Sometimes I struggle with life and reality.

Love is him pretending he got you unsweet tea just to mess with you.

I like sports, I like country, I also like rap, rock and a lot of other music. I like to stay up all night, and sleep and cuddle all day. I want to go on adventures at 3 in the morning. I'll stay up till god knows when helping you with your problems. I live reading a book on a stormy day curled in my favorite sweater. I'll text you 20 times in a row to let you know I'm thinking about you. I'll drop everything to see you, and make sure you are okay. I will be excessively nerdy. You will have to listen to my rants about random things. I love my pets and I love my family. I'm not going to make any sense sometimes. I'm going to want to draw on you,and put makeup on you. I get really whiny and emotional sometimes. Green tea with honey iced down is my favorite thing to drink. Sometimes I just get mad at life, just hold me and tell me its okay. Because I'm sick of being alone. I'm tired of not having anyone to call. I want to have someone to send my funny pictures to. I want someone to call when something happens. I want someone to ask me how my day was. I want someone to dance to my favorite song with. I want someone who will laugh and smile when I steal their shirt and wear it to bed. I want someone who will take pictures of me while I'm sleeping and brush the curls off my face. I want someone who knows what's wrong without be saying a word. I want someone who just picks me up and carries me when I get tired. I want someone who will make me feel like a whole person even though so much of me is broken. I want someone I can trust. I want someone that will pick up at 4 a.m when I've had a bad dream. I want someone who doesn't whine about how long my makeup takes, but instead sits with me and talks to me through it and says " let me help" joking around. I want someone who will join in in my antics. I want someone who will find me beautiful all done up, and just woke up. I want someone I can tell "I just started my period" and they show up with chocolate and my favorite snacks. I want someone to take me on a fancy date, and then ruin my lipstick as soon as we get home. I want someone I can feel comfortable with. I want someone who will care about me on my best and worst days. I want someone who won't push me away when things get hard. I want someone who will love me.

I refuse to compromise who I am as a person for anyone. I am loud, yet reserved. I am weird, I will and won't act like a lady. I will respect what you ask of me, but if it fundamentally chances who I am, you get 1 response: go fuck yourself.

I feel so lost. Why do you do when your heart gets ripped out? What do you do when you can take comfort in no one because you are supposed to be the strong one and have no problems? I'm crumbling and having to hold my own dustpan. I want to run into someone's arms and fall apart. I want to scream and cry and say how I truly feel and have them say its okay. I had hoped you could be that one, but darling, you are just as broken as I. I can fix your puzzle but I could never see you fixing mine, and I wouldn't ask you to anyways.

Promise to stand by my side, and I promise to help. I'm so tired of being alone.