A

I hope you’re doing well ! I can’t wait till be able to experience life as you are now having learned all of this and accomplished what everyone is striving for!

My question is regarding learning more about the nature of what I am. Rupert Spira mentioned that it’s not enough to know that one is awareness. He emphasizes the importance of exploring the nature of it. Ex. Knowing it’s infinite, knowing the world is in it or a modulation of it. So my question is what’s the best way to figure this out. My mind cannot know of awareness so is asking questions about the nature of it really beneficial ? The next option would be experiencing it/being it. I know that I’m it all the time but when I try to go deeper and get to a place where it’s just awareness, I find that thoughts/perceptions/sensations are never ending and I want to experience it without these things, like we do in sleep.

Regarding sleep, if it’s our true nature with the absence of objective things, why doesn’t sleep bring us closer to understanding awareness if we experience it daily.

Is it because we don’t know the context of what it actually means? - if this makes sense

Thank you, I appreciate your time 💗

hi love! :] 🩵 longgg post ahead woweee i apologise.

in response to the first part of your ask:

i can only extrapolate based on the limited context, but i imagine rupert spira was emphasising the importance of not just simply knowing that what i call "me" or "i" (the person) is unreal, but that the entirety of the dream and everything in it is unreal too. you are not just an illusory form/projection of Awareness interacting with a real, separate, immovable world. the whole of the world and all of its contents, everything that is imaginable and conceivable, all physical and mental activity is nothing but a form of Awareness taking place within Awareness. the reason Awareness is infinite is because it is boundless. and time is a boundary. if Awareness is subject to time i.e. if it has a beginning/end, tell me what could possibly come before/after it? and notice that whatever answer you can offer is an answer produced by the mind, meaning it is yet another form of Awareness in and of itself. whatever you imagine could take place before/after (aka ‘outside of’) Awareness, requires Awareness in order to imagine it (i.e. in order for it to exist). therefore, Awareness inherently surpasses all limits and bounds. it is all-pervading and all-powerful.

as for how i suggest you come to this understanding, simply self realise. everything else will take care of itself. there are zero questions or doubts left when knowing is ultimate. reality becomes self obvious. simply keep remembering that nothing you are conscious of can be you …so what are you? what is the single unchanging element of all changing phenomena? what remains when all else goes?…

continually keep in mind the absolute and all-encompassing nature of Awareness. i have people all the time tell me "i know i’m Self, but …" and then they go on to spiral about a particular "problem" or circumstance. if you truly knew, you’d treat everything with the calm indifference that you do your dreams. there’d be no ifs or buts or maybes. if you understand that this thing/person/event/thought is unreal, why would that one be any different? if you know this thought is illusion, why is that thought somehow real? if you know that ideas are unreal and meaningless, why do they still trigger you? why do you still spiral? why do you fight to change/get rid of/affirm against what you see? because the knowing is incomplete and unsustained, that’s why. we remember our true nature for a little, and then something happens that feels very serious and scary and we forget again. we go back to believing in the world. the solution is just to keep at this ‘practice’ until it’s permanent, until you remember all of the time. then the need for any practice or remembering is over. you are just Being, forever, regardless of whatever costume (character) You playfully put on.

i know you said you want to go deeper beyond thoughts, but thoughts won’t stop for as long as you’re wanting or willing them to. the good news is, that’s fine! thoughts exist because You exist first. they are an indication of Awareness, not a hindrance of it. the only reason you can know of them in the first place is because you are. use them as an opportunity to remember your true Being instead of seeing them as a problem to overcome. let them be, watch them the way you’d watch bustling traffic from your bedroom window; sometimes it’s loud and crowded, sometimes it’s quiet and empty, but either way You stand apart from it. observe. the noise will fall away on its own i assure you.

as for sleep:

this person talks about how sleep brought them closer to understanding awareness.

in deep dreamless sleep, personal consciousness vanishes. the world, the body, the mind, the sense of "i am" all cease to exist. the lack of sense objects leaves only pure, primordial Awareness (distinction explained here).

even in deep sleep, You (Awareness) are. that’s why you do not say "i ceased existing last night" even though the person technically did (and that’s because You are not the person, therefore You continue even when the person does not!!! think on that). now imagine this state of deep sleep, except without ever waking up. You would be no-body in no-thing forever, formless and shapeless and undivided. yet you cannot say You wouldn’t exist, because it is into this state that you (the character and world) submerges (falling asleep) and re-emerges (waking up) every day. there must be something (= Awareness) within which the world and person can dissolve and arise. so in short, You are the space/canvas for the entire universe. preeeetttttyyy cool right? : ))

but yes, for the vast majority of people, they awaken from sleep and immediately assume the identity of a person in the world. it appears very much that the world is already there upon awakening, and you are a mere victim of it. memories of the past are carried into every new moment, and it’s this apparent continuity/cause and effect within the dream which gives it its sense of reality. the illusion you have set up for yourself is a very convincing one. hence the advice to behave as if you were bodiless and mindless, spaceless and timeless, effectively embodying (mentally) the state of deep sleep.

this is why i recommend meditation, yes as often as possible, but especially before sleep and after waking. seek to extend this meditative state, in which you are allowing everything its being whilst remaining undisturbed and unattached, further and further into the day until you’re in it constantly, until you realise it is your natural way of being and the activities of the world can no longer bind you.

when i speak of meditation, i don’t mean you must force yourself to sit only in one place in a particular position with your eyes closed and total silence surrounding you. yes, it can help in the beginning to find somewhere private to sit peacefully, but you can very much meditate all of the time regardless of what the body is doing… essentially what this anon described here, in what is one of my favourite posts ever.

ramana maharshi has lots of interesting quotes about sleep that you can find simply by googling. here’s one:

nisargadatta maharaj also has a quote that’s only semi-related to sleep but i love it so much that i’m including it here anyways :p

Is it really truly just a matter of knowing thy Self and collapsing all these false concepts of lack and separation? I feel like I know these things, yet I find myself feeling confused at times….maybe I just need to recognize that anything from the mind is not me and leave it all alone? Sorry for this being all over the place! I really just wanted to send an ask before you’re gone 😘

"maybe I just need to recognize that anything from the mind is not me and leave it all alone?"

i couldn’t have put it more succinctly myself if i tried. you got it in one baby🌟

the confusion isn’t You, the feeling that you’re not there yet isn’t You.

but it’s truly ok that the confusion is there… let it be… it doesn’t last forever, and i promise with every fibre of my being that this long and arduous process you think you’re stuck in right now, you’ll come to look back on with nothing but unimaginable peace and love. where you once saw pain, you’ll soon see only perfection. 🩵

From Being_is_IT on Twitter:

https://x.com/Being_Is_IT/status/1762169629449867389

How can I more efficiently remember myself?

Thank you.

Emanuel

ANON I MUS: You have to learn the art of being aware of your own awareness, by becoming more meditative and mindful (watchful) in who you are, and everything you perceive. It is vital to make self-realization your highest goal in life (above everything else). You must become what you already are (by fully accepting your essential nature), as the unchanging, detached observer of every thought, experience and appearance that come and go. Tap into the deeper intelligence of your inner knowingness that is the core essence of your everyday experiences. Anything that appears and disappears is unstable and cannot be your real nature.

Train yourself to accept that you are the changeless fact of every experience; everything in this world is there for you (from you). Thoughts and appearances cannot even appear without your awareness of them. Awareness is not an object or particular experience, yet without it, no object or experience can be known.

The practice of self-inquiry is returning to the fact of what you are which is the silent, colour-less, time-less, description-less, boundary-less, story-less I AM prior to form (distinctions/this or that). This knowingness is so ordinary that it usually escapes the mind's attention because it is always present in every moment. You must bring your attention home to this Source that is the self-evident, undivided and complete (with no inside or outside); do not impart or immerse your sense of self into the hypnosis of appearances. The fact of this direct realization will prevent you from falling into delusion. The content of your experiences cannot change your unchanging being in anyway.

don’t get stuck on the past, you didn’t know any better then. you know better now.

and don’t plan for the future either. don’t plan for who you’re going to be after self realisation. be it now, have it all now.

don’t try to make it so. just settle on what you consider perfection and ALLOW IT TO BE. LET IT HAPPEN TO YOU. sophie said it best… fall victim to it (can’t find the post rn but i’ll link it when i do). do absolutely nothing to make it so, just allow the life of your dreams to LOVINGLY ATTACK YOU 💕💕💕💕💕💕

the only time we have is now. give up the past and the future. be it now. not in 5 minutes, not in the morning, not by christmas, not by new years. NOW.

why wait a month? it’s always now, there’s no future but in your imagination

"i can’t, i don’t know how—" SAYS WHOOO??? A THOUGHT??? SCOFF IN ITS FACE.

you are what you are now. what is there to wait for???

Most of you could answer your own questions if you would just ask yourselves where are all these fears coming from. From whom??? Whose are they??

Why do you think anything can happen against your will? Who is making you drop the positive beliefs? And if you drop them what's stopping you from reinstalling them again? Why are you so scared of losing the positive aspects of the material if you're the one producing them in the first place? Who or what is supposed to take them from you?

These are such 2+2 questions, what can possibly happen if the beliefs are dropped except from them losing the only reality they had, which was you. So what even if Vanessa goes, if she goes poof, so what? Make another. Make Vanessa 2.0. What are you scared of if YOU can't stop existing, no matter what?

If I had to boil it down as simply and as bluntly as I am capable, I would say the spiritual life is about becoming aware of the true abode of happiness—and then never leaving it. 

Happiness only comes from the place in which it is felt, which is within ourselves. Not from the objective phenomena such as people, circumstances, and material things that we perceive and experience. Nothing else can feel or experience happiness for you.

When you stray away from the spiritual path, it means you are seeking happiness in something outside the source of happiness itself. It means you aren’t entirely certain and clear on where happiness is felt and from where it is obtained. This is the Great Confusion that leads to much suffering—for yourself and for those around you.  

Because happiness is within, there is nothing to force. You need not renounce the things of your world. Attachment to and dependence on the external are only symptoms of that Great Confusion. To be free, you need only to remember the real source of happiness.

That’s all.

So, I feel weird in my situation.

I think a lot, like a lot, and whenever I have any thoughts about awareness I end up in a loop. " Thoughts are not real", "but the thoughts of thoughts not being real are not real either", "but all of the statements about awareness come from the mind", "if the they come from the mind, they are not real, because the mind is not real".

Whenever I try to think about who am I, the answer will come from the mind but the mind is not real, so there's nothing real.

Not my thoughts, not my body, not my mind, none of these are not real.

So what is REAL, ANY INTELLECTUAL MIND CAN ANSWER THAT. I mean seeking something won't make me happy

But beyond the life, the body, the mind, WHAT IS REAL?

How can I detach from my mind, THAT'S THE ONLY THING I WANT TO KNOW.

Ayayayay sounds like you're falling back into your manifestation habits 🤯 instead now you're trying to convince Vanessa that something is unreal...

You don't have to convince anyone of anything. Thoughts will keep on coming for a while, just now you know they have nothing to do with you. Doesn't matter what the thought is, leave it alone, ignore it BUT not by force of will, just indifference. We've established you aren't the ego, alright? Thoughts, right now, are from the ego. You don't need to convince yourself they're unreal, just dismiss them as not yours. They will disappear more and more through your newfound indifference, then their physical counterparts will, too.

Detachment is by doubt and indifference. First you start doubting "the facts", then you become indifferent to the facts, lastly there are no facts anymore and you can establish your own.

this from nisargadatta fits perfectly here i was itching to use it

You only feel the need to "right your thoughts" when you identify yourself with an idea. Pay them no attention. Don't fight them. Just do nothing about them, let them be, whatever they are. Your very fighting them gives them life. Just disregard. Look through. Remember to remember: 'whatever happens — happens because I am'. All reminds you that you are. Take full advantage of the fact that to experience you must be. That all depends on you. You need not stop thinking. Just cease being interested. It is disinterestedness that liberates. Don't hold on, that is all. Give up your addictions. There is nothing else to give up. You need not correct yourself — only set right your idea of yourself. Learn to separate yourself from the image and the mirror, keep on remembering: I am neither the mind nor its ideas: do it patiently and with conviction and you will surely come to the direct vision of yourself as the source of being — knowing — loving, eternal, all-embracing all-pervading. You are the infinite focused in a body. Now you see the body only. Try earnestly and you will come to see the infinite only.

“Trace your misunderstandings and abandon them, that is all. There is nothing to seek or find, for there is nothing lost. Relax and watch the “I am.” Reality is just behind it. Keep quiet, keep silent; it will emerge or, rather, it will take you in.”

“Freedom means letting go. People just do not care to let go of everything. They do not know that the finite is the price of the infinite, as death is the price of immortality. Spiritual maturity lies in the readiness to let go of everything. The giving up is the first step. But the real giving up is in realizing that there is nothing to give up, for nothing is your own.”

"In order to see, you have to stop being in the middle of the picture." - Sri Aurobindo

"Right now, before imagining yourself into the center of your storyline, can you notice what is already seeing, listening, sensing? Does perception itself require a person at point A viewing an outside world at point B? Isn't it rather that consciousness is the screen on which the movie plays? It holds but never possesses concepts and sensations which come and go like passing scenes. Without needing to grasp or reject anything.    Rest here and now, not as an imaginary someone looking out at reality, but as capacity for life's unfolding. Ask sincerely, What changes when I stop presuming existence needs a “me” at the center? Who looks through the eyes seeing these words? What knows without needing past and future for identity?"

What we call 'happiness', I think it's much better stated as freedom.

"To be free, you have to know two things - what you're to be free from, and what keeps you bound." (4dbarbie)

Freedom is from something, and that something is the person you imagine yourself to be.

Now, a transcript from Lester:

What we truly want is freedom from everything and freedom in everything. Freedom to do or not to do.

But this freedom that we're looking for is so different from what we think it is, that very few of us really go all out for it.

This freedom, which is total, is not in a confined state of being a physical body, it is the state of pure and only being. It's the 'I'-ness of us, the 'IS'-ness of us, the 'I AM'-ness of us, but it is not I am something. It's not the thought 'I am a body', but just the am-ness, and That alone. Everything you add onto that is a mental concept.

We concocted this whole universe and forgot that we have done it. Then we say, it is real, it is separate from me. What it really is, is a picture in our mind. The only place that you'll see this world, is in your mind. Put your mind to sleep, no more world.

Go into that realm which is just behind the mind, which is infinite, which is beingness. Then you'll wake up from this dream and there is never a world again, but YOU are. Everyone, all life is seeking to return to that state of just pure beingness.

So how do we get to this ultimate state of freedom? Get rid of the tendency to identify yourself with this mental picture. Drop it, and it's done. The dropping is easy if we do it, and impossible if we don't.