didn’t even mean to log into this blog but looking at it is crazy because things have changed so much since i posted these things and i’m genuinely not the same person anymore
i want to go back and hug my younger self and tell them how much better it’s gonna get, some of the shit i used to post on here makes me want to cry, i’m worth so much more than what i thought when i was 19 or 20
the wildest thing is that i’m really not in a good spot right now at all, i just ended a relationship of two years (as in... we were living together and everything) and my heart is aching constantly, but even the fact that i was able to be in that relationship and be relatively healthy for so long was so far out of the realm of possibility for me once
i felt this shit so strongly once and things got so much better, i’m more confident, i’m not terrified of everyone, i’ve got a job and i’ve had others before this one, even ones that i NEVER would have thought myself capable of at all, i’m capable of being independent and handling my own difficult problems without breaking down or becoming suicidal every time
some of these posts are still getting notes after years and i just wanna say if you follow this blog still and relate to the posts, PLEASE don’t give up on yourself, i know it sounds ridiculous and cliche but things ARE able to be better and if i could make it out of here there is no way you can’t either
