Hello fair readers! I decided to explain slightly the different colors for the chapters,
Red: is a standard chapter, with all the fun exposition
Pink: is a chapter that has softer more fluffy notes to their relationship
Purple: is a chapter with smut or 18+ activity, these will be completely optional for readers! They will have smaller plot points and can be skipped freely! (As of now we have none!)
Chapter One: The Deer
Chapter Two: One Mistake is All it Took To Meet Him
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IM ALIVE I SWEAR THE INSPIRATION HITS AT RANDOM TIMES SO IT REMAINS GOOD
It’s the dead of night, Y/N is snuggled up against Technoblade and he has his arm wrapped tightly around her.
He nuzzles the back of her head with his tusks softly. Such a gentle human curled up next to him almost makes his heart pound out of his chest.
Serene.
Yet when Y/N wakes up only 15 minutes later, she is alone in the bed. The cold of the room having stirred her from her own slumber.
Biting her lip she tries to make out any figure in the dark, even trying to locate anything to help see.
Smacking her hand down onto the nightstand by his bed she opens the drawer and fiddles around until she finds a flint and steel.
The click of it being so loud in the lonely room.
She wraps her blanket around herself and slips into her slippers. She notices his bathroom light isn’t on either.
Her head is racing and she opens the door to the cabin.
Nothing.
She continues her way downstairs, still nothing.
Swallowing the pit forming in her throat she shines her light towards the entrance. His shoes are missing…
She walks carefully to the door, opening it gently, peering outside there is still nothing. But the light of the lanterns outside let her put out her own light sliding it into her pocket.
Philzas lights are also out.
She walks into the freezing cold and starts looking around. She walks over the wooden deck and just as her slippers touch the snow she feels an eerie gaze on her.
Looking behind her proves fruitless.
What is going on?
They were doing so well. What happened?
Taking a few more steps being guided by the moons light she hears a thud to the ground.
Whipping around she sees Technoblade in his full attire huffing with one knee to the snow and the other supporting his hand.
“What are you doing out here Y/N?”
“I could say the same to you.” Her cheeks are flushed and she is visibly shaking from the cold.
He walks over to her and carefully pushes a piece of her hair behind her ear.
“I needed a moment to try.. to collect my thoughts”
“Your thoughts on what?” She pours softly but leans into his warm touch.
“I won’t do anything without your permission, I’ve done that enough. But I can’t drive you away.”
“You won’t drive me away, speak freely, before I freeze.”
His hand doesn’t leave her cheek but instead drifts down her face, their breath showing in the cold air between them.
“You must give me permission.”
Y/N nods, her heart racing a little faster as she looks up to him.
“You have to verbally tell me I may act and speak freely. Or I will carry you back inside.”
“I give you permission as long as there is no harm.” The nerves of the moment is itching beneath their skin, the cold becoming unnoticeable, besides the puffs after they speak.
He gently lifts her face, bending down to meet her height and places a soft kiss to her forehead. “Y/N… I cannot stop thinking of you.. I wanted to find a way to know you’d never leave.”
He takes a moment and looks into her eyes, “One outside of the arrangement to simply stay if I gave you control. I only reversed the ownership. I want to.. be one with you, I want to complete you. If you do not feel the same arrangements will be made. I just keep you safe.”
Y/N can’t move, she only has the function to let the thoughts process as he speaks.
“You are the warmth in my world, you have opened my heart I kept behind so many bars.” He drops to both knees slowly to allow her to look at him easier, he takes her hands into his own.
The look in his eyes as he gazes at her are lined with the stars from the sky, glossed over with his own emotions.
“You.. are what I needed to feel.. something worth keeping.”
Y/N brings her hands up from the hold he had on them to his face slowly, wiping the single tear that fell from his eyes. She gets closer before closing her eyes just inches before their lips touched.
Technoblade reached his hands to her hips, gripping onto her like a man needing salvation.
His grip to Y/N felt like the only way he would stay ground to the world.
He didn’t dare inch forward, closing his own eyes as he prayed to whatever God there was to hear his own wish.
Her. He only needed this one moment with her.
Please let this be the on thing he had truly earned.
After a delightful meal at Philzas, Y/N found herself feeling more and more comfortable around Technoblade.
The feeling was almost euphoric, it felt like a family, but it was different. She couldn’t shake this feeling that she wanted more from him.
Y/N didn’t even know if Techno wanted more from it. His actions said one thing but.. did he mean it?
It had been a while since the ‘new’ Technoblade started showing. The worst that could happen is… she shakes her head. He isn’t like that anymore.
But he could kick her out or send her back to the cabin.
As Technoblade started putting back on his boots over his hooves she stops.
“I’ll see you back at the cabin Techno, I just have to speak to Philza.”
Technoblades eyes narrowed, not forgetting how Philza said he would take her off his hands. “Don’t be too long.”
With a wave he exited through the connecting doors onto the walk way.
Technoblade waited by the door, before realizing he had to make it seem like he left, walked to his cabin, closed and opened the door. And so quietly made his way back to Philzas, his ear pressed to it quietly.
Philza chirped softly, his wings fluttering as he gracefully made his way to Y/N. “Well well, a little songbird wanted a private..” his eyes widened and then closed slowly, almost mischievously before he continued, “audience with me, hmm?” He cocked his head to the side before resting his chin to his hand. His fingers tapping his cheek one by one.
Swallowing her pride and comes closer to Philza. “I.. like Technoblade.”
Philza fakes a gasp acting shocked and surprised as he dramatically looked around. “Oh my! Meadowlark are you saying you have feelings for the pig man?” He teased before ruffling her hair.
Y/N pouted slightly and fixed her hair, “No I mean… like, like in a relationship way.” Philza paused for a moment. Resting his hand on her head.
“Have you told him yet songbird?”
“Well..no I haven’t, he was gone for a bit remember?”
Philza shakes his head, “You youngins, well if that’s all this is why did you want to speak?”
Y/N sheepishly looks down, Philzas hand still on her head. “If he.. didn’t want me there anymore I wanted to ask if you’d help me get somewhere safe this time.”
Philzas eyes widened in actual surprise. “You do remember the state he was in when you first left, yes?”
Y/N nods her head, “I do, but it’s just in case, I don’t want to be left without a plan this time.”
Philza finally removes his hand and places it on her chin instead.
This time it felt, different? It was Technoblade who had done this action before and she felt a burn in her chest. But with Philza it felt like it was friendly.
“Just see how it goes before we start planning an escape plan songbird.”
Y/N nods her head and says her farewells.
As Technoblade hears these words his heart pounded heavily in his chest. Before he could stall any longer he actually went inside his own cabin and frantically removed his cape and boots.
He landed himself on the couch reading one of his many books.
Y/N comes in and removes her own boots before joining him on the couch.
“What are you reading?” She looks over his shoulder, he can feel her warmth radiating off, her breath on his chest.
He was not going to survive.
“A book of mythology.”
It felt a bit monotone, but Y/N was still interested.
“Whose tale are you reading?” Technoblade shifted slightly, allowing her to see the book further.
“Theseus. It is my favorite. Do you know it?”
Y/N shakes her head no, she looks up to him softly, “Can you explain a bit of it for me?”
Technoblade smiled down at her, “For you? Anything. It all started in Trezena where he was born. He was given the task of bringing his father, who is the king of Athens, the sword and sandals that were left under a boulder to prove he was his son. He took them to Attica, where his father was, he faced many dangerous foes on his trip, of which he imitated Hercules, whom he looked up to, but succeeded with noble acts. He is recognized by his father as the Heir to the throne after successfully bringing them. Minos, the king of Crete and ordered for a tribute of 7 boys and 7 girls to be sacrificed. In this retelling, Theseus was one of the ones picked to be sacrificed. He was then tested to see if he was truly the son of his father. After which, the daughter of Minos, fell in love with Theseus and helped him kill the Minotaur.”
Y/N was could feel herself drawn into his speech, his reciting of the tale as if it was second nature.
“Thank you.. I would love to read it sometime.” Technoblade closes the book, the worn leather cover, shown much love and use over the years. He rubs his thumb over the cover gently.
“Have it. As a gift. To a new beginning.”
Technoblade gently places it into her hands, “It’s your favorite I couldn’t-“ Technoblade silences her gently and smiles.
“You can read it before bed tonight. You are here with me after all, I’m sure you won’t mind if I borrow it.” Y/N smiles at him and nods.
“You may always borrow it, could I ask a question before we are off to bed?”
“Always, Y/N.”
She has mentioned it to him once before, the desire to share a bed again, but this time differently. She had missed him greatly while he was gone.
The moment they shared under the falling snow. How warm his embrace was. She had to ask now, or she doesn’t know when she could pluck up the courage again.
“Could we sleep together?” Her mouth felt dry, and her heart raced, she couldn’t tell if he would be uncomfortable.
“I- yes, of course if it’s what you wish.”
Her question caught him by surprise, but he nodded. He knew she didn’t mean in the way that made his chest burn, and his position of sitting uncomfortable. She meant the soft innocence she always had.
He offers her his hand and leads her upstairs gently. Before making it into his room Y/N dashes in her own bedroom, grabbing her new soft plush blanket and pillow.
The book placed lovingly on the nightstand by his bed, they laid down facing each other.
It was a comfortable silence, before Y/N turned over and gently started scooting herself back into him.
Technoblade, being able to make out her doing so, gently, and cautiously wrapped his arm around her. His chest felt tight, but feeling how relaxed she was, he relaxed too.
Y/N got closer to his face, almost inches from it. The beating was so loud in his ears he thought they would burst.
“Just.. hold me.. I missed you.”
Technoblade blinked for a moment, just staring down at her. He almost robotically wrapped his arms around her and pulled her closer.
Y/N freely climbed into his lap and wrapped his cape around both of them.
Technoblade couldn’t tell if he was dreaming or if the cold had finally gotten to him after all these years.
He carefully wrapped his arms around her, gently bringing her in, “I missed you too, Y/N.”
Y/N couldn’t believe she had asked for that, she also couldn’t believe it had worked. For just a moment in time she was cradled in his embrace like the morning she slept beside him.
It felt like he engulfed her whole, his warmth spreading through her. Leaning over she began picking up flowers that were close enough.
Technoblade noticing her want for flowers used his longer reach and grabbed her more.
He watched her nimble fingers making some sort of chain from the flowers.
He snorted softly before resting his head atop her, after gathering a small pile for her.
The moment felt like it lasted forever, but not long enough at the same time. He held her closer, not letting even a moment pass where he wasn’t embracing Y/N.
“Technoblade..”
She attempts to look up at him and he moves his head from hers, looking down at her lap.
His heart stops for only a moment. A flower crown. Two of them.
She adjusts herself in his lap and places one on his head, placing the other on her own.
She grabs both of their drinks, “To something new and refreshing.” She holds her to clink to his.
“To something new and refreshing Y/N.” Knocking his cup to hers softly and both of them taking a sip.
They sat like this in silence for what felt like hours. Watching the sun reach its peak in the sky before being covered by clouds.
It was peaceful and like a blissful melody.
The snow started to fall just half an hour later.
Coating her hair softly, her h/c hair being sprinkled in a white dusting.
Technoblade could have cursed the very sky for that.
“I think it’s our time to head out.” She giggled softly before resting her head on his chest.
The food all but eaten, the tea cold and almost run dry.
Technoblade pats her head softly, carefully.
“I can’t have you getting sick, so I suppose so.”
He lifts her up gently from his lap, walking her over to Carl.
Y/N is blushing from the sudden cold and how effortlessly he carries her. Gently she is put onto Carl and the warmth of Technoblade is gone.
He swiftly removes his large red cloak and drapes it over her shoulders. He is still wearing his crown of flowers as he packs up the picnic. Attaching the items to Carls harness swiftly.
Technoblade hops onto Carl behind Y/N and begins the ride back home.
“Thank you for this Technoblade.. it was.. perfect.”
Technoblade rests his head on hers again as Carl trots happily.
“There will be more to had, but he’s Y/N, it was perfect.”
~~Timeskip~~
After coming home to the cabin Y/N went to her room and laid in the plush blankets and pillows Techno had gotten her.
His touch was all she could think of.
Technoblade had told her to take a hot shower after they got home and he would prepare dinner for them.
It feels like more should’ve happened, like she should’ve just gone for it finally.
Grinding her teeth she shoots out of bed and jumps into the shower. Yet she notices brand new shampoos and conditioners.
There was even body scrub. She giggled to herself and finally got to enjoy an everything shower, shaving, oil, and after it a nice lather of lotion.
By the end of it she was almost sweating. Rolling her eyes to herself forgetting the effort of an everything shower.
Getting into her new clothes, a comfortable oversized shirt and clothe shorts. These seem shorter than what Technoblade usually gets for her.
Walking from her room with still with wet hair.
Technoblade is leaning over a pot of… oh gods what is that?
She scurries down the stairs and comes up right beside him.
“Uhem… Techno what is that?”
Technoblade grunts to himself and shrugs his shoulders.
“I don’t know anymore.”
“Philzas?”
“Philzas.”
They both share a laugh and make their way to Philzas cabin where a pleasant aroma already fills the air.
The sun had begun to made it way higher into the sky, breathing in she made her way into his room.
Immediately noticing new blankets and pillows, along with a soft plush dress and thick tights laid out on her bed.
It was a thick f/c dress, it was a woven pattern, definitely knitted together carefully, it also had a flowy part for the skirt. It had a gentle feel to it, a bit girly for her taste. Running her hand over it, definitely warm and soft.
Feeling the black tights she realizes they are also lined with a thick fabric. Sighing to herself she makes her way into her bathroom, more soaps to wash herself and a new hairbrush.
Taking it as a sign Y/N takes a somewhat quick shower, styling her hair to her preference before adorning the dress and tights.
Y/N twirled in the mirror, the skirt flow around her, maybe she could let herself be cute for today. Using her hand she gently brushes down her skirt before putting on her boots. They stuck out a bit but it was better to have proper footwear for the tundra. Even if it was getting warmer.
She walks out of her room to see Technoblades door open still. Walking over she pokes her head through, her hands holding the doorframe gently.
He wasn’t there, befuddled, but curious Y/N walks into the room again and looks into his bathroom.
Empty, again.
Heading down the stairs with a flourish of her skirt behind her, not in the living room or kitchen either. With only one remaining option, grabbing her cloak and wrapping it around herself and heading out the door.
Y/N stopped in her tracks, Technoblade stood in front of her carrying a woven basket. One hand was used to hold the lead of Carl that was just behind him. Technoblade was also wearing a new pair of boots himself, they looked fancier than anything else he owned.
She smiles to her and walks to her and almost awkwardly displays herself.
“Thank you for the new dress.”
Technoblade smiles gently to her before snorting and avoiding her gaze momentarily. “It fits you, we have to take Carl to what I have planned.”
Technoblade offers her his hand to help her onto Carl, slowly but carefully she gets closer. But abruptly he drops to one knee.
Oh gods.
Y/N stars at him cautiously and he pats his knee, “You can’t exactly jump onto him. You aren’t the right…” he pauses, looking like he is trying to find the correct word, “height for it.”
Y/N playfully rolls her eyes before using his knee and hand to get herself onto Carl. She felt only a bit nervous, the last time Carl had bags, Technoblade was leading her into the forest to abandon her.
Abandon? Why would she think that, he was freeing her. She shakes her head, he promised to not leave.
Technoblade then takes Carls lead and begins to walk.
“Aren’t you coming up?”
“No need, it’s nicer to enjoy the scenery. There is no time limit for what I have planned.”
Y/N swallows audibly but hides her nervousness. What in the world is happening?
The walk is quiet besides the soft sound of snow crunching under hooves. Day by day Technoblade acts more “human” even though he very much isn’t one. She stares at the obvious reminder of his long pig like ears.
How do they feel? How did he get the scar across his face? As the trot continued it truly started to add up how little she knew of Technoblade
“Technoblade..” Y/N speaks softly as they grow nearer to where the surprise was planned.
His ears perk up softly as he turns his head just a bit to look at her in the corner of his eye. “Yes?”
She feels her face heat up, even the way he looks at her is different. She felt it in her chest what the feeling was but couldn’t admit it.
“Nothing.. how close are we?”
Technoblade looks back and stops for a movement looking at the trees. Y/N smiles to herself, he looks and is acting like a homing pigeon right now.
“Just a bit further. But for now close your eyes. It’ll only be a minute or two.”
Y/N nodded her head and closed her eyes, she swallowed nervously, her hands growing sweaty and her breathing picking up.
That was until she felt the gentle touch of Technoblades hand on her knee.
“Do I-“
“Open.”
Opening her eyes she sees a botanical clearing, filled with snow glories, winter jasmine, and snow drops. Her eyes widen as it leads up to the picnic basket and blanket laid out in the clearing.
At a loss for words, Y/N doesn’t even feel Technoblade snake his hands up to her hips gently taking her off of Carl.
“This is… beautiful…”
“I hope you like what I packed. No real cooking was involved.. so no fear in eating it.”
Y/N held back a small chuckle as she walked to the blanket and sat herself down comfortably. She watch Techno gently tie Carl to a tree with a loose hanging rope.
Joining her, he looked almost comically large on the blanket.
Opening the basket he pulled out a flask and set down some cups, chamomile tea filled the air as he poured them both some.
The food was simple sandwiches and cut fruit, Y/N happily bit into *your favorite fruit* and smiled at him.
“Thank you Technoblade this is beyond what I imagined.”
The light hitting her eyes just right to show a sparkle of light, or Technoblade wonders if it had been there the whole time.
“We can have more of these if you’d like.”
He tried to be delicate and bite into an apple, but his tusks dug into it making it harder.
Y/N took the apple from his hands and took a small pocket knife from her pocket and carved him out a piece, “I could almost forget you have those sometimes if they weren’t butting into everything.”
Technoblade flushes for a moment before taking the apple from her hands, his fingers lingering for longer than they should.
Technoblade cleared his throat slightly, “I wanted to ask if you are happy with me.”
Y/N almost choked on her tea as she looked at him, “If I’m happy?”
Technoblade offed a curt nod, “I don’t want you feeling pressured to stay.”
“I am happy but..” she trailed off looking to her lap, Technoblades hand on her chin lifted up her to meet her gaze.
“But what Y/N.”
“I don’t know anything about you. You’re a stranger.”
Technoblade shocked, freezes up, his hand lingering on her soft skin before running his hand through his hair.
“Then what would you like to know.”
In a moment of her own shock she looks at the scar on his face. “A starting point would be your scar, and anything of your past.” Y/N felt bold and wanted to get closer so she went for the most obvious questions first.
Technoblade removes his hand from her face and touches his own, fingers touching the rough edges of it. Contemplating softly to himself.
“It was during my escape from Lmanburg. This…” His lips draw to a fine line before continuing, “Man named Quackity tried fighting off as I escaped from a death penalty. I put a pickaxe through his teeth, he sliced a sword through my cheek.”
Y/N absentmindedly reached for his cheek, he grabbed her wrist softly and brought it to his face leaning closer to her. Her touch made his skin feel like it was on fire.
Both of their breathing was visible in the air, “But you didn’t get the death penalty because you’re here.”
“Back to what I said about escaping it.” He smirks softly and leans closer into her touch.
“Then my past, I was known.. as The Blade.”
Her hand freezes. The blade? The blood god. Technoblade… it was in his name the whole time.
Her eyes go wide.
He was the one who blew up Lmanburg.
The history books at Dreams castle made that so clear.
Technoblade senses her worry and fear, “I stopped that life a long time ago, I settled in away from drama to live with Philza. I haven’t killed a soul since.”
The rugged attitude makes sense now. But the man she saw the night she planned to die is not the one in front of her.
Her fingers relax and she moves them closer to his ear.
“May I?”
Technoblade nods softly. Her fingers stroking and caressing his ear gently. Technoblade is becoming more noticeably red and his breathing quickens.
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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I’m not sure if you’ve noticed or if my tumblr is acting up but you’ve linked Chapter 25 on the master list instead of 26!! just wanted to let you know :D
It for sure wasn’t your tumblr! I did accidentally link chapter 25, thank you for telling me!! It’s all fixed now 😌☺️
A/N: hellloooo I was curious and wanted to drop a question for my lovely readers, what has been your favorite chapter so far? 👀
The morning dew rests atop the spruce trees, the sun having melted just the fairest amount of snow.
Technoblade had made it back just slightly earlier than he expected, the feelings of excitement was making him walk faster back to the cabin.
He was nervous she would be gone, but he trusted her promise. The cabin finally in sight he begins to make more of jog toward the door.
The cold but refreshing air had him breathing out soft puffs of smoke. Snorting to himself he kicks his boots at the front of the door to knock off snow and opens the cabin.
Almost shell shocked he notices how much cleaner it is, the couch no longer had tears, even the high shelves only he could see the top of were cleaned.
It was all the more evidence she stayed. His heart felt like it was pounding in his ears even for a moment. He set down the basket gently on the table, before shaking his head and hiding it in a cabinet.
Her picnic would be later today and he had to make sure it was good enough to earn her trust. He looked to the top of the stairs and smiled softly to himself. His bottom tusks scraping against his upper lip softly.
He never realized they did that, he had never smiled much, but with Y/N around. It felt different, easier for him to do so freely.
He opened the bag of things she had asked for, and some extras. He finally got her a proper bed spread, new thick blankets and pillows that were soft.
He cringed to himself that he had left her with the almost paper thin blankets for so long after promising to her to be better. He couldn’t change how long it took, but he can change it now.
He only removes the blankets leaving the additional items that were in the bag still there. He makes his way up to her door and knocks softly.
His ears perk softly, trying to listen for her movement of stirring.
He knocks again.
It’s still silent.
His eyes grow wide, he knocks a bit louder.
“Y/N?” He whispers talks. “I have returned from the village.”
She always wakes up to him speaking, his heart grew heavy and his hand hesitated towards the knob.
Unlocked.
He twists it open gently and his eyes dart to her bed.
E
M
P
T
Y
.
His whole body stops as the door slowly opens the rest of the way.
He swallows the lump in his throat.
She promised…
But he promised to not hunt her.
He grinds his teeth, not from anger but frustration at his only failure to prove himself.
He lays the blankets and pillows down at her bed and strokes it softly. Just as he was going to leave his eyes spot it.
Her journal on the dresser in her room.
She would never leave without it. Maybe she was just out?
He leaves her room with more questions than answers, the thought of her having left is very slim now. But it doesn’t leave his mind as he walks towards his own room.
The door was shut and he opens it without caution.
His heart beats in his chest.
Curled up in his bed, one of his shirts wrapped around his pillow, her face nuzzled so deeply into it, was Y/N, his Y/N.
He stares fondly at the display, had she missed him so much she went into his room to sleep with his belongings?
To go as far to simulate her lying on his chest with the shirt put on a pillow.
The smile returns to his face as he walks quietly and closer. Trying to take in every beautiful feature of the display in front of him.
Her messy hair, how her eyelashes lay upon her cheeks, the way her lips are pressed together. The rise of her shoulders and chest as she breaths.
All of her features that only she has. How enchanted he is by the simple look of her, her body is uniquely hers, her hands so small compared to his, but he wouldn’t trade them for anyone else’s.
The fingerprints, the only ones to exist in this world or the next, yours, one of kind, no one else’s would do in his eyes, the only ones he craves to hold dear.
His thought breaks.
She moves and shifts in her sleep, he walks closer and his land reaches out. He so softly caresses her hair to the side.
This gentle act causes her to stir from her slumber. She groans softly and lazily opens one of her eyes.
The image of Technoblade appears, his hair softly dusted in melted snow. His cape damp and dripping softly onto the floor.
As she wakes up she realizes how he has caught her, in his bed snuggled up his shirt.
Her face slowly begins to dust with pink, yet his hand hasn’t moved away, instead he trails his thumb over her cheek.
“Good morning Y/N.” Technoblade says in a soft whisper.
Biting her lip and feeling sheepish, “Good morning Techno- I.. I can explain why I’m in here.”
Technoblade smiles softly at her, moving his hand to flatten down her hair and using his other hand helps her into a sitting position to look at him better.
“There is no need. This cabin is also your home, if you prefer my room we can make arrangements. Did you sleep comfortably?”
She nods her head and can feel her heart pound in her chest. “Thank you.. but I wouldn’t want to take your room from you.”
“We can share it from time to time if it pleases you.” Technoblade himself becomes a little sheepish as well, “It wouldn’t be the first time we slept in the same bed together.”
Y/Ns face flushes completely now, remembering I’m such detail how wonderful it felt to wake up next to him that morning. Even when they both woke up the very day he let her go free, they had an unspoken moment of enjoying the others embrace.
Y/N reach’s up slightly, and grabs his wrist gently, “I’d like to share a bed together again sometime. It was warm.. and..” her thoughts trail off before Technoblade gently places his hand on her shoulder.
“We can do whatever you’d like, but for today, I’d suggest getting ready.”
Y/N looks confused but lets go of his wrist and looks up at him. He still keeps his hair down and unbraided after her comment of his looking more approachable like this.
He really took that to heart.
She smiles softly and nods her head.
“Thank you, I’ll go get ready.”
Technoblade watches her leave and smiles to himself, he just has to get today right. He won’t let anything happen.
Technoblade had just left her room, he was genuine about telling her when he would leave, but not only that he asked for what she had liked to eat.
The feeling in her stomach felt fluttery, he had shown care and considered her feelings when leaving. Not only that he left her alone here but she is able to roam the cabin on her own.
Swallowing a lump in her throat and making her way to her bed. She wondered just why he would go so far to change to simply have her stay.
Two days.
Two days without Technoblade in the cabin with her. It felt freeing but just slightly scary.
For the rest day Technoblade was gone she respected his privacy, she stayed in the living room and listened to the records he had collected. Though after finally finishing all her notes and entries in her journal that she had missed out on adding over the weeks.
She sat and really looked around the cabin. Had it always been this…dusty?
The more she stewed on the couch the more irritated she became. How does a grown man- pig man live in these conditions?
Rolling her eyes and rolling up her sleeves she made that her ‘thank you’ for Technoblade trying to be better.
Reorganizing his shelves, cleaned and wiping any surface she could reach. Though when it became painfully obvious there were things she simply couldn’t reach on her own, she puzzled for a moment.
A light bulb lit up in her head, she slipped into some slippers Techno had gotten her and knocked on Philzas door.
“Mmmm pal you already asked and-“ Philza stops mid sentence and his wings flutter behind him.
“Why isn’t it my lovely meadow lark coming to say hello?”
“Hello Philza, Technoblade told me he was going to the market and getting me things. As my way to thank him I wanted to clean his cabin.”
The smile was itching its way to face as he raised an eyebrow for her to continue.
“I.. well I can’t reach the top shelves. And Technoblade doesn’t own a ladder or step stool. Could you- I don’t know lift me up? Or help me clean?”
Philza takes a piece of her hair and twirls it around his talon, “oh my sweet songbird I’d love to help, I’ll be your ladder for your surprise for Techno. But as payment you’ll make me dinner hmm? Sound good?”
Y/N was practically ecstatic, she nods her head and Philza joins her on the short walk back to Technoblades cabin.
Philza would lift Y/N in any way it seemed fit, holding her bridal style or simply lifting her up by her hips to get the higher shelves. It was friendly and nice banter back and forth.
At the end of it, Y/N cooked a nice roasted chicken with garlic mashed potatoes.
All in all, the first day without Technoblade wasn’t bad.
Yet when night fell and Y/N crawled into her bed for the night, she felt lonelier. It felt colder in the house, and it was just because the fireplace wasn’t going downstairs.
She wrapped herself in her blanket, realizing she should’ve asked for a thicker one when he offered, brushing it off she makes her way to Technoblades room.
He would never know, and she would tell herself it was just because his blanket was thicker. But there was no excuse for going into his closet and grabbing one of his iconic white shirts and putting it on a pillow.
There was no sane rationality for her actions. She missed him, she missed waking up in his arms for the few times it happened.
She wanted Technoblade, she came back because he promised to be better and was showing how serious he was.
Crawling into his bed and wrapping herself in his blankets, she laid her head on the pillow with his shirt. And slept almost as soundly as when she would wake up in his arms.
Y/N could only hope it would happen again soon. But this was one the first day he was gone.
Y/N slept peacefully through the night waking up and stretching slowly. Rubbing her face against the pillow and smiling to herself. If he hadn’t shown improvement she knows she wouldn’t have stayed for long.
She strokes Technos shirt softly, sticking her face back in it gently and breathing in. When her eyes open she knows that smell, it’s safe, it’s calm, it’s… home.
Grinding her teeth she lets the fear of becoming comfortable try to slip away. Even if he decides to go back to his old ways, she’s escaped a bad situation before and she will do it again.
Maybe trusting Technoblade will be a good decision. Trusting again could be a good decision.
Getting up from his bed and going to her own room, quickly getting dressed into some clothe black shorts and a long sleeve white shirt. Breathing in, and she begins to clean the rest of the cabin. Scrubbing and mopping the floors, she even takes time to fix the upholstery to the couch with a sewing kit she had found under the coffee table.
It looked very unused that Y/N wonders if Technoblade could even thread a needle. She laughs to herself softy at the thought of Technoblade trying to thread a needle with his hands.
His hands, the same one that reached so gently for her face the day before. Her cheeks flush and before she attempts to shake off the thought she embraces it.
The tender moment.
He wanted to respect her boundaries. She had to tell him she was okay with his touches. Slowly but surely, she will let herself get close to another.
She works herself all day practically. She tends to some of the vegetables outside, leaving them in a basket in the kitchen.
After the gardening was done she enjoyed feeding and petting Carl. Before she returned back inside the cabin she took a moment to stare into a small puddle that had melted only slightly.
Warmer days were coming, at least slightly warmer. She reaches down and lets the water ripple under her fingertip, distorting her reflection. A smile finds its way to her and she goes back inside.
The cabin was basically spotless, the fireplace burning softly as she got herself a cup of tea and sat down on the couch with a blanket over her lap. Mundane.
This was the life she dreamed of after Dreams abuse, all of the kingdom drama, just simple, peaceful, finally a step into the direction she truly wanted.
The day ended and she found herself going back into Technoblade room, snuggling right back up into her shirt. After the long day of chores she was out like a light.
When morning came, so did Technoblade, knocking the snow off his boots at the door. And finally coming home.
It has almost been a full week since he had turned Y/Ns lock around on her door, a week since she promised not to leave in the middle of the night.
Yet in that week Technoblade felt as thought he had made no progress making her feel more comfortable. They have idle chatter, but he usually doesn’t see her because she is in her room. Sometimes he wonders to himself if he truly did turn the lock around and she’s been stuck in there.
But walking by the door he sees that the lock isn’t there and turns the thoughts away. In frustration he begins to think of ways to interact with her more, but keeping it on her terms.
Just the other day he asked if she’d like to help feed to Carl, she seemed hesitant but agreed. It was small talk about if she needed anything or would like anything but Y/N had said she was content with her belongings.
He rested his hands on his temples. He dreaded asking Philza for any advice on how to get closer to her. Technoblade reminds himself constantly, she was imprisoned here, it will take her much long to be comfortable. But hasn’t it been enough time?
Rolling his eyes he hears the stairs creaking and watches Y/N with a quill in her mouth carrying cups and bowls from her room. In a moment he was up and gently taking them from her, their hands touching softly. His heart was pounding from the brief contact. Reminding him of how soft she was in his arms.
His face stoic and composed, “I’ll take care of these.”
Y/N smiles up at him and thanks him before returning back up the stairs. Taking the dishes to the sink he snorts under his breath. How did a mortal, how did SHE make him feel like this. He didn’t know how to feel, but he wanted to be better for her.
Swallowing his pride and leaving the dishes undone he makes his way to Philzas cabin. Determined for an idea to spend time with her properly.
Technoblade knocks on the door firmly but not aggressive. Some light clatter is heard before Philza is smiling ear to ear and cocking his head to the side. He was flying just lightly in the air as he began to rolling to his back to stare at Technoblade upside down.
“Well hi there mate’ whatcha need?”
The grinding of Technoblades teeth is audible. “I need help.”
Philza drops the cocky act and his wings flutter and he is firmly on the ground to see Technoblade. His ear perked and eyes sharpened. “With what pal?”
“I need… to know her better.”
Philzas face contorts softly before relaxing. Then he bellows out a laughter, holding his stomach and bending slightly. He wipes a fake tear from his eye before flicking it off and checking his talons sassily.
“You need help planning a date for the lovely songbird~”
“I didn’t say it was a date.”
“Oh, yes, yes just a friendly get together after you begged her to come back yes, yes my bad.” Philza raises an eyebrow before fluttering softly again, “Not many choices out here, but it’s gonna warmer since we are entering February.”
Technoblade grinds his teeth, he hadn’t realized just how long it had been since he had taken Y/N in. “So what do you suggest?”
“Hmm, well considering you are a hopeless brute, how about a picnic for the girl? Gives you time to learn about her and some ~alone time~” Philza raises his eyebrows softly and gives Technoblade a look.
“A… picnic? But we have dinner at home. And lunch. Along with breakfast. What sense does it make to take it into the forest?”
Philza deadpans for a moment. “Pal, is the eating at home working for conversation?”
Technoblade lips draw a line. “I wouldn’t know what to pack.”
Philzas feels his hair almost visibly becoming white as he squints his eyes. “We have known her since mid December and you haven’t a single clue what this meadowlark likes?”
Technoblade snorts, “Didn’t have a reason to find out what a prisoner likes.” He crosses his arms and tries to think back to anything she had expressed a liking to.
None crossed his mind.
“I’ll be making a trip into the nearby town. I need to get ‘picnic’ supplies. If I see anything she might like, maybe I’ll get it.”
“Alright you big lug, be sure to say goodbye to her at least!” Philza calls out as Technoblade closes the door abruptly to Philzas cabin.
Technoblade makes his way back into his own cabin, grabbing a satchel of gold and emerald, with a flourish adorning his red cape. He only grabs one weapon, his trusty axe and slides it into his belt.
He knocks softly on Y/Ns door, a softer rustling that almost could’ve made him drop to his knees is heard, a soft “Coming.”
“Yes?”
“I am headed into town, do you need anything? I will be gone for two days.”
Y/N looks at him almost shocked, perhaps she didn’t expect him to be honest about telling her when he would leave. “I.. I don’t think so, maybe a new hairbrush? Soap?”
“Is there any food you’d like the cabin to have?”
Y/N blinks almost robotically, “Food?”
“Yes, you have only been eating what I have planted. We can begin an area in the garden for things you enjoy.”
Y/N thinks for a moment, “I’d like F/F. I used to love it as a kid.”
Her favorite fruit. Technoblade finally learned something new about her. With a nod he leaves her room and heads to the village.
Y/N watched carefully as Technoblade placed her bowl down and sat once more. There was too many things that had changed in such a short time.
Could she trust this would last, and if it does would she want to stay?
Too many thoughts running through her head she doesn’t pick her spoon back up, Technoblade waves his hand in front of her face.
“I didn’t do anything to it. You can continue eating.” His words shook her out of her momentary shock, “Ah thank you, I just got distracted.”
The rest of the meal was uneventful, Y/N stay sat as Technoblade cleaned the dishes. Y/N began putting the food away, the room felt almost tense.
Y/N sucked in her cheeks, chewing the inside of her mouth before speaking, “I’ll be heading to bed now.” Was all she said before turning on her heel quickly. She didn’t even wait for a response before making her way upstairs.
Had she really gone insane? How was this even happening right now? What was the plan?
Sliding down to the floor and staring at her bed, but this time she knew it was really hers. She was welcome here and free to stay, the lock still facing the rest of the cabin made her uneasy, but until tomorrow nothing could be done or known for sure that it would change.
The bars on her window were also troubling, sighing loudly and running her fingers through her hair. In almost a huff she makes her way to her bed and plops down.
The sheets were only slightly thicker than the cabin on the woods, but supplied better comfort. The exhaustion overcame her body, and she was asleep before she could think of how insane this all was.
The light shining through her window was shockingly not the first thing to wake her up from her sleep but a knock on her door.
She sits her and blinks slowly, staring at the door. A knock? Right. New privacy in her “home” from Technoblade. Means no barging in unexpectedly anymore.
Another knock is heard before she calls out to come in.
Technoblade is stood there with a few tools and almost awkwardly gestures to the door.
“I wanted to fix the lock and put it on your side.”
“That’s fines, I just woke up, I’ll get changed in the bathroom.”
“Would you…” the question hangs on Technoblades tongue. But it doesn’t come out before he shakes his head and drops to the floor with a grunt.
Y/N wanted to know what he was going to say but, couldn’t push it, grabbing clothes and getting into the bathroom.
She stares at herself for a moment, really contemplating if this was real or an afterlife after falling asleep in the snow.
What switch flipped so quickly that he would begin to care so much? And why did she so badly want to know why?
Meaning she had two options to find out…
Would she ask Philza what happened?
Or try to talk to Technoblade himself?
Getting dressed the question and her options rolled in her head.
Maybe this could bring them closer together? But is it safer to keep her own distance?
Getting dressed, she sat on her bed and stared at Technoblade working. His hands seemed a little too large for the work he was doing.
Breaking the silence she finally asks, “What happened while I was gone?”
The air in the room grew sharp and Technoblade froze, “Why does it matter?”
Drawing a frown she replies, “Because if I stay here I want to know.”
“If I tell you, you will stay permanently?” Technoblade glances back, an almost hopeful look in his eyes. “You’d have to promise me that.”
Y/N sits firmly and her shoulders stiffen. “The price of knowing is staying here forever then? So I’m a prisoner again?”
Technoblade shakes his head no, the door knob falls to the floor, he walks carefully over to her before dropping to his knees. Taking her hand into his and looking into her eyes softly.
“You will always be allowed to leave, but if you’re leaving for good, you’ll tell me and…”
His shoulders drop, and he looks down to her lap, “So I know if it is truly a goodbye forever.” He tilts his head back up to hers, “I cannot bear the thought of waking up..”
His hand trails to her hair but stops just before touching it, pulling his own arm back, “The thought of waking up one morning and you having left in the middle of the night.. I couldn’t.. I wouldn’t get to say goodbye.”
Her mouth is dry and she sees how much he has grown attached for the first time. The look in his eyes. “I promise.”
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Hey guys! Still alive and still gonna finish this fic, Christmas around the corner and my boyfriends MASSIVE family has had me crocheting and gift searching in a majority of my free time, but I do want to get the chapter I’m working on soon! Love you guys!!!!
The walk back to the cabin was a bit longer than expected, Y/N started to wonder if Technoblade was purposely making the trip longer to keep her close.
The growing worry of him lying about not having the rope anymore did bounce around in her head, contemplating running away on the first village trip, or just seeing how this new chance began.
Finally seeing the familiar sight of the clearing and Technoblades cabin Y/N sat up more and breathed a sigh of relief.
A shower, actual food, a shower and a proper brush, the shower kept going through her head. Finally freshening up would be a dream come true after staying in the forest for a week.
Marching to the stable, Technoblade hops off first, gingerly grabbing Y/N by the waist and placing her down before putting Carl back into his stable.
“Have you eaten yet?” Technoblade turns back to her, raising an eyebrow as he takes her hand and starts leading her back to his cabin.
Y/N looks down sheepishly, “I had a potato today but that’s about it.” Technoblade almost chuckles to himself before opening the door, Y/N notices the handle is broken but doesn’t make a comment.
Seeing Philza on the couch, she waves to him softly, he almost instantly jumps up, “Songbird! You are actually safe, and back.”
“Yeah, I am, and I-“ she notices his wing and grows worried expression, “Your wing, what happened?”
Philza tucks it back behind himself, “That’s not important right now dove, let’s get you both cleaned and eating food.” He smiles down at her and pats her on the head softly.
He then wraps a wing around his face, “Cause truthfully you both need a wash at this point.”
Both Y/N and Techno grow sheepish, before nodding along with him. “I’ll, go to my room and wash up before dinner.”
She adjusts her clothes before beginning to walk away from them, feeling Technoblade wanting to follow her, his eyes burning into the back of her skull.
Philza places his hand on Technos shoulder to hold him back for a moment, “I can tell by how she is acting you promised her something big. Now tell me how you got her to come back.”
Snorting before he replies Techno brushes Phil’s hand off him, “No more rope, no more rules, she lives here as… an equal.”
Philzas jaw could have dropped, “Well big man looks like you have some trust to earn, and a shower to take.” Philza adds the last part playfully as he goes into the kitchen.
“Dinner will be ready for you two when you get out.
~To Y/N~
Walking into her room again, she never got to properly say goodbye to it last time. Yet she noticed her blanket was across the room.
Picking it up and placing it back on the bed it smelled like.. Techno. Her heart tightens in her chest at the thought of him being in here and missing her.
Shaking the absurd thought away, she finally peels off her clothing, giving them a smell she gags and throws them into a corner.
Her wardrobe was left the same and picking out the softest and comfiest shirt and shorts and gladly hopping into the shower.
Washing herself thoroughly she tries to think of what she got herself back into. But the feeling of the soap running down her back and rinsing her hair takes the thoughts away just as quickly as they came.
After her relatively long shower she wipes the mirror of fog, thoughtfully brushing her hair and drying it as best she can.
The clothes feel like a warm hug and a welcome relief to the turtleneck she had been wearing for so long.
Staring at herself in the mirror she contemplates how to handle the new freedom. It’s almost what she wanted, a home, food, safety. But the company.. squinting her eyes she closes the door to the bathroom as she leaves.
Grabbing a pair of socks slipping them on and her hand trembles on the handle of the door leading back into the main cabin.
So many nights of trying to open the door, hoping it had been left unlocked for her to escape. Her breathing picks up and her heart pounding, no it’s different it’s different now Techno promised.
It opens and she sees Technoblade leaving his room at the same night in a lounge shirt and comfortable pants. Philzas happy chirping is heard from downstairs, smiling at Techno softly before making her way down.
“And now you look both look clean and smell better, I made some vegetable soup since uhem we are currently out of meat.” Philza says side eyeing Technoblade slightly.
Y/N could feel her mouth watering at the sight of it and sits down at the table, kicking her legs nervously. The events of what she now refers to as “The Mashed Potato Incident”
Both Technoblade and Philza can see her discomfort, but breaking her thoughts Philza places a cold glass of water and her soup in front of her. “Eat up meadowlark, there’s plenty extra.”
Taking her spoon and eating slowly, the carrots and celery melt in her mouth. Smiling she looks back to Philza, “It tastes amazing thank you Philza.” Nodding back at her he stretches his good wing.
“You two sleep well tonight, I’m returning to l cabin.” Y/N draws her lips into a line as she waves goodbye to him. Leaving Technoblade and her alone. Techno gets his food and sits across from her silently.
The meal is peaceful almost, and then, “If you need more shampoo and soap let me know. I’ll tell you when I’m leaving the house for long trips.”
“Will the door be locked?” Y/N lets the questions leave her lips before she could think of the repercussions. Techno looks down somberly, “Not unless you wish it to be, I’ll switch the handle around so you can lock your door freely. But as I promised, no more locked doors.”
Y/N smiles and thanks him before returning to her food, after finishing her bowl she moves to get up before Techno places his hand out. “I will get it, do you want more?”
Nodding her head and trying to relax her shoulders. This Technoblade is a different man than the one she last saw.
With his wing injured and having seen Techno leave the cabin, he curses to himself slightly making his way to the nearest bathroom, stretching out his wing slightly he can see his feathers are coated in a thin layer of blood.
Sighing he begins to wash them slowly, bending his wing forward and pick the leaves and branches out. Wincing at each touch, he realizes he will be groundbound for a while after his reckless flying.
Massaging his temples he finally gets the blood off and grabs gauze and some ointment, applying a thick coat to his wing and them gingerly wrapping it up to prevent further bleeding.
Flexing his wing cautiously, he definitely sprained it, not broken but in a hells worth of pain.
Finally finishing the tiresome task he sees Carl ride up to the cabin, shaking his head he grabs a lantern and attaches it to Carls harness and gives him a tap on the rump to go back into the forest.
Rolling his eyes tired of playing dad and caretaker, takes a glass from a cupboard and pouring himself a generous amount of berry juice before plopping onto Technoblades couch.
If Technoblade needed him in battle he would have already heard the whistle blow Techno uses for danger.
Until then, he hopes for the best and tries to keep his mind occupied on something other than Y/N's impending doom alone or Technoblades crazed fleeing of the cabin.
~To Y/N~
Y/N began to make herself as presentable as possible, having shed her few tears after running through her options.
It almost wasn't a hard decision but she was done being a puppet, a plaything, a prisoner, something to entertain someone else. This choice she would make all on her own, the moon was full and welcoming.
She only wished for the night sky to swallow her whole, to be in the plush snow and fall asleep peacefully. She had always been fond of the cold, never liking how the DSMP kingdom never got any.
Swallowing her pride, looking back at the bread that had finally gone stale, in her hand she gripped the clothe Technoblade had wrapped it in, smiling faintly at it before tucking it into her pocket and adjusting her turtleneck for the last time.
Brushing her hair back, she wished she would leave the world a little more put together, but not everyone gets the choice of when they depart, at least she could make the choice.
Tying her shoes for the last time, making sure they were all set, dawning her cloak she looked at her reflection in the mirror. Touching it softly to see who she had become, would her mother and father be proud this is how their daughter lived her life?
Grinding her teeth and looking down at herself, she needed this, nothing would get better, the thought of wishing she had spent more time in Technoblade cabin just to say goodbye.
Breathing in deeply she puts her hand on the cold door knob, twisting it slowly with her eyes closed expecting to be hit with the unforgiving cold but it felt... blocked?
She opens her eyes and sees a very disheveled Technoblade, a cut over his forehead, obviously breathing heavy and sweating regardless of the frigid wind.
Their eyes lock and it feels like her own voice is caught in her throat as she freezes in fear, wondering if she will be taken back to the cabin against her will.
She opens her mouth to speak before Techno drops to his knees, she noticed he looks almost frailer? "Y/N.... you're okay." His voice sounded more of a whimper and she could look directly in his eyes instead of looking up.
Still tied in fear and almost relief she can't say anything before he begins again, "If it is against your wishes, you do not have to come back. But at least let me escort you properly this time." He was obviously out of breath, a pleading look in his eyes almost beckoning her to return.
"Technoblade... I can't willingly go back to being your prisoner.. I.." He stops her before her words can continue, grabbing her hands into his cold palms, encompassing hers completely.
"No rope, no rules, no lock down, nothing will be the same. I swear it to you. On my honor, you will be free to explore, you can use Carl, you can use my weapons my armor. Just..." He looks down to the ground her voice quivering "Just come back safely where I can feed and clothe you."
Her thoughts are full and almost unreadable as she looks at Technoblade, her eyes blown wide, she had planned to die in the snow not seeing Technoblade beg before her to return to his cabin.
Her arms begin to feel heavy, her heart pounding in her chest, mouth dryer than it had ever felt before as she gazed upon the shell of a man Technoblade once was. Was he truly willing to change.
Grinding her teeth, her hands begin to sweat and she bites her lip, it's not rational, its absurd, but a part deep down inside herself wants to believe him. His cabin was nice, they could actually bond...
She tightens her hands are his and slips one out to touch his chin softly to tilt his head up to her, reaching into her pocket she grabs the clothe, running it over the blood slowly starting to stream down his face.
"I'll come back, but if I feel like a prisoner again... you won't ever see me again." Technoblade hand tightens over hers and he nods before standing up and dusting himself off, looking almost shocked she had agreed.
"No prisoner you can see Phil as much as you want, I can take you to the village quite a ways away, just... thank you Y/N. For coming back."
He doesn't release her hand, instead interlocking their fingers and gently closing the door behind them. His almost cold personality returns for just a moment before he takes a large inhale and whistles loudly.
Y/N opens her mouth to question his actions before she sees Carl happily trotting back to them with a piece of grass in his mouth, chomping away like he wasn't in the middle of a forest at the dead of night.
Technoblade looks almost a little amused and takes the lantern from Carls harness and chuckles to himself softly.
"Are you ready, or do you need anything?" Technoblade turns to her and has a very faint smile on his face.
Y/N blinks a bit, letting go of Technoblades hand and runs back into the cabin grabbing her journal and satchel and rushes back out, "Ready now. As ready as I can be."
Technoblade takes a moment to look her up and down, questioning to himself why she had been dressed at this late at night, deciding not to question her on her readiness, instead wrapping his hands around her waist and gently placing her on Carl before joining her.
He wraps his hands around her to grab his reigns and places the lantern in her hands, "I'll have you hold the light unless you know how to ride a horse properly."
She shakes her head sheepishly before holding the lantern out to light the way, "Yeahhhh no, I'll let you guide us, I don't even know where I am in the forest."
Technoblade raises an eyebrow, "You are in the east fields, the cabin you were at was my old home before Philza joined me. I was curious on how you had found it."
"Genuine dumb luck I guess." Her mind goes back to the table carving and smiles, before tucking herself further into his chest for warmth, noticing her soft shivers Technoblade adjusts his cloak to cover more of her.
It felt like the first actual conversation they had held, maybe it would be different?
Continuing through the forest slowly, admiring the gently scenery she sees...
A doe.
But it's not alone this time, it's mother was there right beside it as they traveled the snowy terrain.
A soft and welcoming sight, she smiles to herself, this time would be different, she would make it different.
One not starting with death of an innocent doe, but true feelings.
Lowkey obsessed with the fic since I like toxic to healthy dynamics 😭 Might draw some stuff but its gonna be posted on passerineau since im a weak man much love
You’re so real for that I couldn’t like find any toxic to healthy fanfics for techno and I was like MAN ILL DO IT MYSELF buttttt hopefully a new chapter is coming out tonight 👀👀👀
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In the week that it had been since Y/N had left Technoblades cabin, she had finally gotten herself set up just a bit. She had been scavenging for material, made a makeshift fire outside her new home and used branches to hold up any food she would cook. Her potatoes were still miles better than the ones Technoblade had fed, even the thought of it as she nibbled on her food made her laugh softly to herself.
The memory was bittersweet, because each time it passed through her mind she wondered our Technoblade and Philza were doing. Shaking her head and disregarding the thoughts quickly after, because she was starting a new life and she was....
She blinks harshly and looks at her home, she hadn't found any sheep just, or any animals truly to make a better blanket for herself. The nights were the worse, she wondered if one morning she wouldn't wake up because she had frozen to death.
The new freedom didn't come without struggle, the potatoes took too long to grow to be sustainable for her long term, she had been surviving with melted snow for water, making sure to get the freshest snow in the mornings. Luckily there was a small wooden bucket left in the cabin and she could fill it over night and somewhat heat it over the fires as long as she didn't get too close.
Biting her lower lip and finishing her potato, she looks at the loaf of bread sitting on the desk and the now empty glass bottle of berry juice. Every thing here reminds her of him, even she started to believe that he once lived here, even without proper proof.
Pursing her lips into a line she sits down at the desk and runs her fingers over the carving of the sword. She had added her first initial carved into a sword/bow/shield(you pick whichever is easiest for your initial) her shoulders slump slightly. Y/N she couldn't go on for much longer, but without a proper way to return to the cabin she wondered if she would even make it back or even find a village or city.
She rubbed her temples and continued to trace her fingers over the carvings, gently and slowly, glancing outside it was maybe midday? What she wouldn't do for a clock to just tell what time it was.
She finishes tracing over the last stroke of the carving and gets up abruptly pacing around the room, should try to find some vines and leave a trail to the cabin, but the snow would cover them. If she stayed in exactly a straight line from where ever she left she might be able to find her way back.
She bites her nails and runs a hand through her hair, the cold wooden floor beneath her socks talking her back to reality only for a moment to realize that she hadn't bathed or brushed her own hair in a week.
She lets out an audible sigh and collapses onto her bed face first. Her legs dangling off the side, she wonders what she could do, she could head back towards the Dream Smp Kingdom but if any of Dreams guards saw her she knows she would be hanged or worse become his 'princess' again.
There was no where, no one she could turn to, the only option would be....
She could wait to walk into the snow, staring at the moonlight and....
~To Philza~
The flying couldn't have hurt more than it did now, the sun was beginning to set but the only thing that kept Philza going was the hope to find Y/N where ever she might be. Trees after trees there was no end in sight.
He decided to perch onto a tree and rest for just a moment opening with map and crossing out the areas he had just checked, closing his eyes and chittering softly and he rubbed his hurt wing.
With his wing hurt he had not gotten as far as he first planned to, but it could take days to heal at this point. Slumping against the tree and closing his eyes, watching colors of yellow and orange blend together in the sky.
His claws only slightly digging into his own wing before flexing them out, he decided that if she was in this area that she would need a fire to keep warm and maybe, just maybe he would see the smoke.
Philza was truly running out of ideas and was beginning to assume the worst until..
His heart stopped, a column of smoke, he began to breathe heavily, it was too far East he couldn't have thought Y/N had made it so far.
But no one would get past Technos security, wait Techno hadn't been patrolling for at least 8 days now. His eyes sharpen and he grinds his teeth, Techno had to be told.
With the slim hope it was her, or the worse idea that someone had come into their forest.
The flight was faster than the exploring because Philza knew the exact way home, he bursts into Technos cabin, closing his wings only briefly to fit through the door.
They seriously needed to fix the handle soon, because if it wasn't her, they would have unexpected vistors.
After arriving up the stairs to Y/Ns old room he opens the door huffing and puffing as he walks to Technos side.
"Get up. There is smoke coming from the forest. So either someone in our forest or Y/N is starving to death eastward."
The very idea of Y/N starving in the forest shot Technoblades eyes wide open. Finally letting go of her blanket, rolling his shoulders and holding a stern expression. "East?"
It was the first word Technoblade had said in the time Y/N had left, with a quick nod from Philza, Technoblade walked to his room adorning his signature red cape, grabbing his netherite sword and a lead.
The movements were as fluid as breathing and Philza could tell Technoblade was not joking around about seeing who had decided to set up camp in restricted land.
Technoblade could feel his own body move, but his mind was still stuck in her room. Down the stairs he went, his limbs felt stiff, his shoulders heavy and his mind a million miles away. But no one would take his forest, no matter the fight that came from it.
Techno left his own, grabbing Carl and immediately hopping onto his back headed towards where Philza had seen the smoke. Even without a compass the man knew his own land and more without even a blink of the eye.
The galloping of Carls hooves against the snow filled ground was all that could be heard, yet Technos mind could only think of Y/N where she had gone in all this time. He had let her go physically but mentally she had left a burn that scorched his very soul.
Suddenly Techno pulled Carls reigns harshly, there is no one who would be brave enough to stay here...
Except....
His heart started to race before whipping the reigns rapidly, he kept making Carl run faster, the sun now completely set, the forest getting denser by the second, there was a chance, she could be alive.
Y/N could be alive, he could see her again, anything, anyway, he would make it different he would promise to be different.
The thoughts came to a sudden halt when Carl had tripped over a stump that was not dodged by his rider. Technoblade was flung off his horse and into the snow, catching his breath he realizes that Carl had begun running back home after being startled.
Cursing under his breath he begins to run.
The wind biting at his lungs.
His hair a mess.
His legs were burning.
But he ran.
And he knew exactly where that smoke had to have come from.
Running.
Running..
Running...
Running....
He saw it.
His cabin when he decided he had had enough of the wars and conflict.
He practically tripped over his own hooves before he was almost at the clearing just before the cabin.
He looked to where the window was.
A shadow... he couldn't make it out entirely.
But blinking rapidly and trying to swallow the saliva that he lacked in his own mouth.
Her hair... he could make out the silhouette of her hair, he would know it anywhere.
Her would know her anywhere.
She had taken from him what he cannot get back.
You.
He had to do whatever he need to get you back.
Y/N, what Technoblade would not do to just hold again.
Andrew, Y/N lets out a sigh of relief, it wasn't Carl, so the sword carving had to have been just a coincidence. Smiling she runs her hand over the stable walls. She thought that maybe one day she could have a horse of her own. The thought was not too troubling but she continued back to her cabin looking at the desks carving.
She had decided that leaving her own mark would be appropriate, she decided that todays goal would be to find a suitable stone to break into a makeshift dagger to add her own carving. Returning into her new found home she puts on her cloak, still brimming with the scent of Technoblades smell. The scent was bittersweet, having her stand in the lonely cabin had her rethinking the last question he had ever asked her.
Was her goal to still escape? The captivity seemed to have been getting better, would he have started to....
She smacks her cheeks roughly before grabbing her sword and swinging the door open harshly, her haste in repairing the ceiling and making sure the cabin had not previously belonged to Techno she finally walks to the back searching the ground for any rocks, she spots a wood bed.
A wood bed, she digs her hand into the snow a bit more to reveal it was indeed a flower bed for a garden. A small green sprout against the odds of the harsh winter giving her hopes digging into the soil. Potatoes! She could have almost eaten raw right there but instead she gathers only a few and sets them on the window sill of the home and continued walking.
The days were getting even colder and she knew she would have to find a sheep for better clothes or even just an extra blanket but that would need shears. Thinking on it now she was not very prepared to endure being alone.
She thinks back to the three days Technoblade was gone getting her clothes, he didn't even know her size but made sure she wasn't wearing the same thing everyday. Even though it felt like he owned a hundred of the same exact outfit he cared enough to make sure she had multiple.
Biting her lower lip she plays in her head if she could come back but with more freedom, but even that thought makes her laugh to herself at how insane that sounds. Finally she spots a rock particularly sharp and jumps for joy grabbing it. It was jagged and it probably would cut her if she wasn't careful, tucking it away in her pocket she adjusts she turtleneck to cover her mouth and continues walking.
She would need to make a basket but almost no plants were still alive in the cold, keeping her head high and hopes high but expectations moderate, she continues for maybe another few minutes.
Black.
Heart pounding.
Feather.
Black feathers.
She reaches to the ground and grabs one hastily, looking around frantically, the snow hadn't covered them yet. Could it be Philza? Did Techno send him out to find her? The smile makes its way onto her face before she even realizes it has.
"Philza?!?" She shouts and grips the feather tightly in her hand. She begins looking to the sky, anything any sign, he could help her get supplies.
Wait.
If Philza knows where she is, wouldn't he tell Techno and she could be dragged back to his home? The thought brings burning feeling in her chest, and a mixture of butterflies in her stomach and a sickening feeling.
Shaking off the feeling she keeps the feather in her hand and returns to her cabin, setting it gently down on the desk and grabbing her potatoes. She truly did not think this through, she has no fire, no water, nothing. But some potatoes and... she looks to her satchel and pulls out the bread Techno left her with once again.
She holds it to her mouth eyes waters as she grips the clothe, this can't be happening.
She wasn't supposed to let this happen.
She can't change what happened, she doesn't know how to return, what are the odds he finds her, will she starve in the snow?
She was so aware of her own body, every chill sent through her bones, the knots in her hair, the growl of her stomach, her shoes being too tight, her turtleneck feeling like it was choking the truth from her very own thoughts, her fingertips so cold she could write in the air and snowflakes would spell out her own thoughts before she could admit, the guilt of knowing what is true in her heart....
The guilt, the bitter ever consuming guilt, she squeezes her eyes shut, her breathing heavy, her head full, she could be drowning, she is drowning, she gasps for air and feels her chest tighten as if 'he' was squeezing the very truth from her....
The guilt of knowing...
She had fallen for her captor, and she didn't know how long she could avoid these feelings.
~To Technoblade~
He had stayed inside her room, in the darkness of her room, his farm left unattended, he had not eaten or changed his clothes. The brute of a piglin was moved to a neediness he had never experienced. His teeth gritted and finally... the first tear fell.
He cried for only a moment, quiet tears down his face of how different he could have gone about having her here. How could he get her back? He knows he doesn't deserve to have her back, he had become a true monster and chest heaves with heavier and heavier guilt but nothing could prepare him for his thoughts replaying that last morning they spent together.
She never flinched, she didn't move away before he woke up, he couldn't tell where his delusions started and the truth ended but he knew that he would never feel so strongly for another person in his life. He couldn't have known, he couldn't have, he only tolerates Philza, he had thought he was incapable of feeling this way.
He grips her sheets and brings it to his face before raising from the bed, realizing being in it any longer would have her scent disappear faster, his knees buckle holding her blanket to his face smelling her so deeply. His mouth open his eyes blown wide, a cry of no other unwillingly emits from his chest and forces his jaw shut and can't bring himself to cry further over a problem he had caused.
In his spiral of pity and self worth crushing he does not even hear his front door open and carefully the room be opened up. The light from the house catching his attention and he comes face to face with Philza, "Tech..."
Philzas mouth is gaped and his eyes quiver his usual demeanor fading to concern, but before he could make a step further Techno gnashes his teeth towards him, "LEAVE." Was all Techno could say before Phil closed the door.
Philza makes his way down the stairs and is instantly hit with the weight of what he was feeling, he knew their friendship was more one sided than he wants to admit. But to know a mere mortal could move Thee Technoblade, The Blade, The man who has slaughter hundreds...
He leaves out the front door spreading his wings as wide as they could and propelled himself into the air.
This couldn't be left this way, no matter how long it took, his wings would carry him through the air, the skies, and everywhere in between.
Because a man of his heart could not live with this continuing.
Its been a week, Philza is sat at his own desk in his cabin, scribbling over a map he had started when he got home from his first search from attempting to find Y/N. Technoblade had become a state of disrepair, and Philza knew only one person could help him. Even if she only returned to help him is all he needed. Philza couldn't bear how his friend looked, even unable to yell and scream at him to leave.
Philza had began having to feed him as he laid on the floor of Y/Ns old room. He refused to let go of her blanket, his heart broke each time he went to feed Techno. Placing the map into his robe pockets, he finally had one last area to check. East.
He grabbed his compass and found the direction before spreading his now well worn wings, he would have to push through the over flying and fix this, grindings his teeth, he had to fix this.
There was no other choice but to fix this before either of them died from starvation, the thought had Philza halt in his flight.
Starving.
Food.
Water.
Warmth.
Y/N had not a single one.
Philza feels sick to his stomach and he has to land abruptly and hits a tree on his way down. Had he been to late? Would he find a corpse in her wake? He drops to his knees the thoughts dizzying. He had never even thought of it, could he even present her body to him?
No, no she has survived through worse he is sure of it. He rubs his wing that had decided to collide with a damned tree and flexes them, works well enough for now.