PROLOGUE

Mingi still remembers the first time he picked up a guitar, the first time he truly felt alive. He was around fourteen years old at the time, known for being quite short for his age back in that day, when he walked into a music store. The one place where everything would change.

His older brother hadn’t been home for a while, leaving the west coast in order to make history. It had been pretty much a whole year since the eldest Song had visited Los Angeles and the humble house their mother kept alive. Mina Kim, the matriarch of the household that still kept the name of her divorced husband, fought day and night, blood sweat and tears to make her boys the happiest they could ever dream of be. . .and Mingi, well, he was a massive dreamer.

And that was part of the reason Mingi and Minsoo ended up in that music store looking at various guitars. Still, the youngest felt bad for dragging his brother all the way to a random store outside their neighbourhood, felt awful knowing he would be associated with one of the members of the NHL All-Rookie Team and a former prospect drafted third in the prior year. The short one didn’t want people to know they were brothers, after all, Minsoo was handsome, the perfect guy and well, a jock. . .and Mingi, he was just the short, weird and face full of acne kid. Minsoo deserved a way better brother, the youngest always thought.

Mingi knew perfectly well the reason they were at the store. He knew what day was marked in the calendar: June 17th. The day the divorce between their parents had finally come to an end. The day, the split he caused, had become official. Adults kept telling him that it wasn't his fault, that people fall out of love and that does not always mean forever. However, Mingi blamed himself. He saw in his father’s eyes, saw the way he was a disappointment. Heard his name numerous times during the arguments the older ones were having. Saw his mother cry. Felt her hugs. Heard all of the: “it’s okay, love. you’re okay.”

But he never knew what she was protecting him from. Until one day. . .

The day he left. His love. His soulmate.

I

“No! Oh my God, Yunho. . .” Mingi exclaimed, already regretting the idea of saying yes to his best friend. “I’m not going to dance. Forget it.”

The youngest by a few months kept his stance. He was soon to turn twenty-one, not even two months left for his birthday and here he stood, listening to his best friend pleading for him to be his companion at a dance class. A really specific dance class: the one Yunho taught. The one where all the students were not only learning, but also ogling their teacher. And here he was, trying to convince the taller one he was not going to go.

Mingi no longer was the short, weird kid with a face full of acne. Now, he was twenty years old and with looks that could kill. The short, almost buzzcut, pink hair being his trademark, after all, he was known as the “pink guy from H.A.L.A”. The confidence he carried with all his chest, that made the fans love him, some even more than their vocalist. Which is rare, he always knew fans to be obsessed with the voice who carried the band. . .and usually, that voice belongs to the hot one. And Mingi, he was just Mingi. The once unlovable child. The one who broke his parents marriage.

Once again, the calendar marked that dreadful day. Yunho knew that, of course he knew. And Mingi, he knew that was the reason for being almost forced to take a dumb dance class taught by his best friend. The one who knew him and understood him better than anyone in the world. His soulmate.

And maybe, that was the reason he could not say no. The reason he was already being pushed through the dance studio door.

But soon, he became a reason too.

The reason everyone stared at.

He could feel the stares, hear the mumbling. They were talking shit about him, about his looks, his lanky features and his crazy hair. He knew. He knew they were. They had to be badmouthing him, just like Jaebum had done all those years. Nonetheless, he was thankful they were just talking behind his back, at least, they were not throwing punches at him just because of his existence. . .even though he knew, he would stand there and take them. But Yunho didn’t. He just knew about the verbal bullying, not the physical one. Not the reason he was used to getting beaten up. Not the holidays with his father.

“Hey, you good?” A voice took him out of his thoughts. Yunho, was the voice. The calm in the middle of a storm. The anchor in the middle of the youngest’s mind.

“Don’t worry ‘bout it.” He smiled, not the perfect one or the real one. Just a small smile that told Yunho not to press, even though the man could see him not being alright. “Let’s go, you have a class to teach!!”

Mingi was already running away in the direction of the room he knew Yunho always claimed, but still mumbled: “and my ass to humiliate.”

And between all the spins, the counts and the technical terms he never remembered. He smiled. Truly, this time.

“Tú me enseñaste a querer. Me enseñaste a bailar.”

II

“Why would he leave us? It just doesn't make any sense.”

Mingi mumbled while pacing around in circles. It was the first practice in over a week, the first after he left, the first without Yunho. It was the first time in forever, the two of them weren't doing something together. The first time, Yunho was not there to protect him…but yet, he was standing right beside the guy who always made Mingi's life feel worthless, even more than his own father had made.

In the young boy's mind, at least his father left a mark willingly to be seen by others. Left a mark and claimed it as a love, not as a punishment. But then, Jaebum came and his father was no longer around. The marks stopped being physical, but they hurt even more since no one could see those ones.

The silence always felt like the most hurtful of punishments. Especially the silence that came after the words they made him believe to be the truth.

And Yunho, well, Yunho was always there to stop the silence from becoming too loud. But now, he was standing beside the one that provoked the pain and said silence. The one who kept haunting Mingi's mind.

“Hey, you idiot!” He heard Wooyoung say, the other guitarist from the original lineup of the band. “If he doesn't want to be here, let it be his loss. We can do so much better without him, you can do so much better.”

And that's how Mingi ended up stepping up in the place that once belonged to the man he called soulmate. That's how he became the vocalist from H.A.L.A.

And the bass once played by Yunho, also saw a fresh face. San, Wooyoung’s boyfriend and the biggest cinnamon roll with looks that could kill.

But Mingi knew that he could try to replace every part of Yunho in his life, but he could never forget him. He could never forget the boy who taught him to love and he could never erase all of their kisses, all of their moments, all of them.

“No, no te puedo olvidar. No, no te puedo borrar”

II

They knew only time could mend certain things and that's how H.A.L.A managed to score a North America tour after a few months of Yunho leaving them for The Sopros.

Yeosang sometimes would show Mingi the nicest comments about the change, the band and himself. Most of the fans stood with them and they actually loved the change. They loved Mingi's voice, after all, they always asked him to sing more. For a while, they kept talking about Yunho's sudden departure, and there were all types of rumours being produced. However, when he got announced as the new vocalist for The Sopros, the fans knew better than anyone how the other three boys were betrayed, stabbed in the back and even in the front. Straight in their hearts.

The first show of a tour always felt nerve-wracking and starting in their hometown didn't make Mini less nervous. He didn't want to see disappointed looks in the crowd. He didn't want to see his parents.

Minsoo was home, after a while, promised to show up and enjoy his brother's love for the music he produced. Minsoo was so proud of what the youngest had accomplished after all the shit they went through and he wished Mingi knew all about it. He wished Mingi could see how loved he was by their little broken family and his friends.

There was a curtain song Mingi was scared of playing and terrified of the feedback he could be getting. The boy no longer had pink short hair, he was now supporting an incredible shade of platinum blond and the hair had grown a lot. Everyone kept talking about how more mature but yet cute he looked. Some commented it was his way of leaving his old life behind. The life with Yunho in it.

They hadn't talked for a while, not even come paths with each other.

And what Mingi did not expect was to find Yunho's eyes in the middle of the crowd. Seeing his arms wrapped around someone else while he sang. Seeing him with Jaebum.

“I gotta get outta fucking love.” Mingi sang, the bloodshot eyes becoming more noticeable by the minute. The tears were already falling without him knowing.

But he knew something, he knew that life is a party that has to come to an end and that Yunho…well, Yunho was his unforgettable dance.