(a marty/svech shipping primer)

now that you’ve reviewed the jordan martinook primer and the andrei svechnikov primer, let’s discuss why the combination thereof is such an excellent ship.

obviously the most important thing about this ship is their pregame ritual, in which jordan martinook screams svech’s name “like a dying witch who just realized she’s just been poisoned by Carolina’s young stud,” sometimes while erotically pinning svech against a wall (see also here or here).

would you like to see it in slow-mo? here is a gif where you can really see svech’s surprised and delighted expression. and here is a tenderly clumsy version where svech is trying to hug marty while marty is trying to scream at him and i want to fling myself into the sea.

please also note this video in which you can hear svech yelling “let’s go marty!” back at him. he pronounces marty’s name with two very distinct syllables and honestly death would be kinder to me.

as if the casual homoeroticism of the ritual was not enough to send me to my grave all on its own, it turns out to have actual thoughtful roots. throughout his career, marty has picked a teammate to do something with pregame. why did he pick andrei?

I was just kind of drawn to Svech, just because, he’s an 18-year-old kid that sounds like he’s about 35. He looks probably like he could be a Russian bodybuilder instead of a hockey player. He’s just such an interesting guy.

MARTY. you poor oblivious sweetheart. this is a CRUSH. you have a crush.

having fallen fast and hard, why does marty decide that the best course of action is to scream in his crush’s face while andrei squirms with embarrassment and delight?

Obviously I was trying to make him feel comfortable, ‘cause I know, even, I was a 23-year-old rookie and when you’re coming into it, it’s hard. You’re coming into to the NHL, it’s hard, you got 35-year-old guys, it’s hard. And I just wanted him to feel comfortable and him to not be scared to scream and yell and speak up, and that was the whole thing behind my, our, pregame ritual, was I just wanted him to be into it. And I feel like when you’re doing that you can loosen up and then the rest goes out the window, and I just wanted him to play hockey, because I know how everybody knows how good he is.  

hey fellas is it gay to press your buddy against a wall because you think he’s so great and you want him to feel comfortable being himself?

good times rollin’ on me

author: ferryboatpeak pairing: jordan martinook/andrei svechnikov word count: 48K summary: The cat doesn’t look like a demon at the moment. The cat looks smug, with her front paws propped daintily on Svech’s knee and her eyes slitted as Svech smooths his hand back over her head. To be fair, Jordan might have the same expression if he was in the cat’s position. Jordan has an empty house, a cat that hates him, and a beer league team without enough players. Andrei could be the solution.

That should be me, holding your hand