Your friendly neighbourhood absol

PSA: if you do [CRAFT IN BED] you will also receive [SCRAPS IN BED]. and if needles are involved you will also receive [NEEDLE LOST IN BED]. just wanted to make sure people knew this if they were planning on getting into the hobby

I love handing out amulets to all the junior evil mages and watching them act all corrupted. Staggering around going "ooough I can feel it changing me... what is this dark power?" Idk it's from temu so probably heavy metal poisoning man

i have [gestures vaguely] my tendencies

this makes me less sad every time I see it no matter how sad the rest of the world is making me

Yeah, I dont really have a gender anymore. What happened to it? I didn't use it enough and it atrophied and fell off. Yeah its really sad but I gave it a decent burial so its okay I guess

Better than what happened to one of my mates. Lost it to gangrene ay yeah terrible way to lose it

there are songs i hear and go “man there is no way anyone actually listens to this” and then you hear it on the radio 300 times a day and the album is nominated for a grammy and there are fans who spend every dollar they have on merch and concert tickets to sold out stadiums of people who all love that song. and you wonder if maybe you’re the one who’s wrong but then you hear it again and decide that nope, you’re right and everyone else has lost their minds

I think its pretty fucked up she's recording calls to a rape helpline tbh

‘bread is bad for you’ ‘rice is bad for you’ sorry im not subscribing to the idea that staple grains that have been integral to cultures for centuries are evil. i love you carbs

#lost in a fugue of penis delerium

reblog to spread your dick mania to everywhere you go