it says clearly in the lease no bee movie or else

if the fifteenth doctor said this

and the first doctor said this

Left in a pub while his sugar daddy (who is broke) goes off to meet a scientist and then doesn’t return for 3-5 business days

Makes new friends who won’t stop accusing him of being a spy

Loses a sword fight, in a fashion both homoerotic and embarrassing

Keeps telling everyone the Abbot is his broke sugar daddy, leading to worsening of Point 2, and in the end it was all for nothing anyway bc it turned out Steven is just faceblind and used to the Doctor lying to his face

Thinks he stumbles across the Doctor’s dead body lying in the street but

Is chased by an angry crowd before he can do anything about it

Truly believes for a whole night or so that he’s stranded in 1500s France and he doesn’t even have a key to the TARDIS

When the Doctor comes back he just, as usual, acts as if Steven is being stupid on purpose, and he scolds him for not just staying in the pub forever, like he’s a basset hound the Doctor left in his Peugeot 403

Spends half his time trying to keep this one very frightened girl alive and then the Doctor is like “oh yes we left her in the Massacre. it’s probably fine”

Fails to extricate himself from the cycle of abuse despite recognising he needs to leave the relationship (tells the Doctor to get fucked and leaves the TARDIS then comes straight back in bc Reasons, is immediately abducted again)

Becomes an accessory to kidnapping

The titular Massacre doesn’t happen to Steven but:

12a: If easily could have if the Doctor had been an hour late getting back, seeing as he left without knowing the Massacre was on the weather forecast