Lesbian of the Shoebox

i think it is good to warn people in advance about the circumstances that will cause you to bite them and i think that having given that warning it is good to follow through when the time comes

the rattlesnake is an admirable creature whose virtues we should emulate

One time at dance some rando grabbed me by the waist and told me to dance with him and I told him “if you don’t let go I’m going to bite you” and he didn’t let go so I bit him and that really should be the end of the story but he thought that was funny so I turned around and gave him a donkey kick to the shins and took about a 4 inch strip of skin with me so what I learned that day is when one is without debilitating venom, one must be as a horse do

“be as a horse do” is my new favorite colloquialism.

“Everyone has the same 24h” yeah right buddy say that to cavefish

almost all animals have set activity and rest patterns and this guy does whatever whenever

This is already happening – one of the softwares used by a museum I work at only lets you talk to a human help agent if you have their premium subscription. It's such bullshit

the fact you are not the only one in these notes saying "no this is already happening; i have to pay money to speak to a representative" is just... really awesome! you said a software used by museums is doing this shit? okay! great! wonderful!! anybody know where i can scream

i don’t know how incels can even exist… like bro stop calling them foids and get a scuba certification or get really into rock climbing. some woman somewhere will think yeah sure why not i’ll spare some pussy

almost every woman i know is always like “the hottest thing about him is that he has a passion and a hobby in the outdoors” i’m pretty sure a woman would fuck like a ratty 5’6” dude with temple recession and a beer gut if he was a snowboarder. matter of fact i’ve seen it 5 or 6 times. i’m pretty sure y’all are voluntarily involuntary celibates for the e-clout and e-community

Having an actual personality and actual things u like is more “valuable” than any other shit lmfao like come on everyone get ur ass up

literally and like not to say looks don’t matter at all they do physical attraction is a variable but a lot of people who think they’re not dating because they’re ugly are actually just not dating because they’re insecure and don’t set/follow through on goals, don’t develop any of their hobbies or interests over time, don’t try to work on their social game at all. like a good personality does so much that you can be a normal, average or even like a kinda funky looking person and still have a healthy, normal dating life