest boyfriend ever. But I’m glad you like it.” He let himself be swept up into another kiss. His hand finding it’s way up to the side of her neck. He grinned at every one of her ‘I love yous.’ “You sure? I’m not so sure you do,” he teased, pulling her in for another kiss. 

“No, I think I’ll show you the worst spots actually,” she teased, leaning in to kiss his cheek. “Feeling really lucky you dated a half-French girl, huh? Trips to Paris for life?” She teased, but the thought of taking Ollie here for vacations and holidays and having, if things went how her heart ached for them to go, family trips with their kids someday made Addi giddy with excitement. “And, you know, sometime we’ll be able to go when it’ll just be us. No lurking grandparents or annoying siblings.” She shook her head when he said that she didn’t need to translate. “Please, it’s more fun when I need to expose people. But, like, seriously. I’m always gonna translate everything. It would be really fucking shitty for me to just let you be confused all the time - hot French people aside.” 

Oliver grinned when he felt Addison’s hand tangled in his hair and repeat his words. His goal for today was to make her feel as special as possible. Whatever, he had to do to make that happen he was more than willing. “Mhmm, anything you want, love,” he promised. “When we go out on the town, huh?” he teased, but couldn’t help but smile. It wasn’t that Addi him hadn’t gone out, obviously they had, but being with her in Paris felt like a whole new level of adventure and excitement. “Maybe that’ll maybe me more nervous though. Worried about all those hot French people hitting on you,” he chuckled.

“Now.” Oliver said not missing a beat in their conversation as he pulled out a small box from his bag. Inside, was another smaller wooden memory box, filled with different items from the past year of their relationship: pictures, ticket stubs, some notes he had written to her, anything he had collected over the past year that was tangible and related to them.  Oliver knew it was cheesy but he like the idea that this gift was meaningful to both of them. “I don’t want to have to share how wonderful my gift is with everyone else. Plus, it’ll make them jealous at how good I did,” he teased sitting back down on the bed facing Addi, eagerly handing her over the box. 

“Yes, exactly. You think I was limiting us to just that? We’re gonna have tons more fun,” she replied. “I have to show you all of Paris.” Addison wished that they’d had the whole summer. Just them in a tiny apartment near the heart of the city. They could spend as many lazy days in as they spent exploring. She was, of course, more than happy with the time they had, but a girl could dream. “Pssh, no. If any hot French people hit on anyone it’s going to be you. And I’m gonna have to interpret the flirtation and that will just be embarrassing for me,” she joked back.

When Addi allowed herself to be pulled in closer, Oliver took the opportunity to snuggle in even more next to her. Gladly, he returned her kiss making sure to kiss her in a way he knew she’d like. “Thank god,” he mumbled against her lips when she promised they didn’t need to get up. He met her eyes for a moment, happy to take in how beautiful she looked in the morning sun.

“Well, you are the birthday girl. So, you do get whatever you want today,” he played, moving his hair out of his face. Ollie rolled his eyes playfully when Addison mentioned all the people waiting for them downstairs. He wasn’t used to such a big family and even though he teased he found he was enjoying spending time with them. Even if they terrified him, slightly. “Don’t remind me,” he whined playfully. “I think my French might be getting worse,” he teased, rolling Addison onto her back. Straddling her as he leaned into another kiss, his hands caressed her sides. “You’ve got that right, though. I am the best company.” He kissed her again before sitting up on his knees. “You can make it up to me by opening my gift now,” he said wearing a proud grin as he got off the bed and towards his backpack.

Addison laughed at his little mumble, holding him a little tighter. God, he was so adorable. He stopped to look at her and she couldn’t help but reach up into his hair like she constantly tried to do. There was something so soothing about feeling his curls slide through her fingers. “Exactly. Anything that I say goes!” she teased, dropping her hand back to the bed.

Being with Addison and her family in France had felt completely surreal. Oliver never could have dreamed up such a perfect trip. Not only were they getting to spend the most incredible summer together, but they were also getting to split their time between two amazing cities and with each other’s families. Lately, their relationship had felt real. Or more so than it had before. They had become so intertwined that this really seemed to be a long-haul situation and Oliver loved every second of it. 

“Hmm,” he mumbled feeling her hand on his shoulder nudging him awake. Currently, he laid curled up on his side, his face smooshed into his pillow, curls a mess, not wanting to get up. He smiled eyes still closed when Addi mentioned what day it was. Of course, he knew it was her birthday. And he thought it was beyond adorable that she was excited to spend the day with him and wanted him awake. 

He laughed as he felt Addi’s face so close to his before opening his eyes to find her right next to him. “Hi,” he chuckled, his hand reaching for the small of her back to pull her in closer. “Happy birthday, love,” he whispered, his lips brushing against hers. “Are we required to get up, up soon? Or can we stay like this for a little bit?” he asked, his fingers tracing up and down her back contently. 

Addison gladly let herself get pulled closer to him, curling into his side. She gave him a proper kiss at his whispered words. “Thank you, baby.” She let her lips press against his a few more times before speaking again to answer his questions. Today she just wanted to take her time in everything. Especially the little things that concerned him. She wanted to feel every ounce of the luckiness she knew she had. 

She couldn’t think of a better way to spend any day, much less this one. 

She stayed like that for a few moments before gently reaching out to touch his shoulder. She didn’t want to jump scare him awake, but the thought of wasting more daylight without him, even if they stayed in bed, seemed impossible. “Hey sleepyhead...” she whispered. “Guess what daaay it is?” She placed her face close to his. “Wake uuuuup.” 

“Isn’t it kind of a bad thing, though?” he challenged, his skin feeling warm where her lips had been. Oliver knew Addison had a point that it wasn’t such a bad thing that he cared so much. “I guess I’d rather care too much than not enough.” It was one of the incredible things Blaine had instilled in him.   At Addi’s admission, made him give her a small smile because she was being so sweet to him. “I wish you could too,” he admitted. “But being here and loving me makes it better,” he promised. It wasn’t shocking that she agreed it might be best for him to see someone professionally about all of this. “Yeah,” he said quietly. “I just want to be my best, you know? For you and my family and me, obviously. And I don’t want this to become a thing between us. I want to be able to share this with you, and everything, without totally breaking down. But I can’t do that right now,” he told her, trying to be as honest as possible even if it made him uncomfortable to say out loud.  Oliver allowed Addi to pull him to his feet, he wasn’t done letting her baby him just yet. “Hmmm. That’s all I want. To be so snuggled up with you.” He followed her to her bedroom, his free hand wiping away the tears that had formed during their conversation. “Sorry for crying." 

“Hmm, they needed to go,” he agreed about his pants. His heart raced when he felt her muscles tighten around his finger. Her words made him grin giving him a huge ego boost. “No? Good. I wanna make you feel so good,” he whispered against her. Addi’s moans had his head spinning and he had to remind himself to continue to move his finger and mouth against her. He breathed heavily against her as he listened to her words. He chuckled gently, hearing her having a hard time forming her sentences. “Fuck,” he whined when she explained what she was going to do to him. He sucked on her. “You give the best blow jobs,” he praised pushing himself up enough to replace his mouth with his hand. He rubbed her, as he leaned to place a kiss on her inner thigh.

Oliver leaned more into Addison’s touch when she rubbed his back, letting himself soak up any attention she was willing to give him right now. “It’s a blessing and cruse caring so much,” he mumbled sarcastically doing his best to return her smile. Again, he knew her words were right but that didn’t make them an easier to believe. He knew how he felt was probably normal, and it shouldn’t upset him so much, but realistically he wished he just didn’t have to deal with it. “It super sucks. But I know you’re right.” Her kiss made him feel more loved and comforted than anything else. He rubbed his thumb against Addison’s waist in thought. “Do you think….like…maybe I should talk to someone?” he whispered. He knew therapy wasn’t bad obviously he just never thought he should go. He never thought his problems warranted it. He shook his hand at her question, and locked their fingers. “No, I’m okay.” He rubbed the back of her hand before adding, “Can we go lie down, though?” 

As bad as he felt, he felt even worse for not being able to hide how upset he was. Oliver never felt embarrassed for crying, and he knew he could get emotional, but with Addi, he also knew it was hurting her to see him like this because he felt the same when she was upset. He took a deep breath, trying to calm himself, and nodded, hearing her words. “Logically, I know that But it’s hard to remember it’s not my fault sometimes,” he finally whispered. “I hate how much control he has over me. And I hate that I’d like to talk to him one day,” he admitted, holding her gaze. He didn’t like to acknowledge that. For most of his life, Ollie had tried to ignore the fact that Eric even existed. Part of him wondered if he had ever tried to reach out to him and Nellie and if Blaine didn’t allow it, to protect them. He knew she was trying to comfort him with her words and smile and truthfully they helped. He buried his head into her chest, letting Addi hold him and make him feel cared for. “I wanna be a good dad someday. I don’t want to ever hurt anyone like he’s done.” When he heard she loved him and leaned further into her, wrapping his arms tight around her waist. “I love you, too. And you are the best," he said, placing a kiss on her chest, wanting her to know he wasn’t annoyed with her for bringing this up. Even if it made him uncomfortable and sad.