❣ Chile in a Photography ❣
almost home
NASA
EXPECTATIONS
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Jules of Nature
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occasionally subtle
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blake kathryn
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trying on a metaphor
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Discoholic 🪩
I'd rather be in outer space 🛸
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@1stnamelastnameyearofbirth
"There's also two reasons why your underwear's feeling a little warm and sticky all of a sudden..."
"He he... yep... same reasons!"
"Anyway... you go clean yourself up, and have a nice day."
Huh. Thought this one got buried for good.
But more Hunny is always welcome here.
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Other source for that recent cap.
Remember Donatello from TMNT? This is him now.
Feel old yet?
Source for that last cap.
"Hey, cutie... ugh... don't you just hate when it gets so hot and your underwear gets all sticky...? He he... that's why I don't wear any!"
Emily got a real kick out of setting boys off in their shorts in summer.
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"Well howdy there. You must be the new boy. Hooweeh... good lookin' fella, ain't cha? Must be my lucky day... Yours too, Hon... 'cause I'm gonna be your trainer here..."
"Name's Em... pleasure to make your acquaintance. He he... lookin' a little nervous there, buddy. Don't let the teeth scare ya, I don't bite... 'less you ask nice!"
"How 'bout you take a seat over there... and let ol' Em take you for a test ride, Handsome. This your first time...? He he... well... don't you worry your pretty little head. It ain't my first rodeo; been ridin' a few years now. I'll have you creamin' those jeans in no time!"
"Mmmm... see your little friend there knows what's up. He he... ready to go right now. Just you hold on there a minute, cutie pie, I'll get to you soon enough."
"Heh... do love me a virgin boy... gotta be careful with 'em, though. Come on a too strong... might spook 'em and then, BAM! Shoot 'emselves in the pants, 'fore I can even get saddled up..."
"Ohhhhhhhh!"
"Oh...! Uhh... Yup... just like that! He he... welcome to the Stud Farm, Sugar!"
"Mmm... can't beat the feelin' of breakin' in the new boys. Oooohhhh... I could just eat you up! Or maybe just drink you. Ha ha... Guess I should start the tour with the showers, and the laundry room. You'll get familiar with them real fast, Honey, believe me!"
It's The Humidity...
"Ahem...! Eyes up here, dude!" Jade teased Mikey.
"So... sorry..." he spluttered an apology. "I wasn't trying to... I mean... you're hot... I mean... it's hot... I just... I didn't mean to... stare..."
Jade sniggered a little. She knew he wouldn't be able to help looking at her tits, no matter what she was wearing. But it was fun to play with him, and see his reaction.
"Hot...? Yeah... no kidding... why'd you think I'm dressed like this? Sweatin' my tits off here... Like, literally... I swear I've gone down a cup size. This top definitely felt tighter an hour ago."
Despite her claims, her top still looked to be pretty full. But she thought it was funny to bring his attention back to them, having just told him not to stare.
She sighed. "Maybe I'm being harsh on you boys... climate change and all... don't know how much longer all this natural beauty's gonna be around. Gotta appreciate it while you can, huh?" she raised an eyebrow and smirked, seeing Mikey snap back for a second, after getting a little too drawn in.
"Oh... yeah..." he agreed, before recoiling a little at how pervy it sounded. "I mean... uh..." he spluttered.
Jade just giggled at his reaction. It was so easy for her to wind him up.
"Urgh... and it's the humidity!" she groaned. "Feelin' all gross and sticky all the time..." she shook her head, "and, like... it feels gross for me, yeah, but, my boobs get sweaty... I know they look amazing!"
"I mean... I can't help it! Like guys aren't staring down my top enough, then I' gotta wear less to keep cool, and now they're all wet and shiny!" Her tits jiggled as she gestured, further emphasising her point.
She could tell Mikey in complete agreement with her, as he stared, glassy eyed at her cleavage. She smirked, seeing his brain was so lost, he wasn't even conscious enough to try and cover the pop-tent in his shorts.
"Probably just thinking about how slippery they'd be..." her smirk widened, as Mikey subconsciously nodded along.
"Just... havin' a lil' slip 'n' slide between 'em..." she purred softly. "That'd feel pretty good, huh...? Just sliding back and forth... back and forth... squeezed in between them... until..."
Mikey's eyes widened. His cock already felt like it was there, and did what it would do there. "OH! FU..." he grabbed himself, too late to stop it.
Jade giggled as she saw the wet spot on his shorts. Apparently being uncomfortable and sticky wasn't just going to be her problem today.
"Ohhh... not again....!" Mikey whined, which only amused her further.
"Miiikeeeyy...? You're not bothering my friends again, are you...?" Rachel called from the kitchen.
He pleadingly looked at Jade. She smirked wickedly, but decided to cut him a break.
"OK... that's kinda on me... you get outta here... clean up..." she dismissed him. "Maybe a cold shower...?" she giggled.
She called back to Rachel. "Nah... he was just sayin' Hi. Catch ya later Mikey..." she waved cheekily, as he scurried away in shame.
"Phew... hot as balls today, huh...?" Rachel sighed as she walked in. "Here, you go..." she handed Jade a can of Diet Coke. "Maybe hold it between your tits... cool 'em off a little!" she laughed raucously.
"Thanks, babe..." Jade smiled, before placing the cold metal against her forehead first, then tracing it down across her chest then wedging between her tits and sighing. "Oh... that's so nice..." she moaned.
Rachel smirked. "Mmm... maybe try a little more here too..." She rubbed her own can against her nipple, sniggering. "Ha ha... shoulda told Mikey to stick around. Bet he'd fuckin' jizz his shorts if he saw you do that..." She scoffed, "surprised he didn't anyway... must be losing your touch, girl!"
Jade smirked, knowing, but then shook her head and shrugged. "Must be the weather. Heat must be throwing me off my game."
"Aww... not so hot when you're so hot...?" Rachel teased.
"Yeah... gotta cool off. Maybe hop in the shower, real quick... you don't mind, do you...?"
Rachel shrugged. "Sure... knock yourself out..." she sniggered. "Or maybe just go out back and I spray you with the hose!"
"Ha! Maybe later... if it gets any hotter!" Jade laughed. "Could ask Mikey to help. You and me... have a little Wet T-Shirt contest...?" She giggled, "unless you're afraid you'd loose..."
"Hey! Don't get cocky... I'm no slouch at Wet T..." Rachel smirked at the challenge. "Besides... you and me...? Guarantee Mikey's gonna be the one losing it!"
"He he... and yet... he'd finish first!" Jade giggled as she spang up to head for the bathroom. "If I see him... I'll run it by him..."
"Maybe wait 'til after your shower..." Rachel called after her. "He'll probably need one as soon as mention it!"
As Mikey was laying out a towel in the bathroom, Jade snuck up and hugged him from behind. "Hey... how about we save a little water...?" she whispered in his ear, "and then... you can help me waste a little of it too!"
This variant of the Goldentail / Bastard Moray is known as the Banana Eel due to its colouration and markings resembling a ripe banana.
(source)
sorry the what? the what moray
scientist: let’s call you the… goldentail
banana eel: [bites scientist]
scientist: Okay motherfucker, new idea:
Every time this post comes around I’m too busy to tell this story so I’m gonna do it now: when I learned to scuba dive, there was a dude in my dive group named Dumbass Dave who was always being relentlessly roasted by his buddies because when they went to the Great Barrier Reef he brought a baggie of hard boiled egg down with him because he wanted to find a moray eel and feed it and pet it
Well he found a moray and attempted to hand feed it, and it snapped up the egg and bit the shit out of his right hand in the process and the dive had to be halted so the blood wouldn’t attract sharks. But was this enough punishment for Dumbass Dave? No it was not, because he had a Plan
Dumbass Dave’s plan turned out to be a chainmail glove. Where he obtained it has been lost to time, but he put it on his right, injured hand and down they went, whereupon Dave found himself another moray and tried to feed it some hardboiled egg
With his left hand
And yes it did bite the shit out of him and they did have to cancel the dive, again
So I guess the moral of that story is maybe eels aren’t bastards, maybe they just meet a lot of people like Dave
I reminded my scuba instructor of this story and he wanted me to amend the post to let everyone know that it was the same eel who bit Dumbass Dave both times
What's the name of this eel...?
Goldentail.
Right, I'm never gonna remember that. Change it to Bastard...
The pay's not great, but the benefits include health insurance, plus dental coverage, and laundry services. Although to get the laundry services, you'll also have to opt-in on sexual harassment...
🎶Raaaspberry bidet.🎶
🎶she never just wiped, 'cause this would clean it much more🎶
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French people when you call it bukake and not "nut a la visage" and shibari instead of "corde attacher l'submissive"
Pisse? In le pantalons???
Mon tabarnak j'vais te décâlisser la yeule, câlice!
Jus d'homme...?
Dans mon pantalons?
(Le Bars)
We're not going to kink shame anyone, but no foreign words, s'il vous plaît.
"Fine lookin' pistol you're packin' there, cowboy. Reckon a girl could get herself in all sorts o' trouble, messin' 'round with that thang..."
"Hmmm... if you'll pardon me for sayin' though... looks mighty twitchy, if ya ask me. Wouldn't be 'bout ta draw your weapon on a lady now... would ya, mister? Not real friendly of ya."
"Gotta warn ya... Mama didn' raise no wallflower. Ask any boy 'round these parts 'bout Buttercup, an' they'll tell ya. This lil lady don't back down."
"Couple o' big ol' cannons right here. An' hoo boy... lemme tell ya. Don't matter if you a choirboy, or the baddest gunslinger around... I put the big guns in they're faces... all of 'em wind up runnin' home to Momma, for a change o' britches."
"Ohhhh... damn, Sugar... He he... I was just foolin' around, but... you sure were quick on the draw there... He he... maybe I shoud say, quick... in your drawers! Ha ha ha!"
"Mah Lawd... would ya look at that! Guess it wasn't a pistol after all. Must've emptied both barrels, if you catch my drift... he he... Whew... enough to make even a fine lady like m'self blush!"
"You take care now, Stranger. A few saloons in town're home to some... less reputable... ladies than myself. Handsome fella like you... hate to think, they might be lookin' to have their way with ya!"
"Lemme know if you wanna rematch before you leave town. Like I say, the name's Buttercup, friends call me, B-Cup... he he... not so much these days, mind you! But, Honey, you can call me, anytime!"
congratulations piracy
Ad agency: Please don't steal the King's potatoes, no matter how easy it is.
Regular people: Wait, the King has easily stolen potatoes? How do I get in on this?
Internet users who have been stealing potatoes for years: We made a machine that picks so many potatoes and also that machine is free. Enjoy!
Ad agency: you wouldn't steal a movie?
10 year old me with 0 income and no movie: YOU CAN STEAL MOVIES????
[Image ID: Headline from IFLScience reading: "You Wouldn't Steal a Movie" Advert May Have Led To More People Stealing Movies /End ID]
Fun fact! Both the music and the font in that ad were incorrectly sourced and did not provide compensation to the creators
Kiss, spank or bite??🥰
There are no wrong answers.
"Ha ha ha... got him! Can't beat that look, first time a guy jizzes in his pants! Hashtag preemie. Hashtag virgin."
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Stepbrother Test: Guess Who's Cumming to Breakfast?
"Morning, Mikey. Sleep well...?" Rachel smirked, looking down at his crotch. "PJ's survived OK...? He he... look at you, not having accidents, like you're a big boy now... Ha ha ha ha!"
Michael looked down, turning a little red in the face. She couldn't just leave him alone, could she?
"Aww... you are so cute when you're angry..." she giggled. "Hard to believe you're still single. I hear girls are into sensitive guys these days. Maybe I need to set you up with one of my friends!"
"I'm not going out with any of your friends!" he protested. He didn't want to think about how a date with any of them would end, besides him having to get home with a wad of cum soaked into his boxers.
Rachel gasped in mock outrage. "Mikey! My friends are super nice! You'd be lucky to go out with any of them!"
"Oh! Is Mikey here...?" A voice called from upstairs.
"He sure is!" Rachel called up. "Come down an' say hi!" She turned back to her embattled stepbrother. "See... ran into an old friend last night, she crashed here, and she's totally stoked to see you. Like I said, super nice!"
"Heeeeyyyy... Mikey!" Cece giggled as she giddily bounded down the stairs.
"Oh..." Michael's jaw dropped as he recognised her. As her tits bounced freely, the tiny, loose top doing almost nothing to tame them. Time seemed to slow down.
As she stopped in front of him, she couldn't resist adding a little extra bounce in her step.
Before he could even try to cover himself, he was creaming his PJ's, much to the amusement of the girls.
"Oooohhh..." Cece giggled. "And I thought I was excited to see you!" she smirked. "More than mutual, I see!"
"Hey, I'm starving, by the way. You wanna show me where everythin' is..?" She took his hand and dragged him with her, despite is legs still being jelly after he just came.
"Mmmm... you haven't changed at bit, huh, cutie?" she giggled. "Can't wait to catch up with you. Big Sis here's been playing all coy with me... but I bet you've got a few stories I'd like to hear...?"
Michael groaned. This was going to be a long breakfast.
Heard tumblr love big butts🤭
"You weren't kidding! I mean... being an ass man's one thing. Blowing your load just from seeing it's another. You'd better give it a kiss at least, then maybe I'll let you clean yourself up, and I'll try to keep this between us."
Betty struggled to keep a straight face. As if he was the first guy to cream his boxers over her ass. Oh, how her friends would laugh when she told them that.
